Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 He's probably just an idiot. You'll have to decide whether that's a deal breaker for you. For some people it isn't. Umm, yeah, no idiots for me, thanks.
Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 Oup pelaye... I said I wasn't perfect....and I did email the guy.....
Art_Critic Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 This thread made go find the database for the FireFox plugin.. I now can speel again Lizzie...
Lizzie60 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I said I wasn't perfect....and I did email the guy..... Good but from your OP you said: An educated person should know how to spell those words. Pheewwww... good thing we cannot base our opinions on typos We all make them.. so I am surprised that you even think that..
Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 Good but from your OP you said: An educated person should know how to spell those words. Pheewwww... good thing we cannot base our opinions on typos We all make them.. so I am surprised that you even think that.. I agree with you that they could be typos. Obviously I make them, too I shouldn't type while watching gymnastics at the Olympics. I guess that part of the reason I took a second look at his email was because he obviously didn't double check his message. I would think if you were trying to get to know someone, and the written word is the basis of your communication, that you would take a moment to review your message. Do you see what I mean? However, after seeing some of the responses here, I decided that it was not a big deal and I decided to return his message. Also, his picture is really small and I can barely see him. I guess it was those two things that made me think twice about continuing the conversation.
KinAZ Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I think you're being too picky. I say this because there are PLENTY of educated people who are poor spellers. I'm not the best speller either, and I'm not going to spell check when sending a personal email. I certainly don't have the best grammar in the world, but there are some errors that bug the heck out of me. Like nails across a chalk board to my ears, so I can sympathize. BUT, don't question someone's education simply because they make a few typos and don't take the time to check them over, unless it's a business communication. My BCOM prof was a horrible speller... well educated, with an impressive resume. But the fact is that some people, no matter how smart or experienced they are, don't spell as well as others. (I know not to start a sentence with "but", but I did it anyway! ) I agree with Shadowplay.
SnapCracklePop Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 He spelled architects, architehcts (extra "h"). He spelled restaurant, resteraunt. He wrote someones, instead of someone's. If that's all you got, then I think you are making too big a deal. I try to correct my typos, but sometimes they get missed. But I can agree that if it were to continue, and there were sufficient numbers of typos, grammar and punctuation errors, this would annoy me. Case in point.. one of my acquaintances constantly capiltalizes words randomly throughout his sentences. He writes his sentences so they read like they would be spoken casually (i.e. cuz instead of because). He always mispells the simplest of words and his grammar in general is terrible. I know he is a very good person, but I still get annoyed when I read his emails.
AriaIncognito Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I also enjoy someone who takes the time to write properly, however my latest beau I met in person rather than online, and I got to know him before I knew his online "persona". He puts apostrophes where they don't belong. He uses the word "brang" sometimes in conversation. Had I saw a personal ad with these issues, I probably wouldn't have bothered replying. However, since I didn't see him that way, I gave him a shot, and honestly, I'm glad that I did. If those are the worst things I can find about him, I'm not doing all that badly. He's certainly not unintelligent, he's advanced in his career and even has a patent in his field. I think some people just strive in some areas, whereas others don't care or don't focus on it because it doesn't impact their everyday life all that much. Basing dating off of online skills, is probably not the best criteria for weeding, because you'll potentially miss out on some great people who just happen to not get a kick out of the English language.
grogster Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 For me, it would be a turn-off. If the women was attractive, however, I'd talk with her. Good conversation can compensate for bad writing. And great sex can compensate for just about anything.
Shygirl15 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 He spelled architects, architehcts (extra "h"). He spelled restaurant, resteraunt. He wrote someones, instead of someone's. The most common one I get is 'their' instead of 'there'. No offense but seems to me most black guys/people have problems with grammar.
Shygirl15 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 For me, it would be a turn-off. If the women was attractive, however, I'd talk with her. Good conversation can compensate for bad writing. And great sex can compensate for just about anything. I guess you meant 'woman'? Sorry, couldn't help but notice..
SnapCracklePop Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I guess you meant 'woman'? Sorry, couldn't help but notice.. Hmmm grogster... I think she is sharp shooting you!
grogster Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Hmmm grogster... I think she is sharp shooting you! Ouch! I consider myself sniped!
Angel1111 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I have to admit that poor spelling gets my attention in a big way. But, I have also learned that this is often not an indicator of a person's intelligence so I think you should give the guy a chance and overlook this. Poor spelling usually has to do with a person not being detail-oriented. I wouldn't worry about it unless there are other signs that point to the fact that his intelligence isn't what you need in a guy.
KinAZ Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 I also enjoy someone who takes the time to write properly, however my latest beau I met in person rather than online, and I got to know him before I knew his online "persona". He puts apostrophes where they don't belong. He uses the word "brang" sometimes in conversation. This is a great point. Generally, when we meet someone in person it takes awhile before we see what they look like in type. I know a few people who speak well, but their typing... well, it's not that great. One guy, it was weird because it seemed like his spelling didn't match up to his vocab at all. I can see how that might be a deal breaker for some, but this... I don't think his errors where THAT bad. I know that many people (like myself) will be rather lazy or simply creative in non-business settings. I think it's more important that a guy be able to write and speak properly when it counts.
Trimmer Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Well, I have to say that the spelling thing would get my attention, too, although I would be inclined to keep it in perspective and still check someone out if other indications were positive. On the other side, good use of the language turns me on a little bit. I was with a woman who used a couple of really well crafted metaphors and I was smitten... No offense but seems to me most black guys/people have problems with grammar. Actually, prefacing something with "no offense" doesn't make an offensive statement any less offensive; it just advertises that you are about to say something you know to be offensive.
Shygirl15 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Actually, prefacing something with "no offense" doesn't make an offensive statement any less offensive; it just advertises that you are about to say something you know to be offensive, but do not intend to offend anyone.
Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 Thanks everyone, these responses have been really informative and helpful. Well, most of them anyway
StartingOver07 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Cherry - I'll confess. Those errors would bug me. Not saying he can't be a smart guy with bad typing/spelling, but I'd be happier if he was a smart guy with good typing/spelling. Besides, who wants to someday receive a love note with typos?
Lizzie60 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Cherry - I'll confess. Those errors would bug me. Not saying he can't be a smart guy with bad typing/spelling, but I'd be happier if he was a smart guy with good typing/spelling. Besides, who wants to someday receive a love note with typos? I agree.. I, too, would prefer a smart guy with good spelling.. BUT better have a love letter with a few mistakes (cute) than none at all..
Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 When's the last time you received a love letter? *sigh* My college boyfriend used to send me the sweetest cards....15 years ago!....no spelling errors in sight....
Cheza2920 Posted August 11, 2008 Posted August 11, 2008 Okay so I didnt read all the post but just to respond to the OP, I personally think that the PURPOSE of an engagement is to prepare for the wedding. My friend was engaged for two years before the wedding. I never understood this. If you are not ready to get married, why don't you wait a year and a half and THEN get engaged? And if you are ready to get married, then why do you need to say it but then wait two whole years before taking any steps forward? I also know someone who wanted to wait like, a year for the wedding because they wanted to have it on a certain day (the 4th of July). Well, if you are having premarital sex, you aren't going to stop cause you got engaged. She got pregnant a few months later and was to large to fit in her corset-boned dress. So now they have to wait ANOTHER YEAR before she can have the baby and slim down to fit in her dress, all because it for some reason HAS to be on July 4th. Like I said, the purpose of an engagement is to get the planning done, get the word out that a wedding is coming up so people can make arrangements, and prepare for the wedding. The engagement, in my opinion, shouldn't be any longer than it needs to be. After all, the reason you got engaged was to get married, right?
Author Cherry Blossom 35 Posted August 11, 2008 Author Posted August 11, 2008 Okay so I didnt read all the post but just to respond to the OP, I personally think that the PURPOSE of an engagement is to prepare for the wedding. My friend was engaged for two years before the wedding. I never understood this. If you are not ready to get married, why don't you want a year and a half and THEN get engaged? And if you are ready to get married, then why do you need to say it but then wait two whole years before taking any steps forward? I also know someone who wanted to wait like, a year for the wedding because they wanted to have it on a certain day (the 4th of July). Well, if you are having premarital sex, you aren't going to stop cause you got engaged. She got pregnant a few months later and was to large to fit in her corset-boned dress. So now they have to wait ANOTHER YEAR before she can have the baby and slim down to fit in her dress, all because it for some reason HAS to be on July 4th. Like I said, the purpose of an engagement is to get the planning done, get the word out that a wedding is coming up so people can make arrangements, and prepare for the wedding. The engagement, in my opinion, shouldn't be any longer than it needs to be. After all, the reason you got engaged was to get married, right? Well, at this point, I have only written him online. So I think engagement is premature. After all, I can barely see him in my picture. What do you think? Should I bring up marriage, babies, see what he thinks? *Wink*
Mustang Sally Posted August 12, 2008 Posted August 12, 2008 For me, intelligent use of language and grammar are huge turn-ons. (Especially the written word.) They don't negate lack of physical chemistry, however. I don't begrudge anyone an occasional typo here and there. Who doesn't have occasional typos and misspellings? I certainly do. But continual misuse (or just poor use) of language wouldn't work long-term for me. Just my opinion.
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