Ingenue Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 Do you think that the manner in which the break up occurs affects the impressions you hold of your ex even years later? Some of us will always view the ex in unflattering terms because of the break up itself. But I wonder whether ex-partners/ex-lovers have more success becoming friends if the break up is amicable. I was thinking about this today as I wondered whether I would feel differently towards my ex had he broke up with me in different manner. I was dumped by email after five years together and truth be told, it's left a somewhat unpleasant taste in my mouth. I don't view him with the same eyes now as I did pre-break up. Is it because of the break up method? I certainly don't hate him as I've realised that all of us are human and we all live our lives the best we know how to do. I honestly wonder whether I would have the same level of admiration and respect for him if he broke up with me face-to-face? Would I be more likely to form a friendship with him years later if the break up wasn't so, in my opinion, callous? Do any of you still hold grudges years later because of the break up method? Have any of you gotten past a particularly horrendous break up method to establish friendships? And would it matter to you how you were broken up by your partner or broke up with your partner?
sfsassy Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 Do you think that the manner in which the break up occurs affects the impressions you hold of your ex even years later? Some of us will always view the ex in unflattering terms because of the break up itself. But I wonder whether ex-partners/ex-lovers have more success becoming friends if the break up is amicable. I was thinking about this today as I wondered whether I would feel differently towards my ex had he broke up with me in different manner. I was dumped by email after five years together and truth be told, it's left a somewhat unpleasant taste in my mouth. I don't view him with the same eyes now as I did pre-break up. Is it because of the break up method? I certainly don't hate him as I've realised that all of us are human and we all live our lives the best we know how to do. I honestly wonder whether I would have the same level of admiration and respect for him if he broke up with me face-to-face? Would I be more likely to form a friendship with him years later if the break up wasn't so, in my opinion, callous? Do any of you still hold grudges years later because of the break up method? Have any of you gotten past a particularly horrendous break up method to establish friendships? And would it matter to you how you were broken up by your partner or broke up with your partner? My ex, who I was with for a year, broke up with me while I wwas stoill celerating Christmas with my family. He still loved me "but not that much". It was horrid. One of the wort days of my life. There had been NO warning. I now see we weren't meant to be, and all of that. However, I lost respect for him due to the breakup method. He had seemed like a honorable guy and in the end he wasn't. Oh yes, he lived ten minutes from me, and we had set up a date at his place the next day. We tried friendship, but I was too bitter, and he didn't get why I was bitther, and it was a mess. We broke up in 2004, and last year was the first year, I didn't feel totally depressed at Christmas. I think this year will be even better as I'm past the grudge, finally. (Thank God, lol.0
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