dreamy1945 Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 To make a long story short been having an affair with MM -I am also married. We both left our spouses 6 weeks ago but he went back after 3 weeks because he couldn't make it financially. He is disabled and only gets $400.00 a month. He is 62 yrs old and is looking at total knee replacement surgery as he is "bone to bone". His wife is the "breadwinner" in the family and lets it be known. Her mother deeded the home to her 8 years ago and she put it in her name only. Well, that has been the problem with Mike as he didn't find this out until a few months ago. He thought the house was still in the mother in laws name. This resentment has caused the marriage problems he has. Wife knows about me and we all had a big blowup 2 weeks ago. He kept lying to her and she finally called him on "our phone" (extra phone I had) and told him to come to her office and bring him the phone. On his way to the office he called me and said please don't answer your phone unless you know for sure who it is. I will call you from a pay phone later today. Well of course I didn't answer when he called and then he called from his house and told me he would call me the next day and maybe we could talk. That was 2 weeks ago and I haven't heard a word from him. Talked to his best friend and he told me the only reason he went back was because of finances and he wants his share of the money from the house. He does deserve it as he took a year off from work to build the house. Anyway, he said to me 2 weeks ago please don't change your phone number until you talk to me. How could he just not call when that day he still wanted to see and talk to me. My guess is that when he got home that day all hell broke loose. His friend told me he loved me and was having a really hard time. What does this mean?
dylanatalanta Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 To make a long story short been having an affair with MM -I am also married. We both left our spouses 6 weeks ago but he went back after 3 weeks because he couldn't make it financially. He is disabled and only gets $400.00 a month. He is 62 yrs old and is looking at total knee replacement surgery as he is "bone to bone". His wife is the "breadwinner" in the family and lets it be known. Her mother deeded the home to her 8 years ago and she put it in her name only. Well, that has been the problem with Mike as he didn't find this out until a few months ago. He thought the house was still in the mother in laws name. This resentment has caused the marriage problems he has. Wife knows about me and we all had a big blowup 2 weeks ago. He kept lying to her and she finally called him on "our phone" (extra phone I had) and told him to come to her office and bring him the phone. On his way to the office he called me and said please don't answer your phone unless you know for sure who it is. I will call you from a pay phone later today. Well of course I didn't answer when he called and then he called from his house and told me he would call me the next day and maybe we could talk. That was 2 weeks ago and I haven't heard a word from him. Talked to his best friend and he told me the only reason he went back was because of finances and he wants his share of the money from the house. He does deserve it as he took a year off from work to build the house. Anyway, he said to me 2 weeks ago please don't change your phone number until you talk to me. How could he just not call when that day he still wanted to see and talk to me. My guess is that when he got home that day all hell broke loose. His friend told me he loved me and was having a really hard time. What does this mean? Have you gone back to your H?
crystal_lostheart Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 So sorry to hear that he went back. This is what I am scared my MM would do if he even bothered to leave. You must be so confused right now. This is what my MM also worries about - finances - and he is the breadwinner!! Go figure. It seems to me, no matter what, we keep banging our head against a brick wall and our voice is never heard. It's all about them and their needs. Do you really want to go through this again, if it does happen again?? Leaving, coming back, excuses, excuses. Just seems to be a common thread....
me003 Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 So sorry to hear that he went back. This is what I am scared my MM would do if he even bothered to leave. You must be so confused right now. This is what my MM also worries about - finances - and he is the breadwinner!! Go figure. It seems to me, no matter what, we keep banging our head against a brick wall and our voice is never heard. It's all about them and their needs. Do you really want to go through this again, if it does happen again?? Leaving, coming back, excuses, excuses. Just seems to be a common thread.... These are excuses he is using. What would happen if he was alone, not married and STILl had to have this surgery??? how woudl he manage? He would def find a way to make it happen. Did he think that the house would be given to both of them from your In-law? Maybe it's me,but in my will I have my child, not dad, not anyone, but my child as beneficiary. As a mother i want MY child to be taken care of, but their spouse, that my child job to do. (((i do think differently, but sorry i gave birth to my child not his future extended family)))
Owl Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 I'd guess that he went back, his wife caught him AGAIN and confronted him...and told him that if he broke NC with you one more time, he was kicked to the curb. He made his choice to stay. At this point, your best bet is to simply move on and heal yourself.
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