NoIDidn't Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 I saw that in Virginia a woman was arrested for trying to kill her boyfriend........AND his W!!! I didn't think it happened that way. Usually we warn the OP of the BS's anger and all. This was strange to me.
me003 Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 didn't catch it, but i did catch a police officer's wife tried to shoot him a year after he had an affair... no more info was given so who knows what reallly did her in.
Author NoIDidn't Posted August 7, 2008 Author Posted August 7, 2008 didn't catch it, but i did catch a police officer's wife tried to shoot him a year after he had an affair... no more info was given so who knows what reallly did her in. This is more common, I think. Or the MM that tries to kill his (usually) former OW to keep her from spilling the beans, or having the baby, or whatever sick and twisted rationale he is following. But an OW that actually tried to kill the couple? What were they doing to her? The News even went as far as to state that the former OW was a president or so for a non-profit charity. Not sure what they needed to add that for. But, weird. Really, weird.
syz Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 there was a story not that long ago not to far from where I lived in CO where the OW killed the Wife. I would think that violence due to an affair usually occurs between spouses and usually I believe it is the husband either being cuckolded or killing his wife to get her out of the way but it has made the news several times where the OW has done in the wife or tried too. But honestly I've never seen a news story where the wife killed the OW.
GPFan Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 there was a story not that long ago not to far from where I lived in CO where the OW killed the Wife. I would think that violence due to an affair usually occurs between spouses and usually I believe it is the husband either being cuckolded or killing his wife to get her out of the way but it has made the news several times where the OW has done in the wife or tried too.Shawna Nelson (a married woman) shot her lover's wife, Heather Garraus, in the head. But honestly I've never seen a news story where the wife killed the OW.The most famous is Betty Broderick who shot her ex-husband and the OW whilst they slept. To round it out, there are many stories of men murdering their wives or their OWs, especially pregnant OWs.
SueBee3490 Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 To round it out, there are many stories of men murdering their wives or their OWs, especially pregnant OWs. Yes, just the case recently, few mos ago, of the policeman murdering his pregnant gf (I think in Ohio) not real sure about that. She was the pretty blonde and was like 8 mos pregnant and had one little boy. Not quite sure of his background other than married and he was African American. Also another case of OW going after the BS. Years ago the whole Joey Buttafucco (sp?)/Amy Fisher story in which the Joey's gf (Amy) shot his wife in the head. She lived. I remember that being on the news ALOT. I think they've even made TV movie about it.
Owl Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 What about that whackdoodle astronut who drove across country in a diaper last year or year before?
Terminator Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 If you watch any TruTV (it used to be Court TV) you see enough murder stories involving affairs (regardless of who was the perp/victim) to make your blood chill. Some of the stories are quite old too. Just remembered, what about the woman in Tx (?) that ran her husband down and then backed over him after he had an A? Worst case? Susan Smith who murdered her KIDS because the OM didn't want to have children.
Owl Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 :sick:Yep...you can clearly see how affairs HELP marriages in all of these events.
Terminator Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 The only marriage an affair would "help" is one that was dead already and long overdue to be buried, in my humble opinion.
herenow Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 I think if a person is emotionally disturbed, an affair situation can make them snap no matter what part they play. I don't think it's really about the person being the BW, OW or MM, but more about that individual's psychological state to begin with.
SueBee3490 Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 :sick:Yep...you can clearly see how affairs HELP marriages in all of these events. Yes - truly "crimes of passion" as they are called. Nothing can bring out the anger in you like being betrayed by someone you love.
Owl Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 Yes - truly "crimes of passion" as they are called. Nothing can bring out the anger in you like being betrayed by someone you love. ...or betraying a "friend" with that friend's spouse. To this day, my wife's OM still has no idea how close he was to a date with a woodchipper.
whichwayisup Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 Yes - truly "crimes of passion" as they are called. Nothing can bring out the anger in you like being betrayed by someone you love. People can do real crazy things when pushed past their emotional limit. One doesn't have to be emotional disturbed to begin with..
herenow Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 People can do real crazy things when pushed past their emotional limit. One doesn't have to be emotional disturbed to begin with.. WWIU, I usually agree with you, but I have to say if someone can kill another person over an affair they are, in my opinion, emotionally disturbed. I don't think the cases talked about in this thread are normal people being pushed to their limit. I will agree that someone can be pushed to do things they wouldn't ordinarily do, but I don't think an affair is something that should push a stable person to commit murder. Divorce maybe, but murder, I don't think so. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, I'm just saying that those people probably have issues to begin with.
Terminator Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 "crimes of passion" don't even have to involved married people. It's been known for an ex bf to kill the ex gf - and the list goes on Parents (usually males) have even been known to kill their children rather than lose custody. Sometimes the world can be a very sad place.
GreenEyedLady Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 WWIU, I usually agree with you, but I have to say if someone can kill another person over an affair they are, in my opinion, emotionally disturbed. I don't think the cases talked about in this thread are normal people being pushed to their limit. I will agree that someone can be pushed to do things they wouldn't ordinarily do, but I don't think an affair is something that should push a stable person to commit murder. Divorce maybe, but murder, I don't think so. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, I'm just saying that those people probably have issues to begin with. I agree with you HN.
bentnotbroken Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 I think there is only so much the psyche can handle before it snaps. I did feel like killing someone, unfortunately I was that person. I was willing to remove myself from the pain. Thank God I didn't. But I can completely see the possibility with some people who are considered normal.
herenow Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 I think there is only so much the psyche can handle before it snaps. I did feel like killing someone, unfortunately I was that person. I was willing to remove myself from the pain. Thank God I didn't. But I can completely see the possibility with some people who are considered normal. Feeling like killing someone and actually doing it are two very different things.
Author NoIDidn't Posted August 7, 2008 Author Posted August 7, 2008 Feeling like killing someone and actually doing it are two very different things. Also being suicidal differs from being homicidal.
Owl Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 I will agree that someone can be pushed to do things they wouldn't ordinarily do, but I don't think an affair is something that should push a stable person to commit murder. Divorce maybe, but murder, I don't think so. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, I'm just saying that those people probably have issues to begin with. For a lot of BS's, the emotional trauma they suffer as a result of their spouse's choice to cheat is absolutely the worst damage they've suffered in their life. Many 'experts' compare it to the loss of a child or parent, or the emotional trauma of rape. I've told my story before. I'm an ex-combat vet. I've suffered PTSD twice in my life...the first was from combat, the second was from my wife's affair. It was the MOST devestating thing I've personally dealt with...to include the loss of both my parents (my father as a child, my mother as an adult), combat, living on the streets as a teenager...you name it. Trust me...its EASY to see how an affair could trigger someone to violence. If they have ANY kind of propensity towards it...or if they've done it for a living (as I said, combat vet)...trust me, its entirely feasible that they could go to this level, when in any other 'normal' circumstance they wouldn't consider it. As I said...OM to this day has NO idea how close he was...my wife was scared to death that I was going to go after him. At the bottom line of all of this, my kids saved his life. I didn't want them to lose their father.
bentnotbroken Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 Feeling like killing someone and actually doing it are two very different things. You didn't understand what I was saying. I felt like killing and I am fully capable(anger management issues), but I chose to turn my anger inward. But they both could have died and I would have been completely happy with that.
Tomcat33 Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 Ultimately we are 100% in control of our emotions and what we do with them. Granted society plays a big role in pushing people to think and feel a certain way but at the end of the day and when all is said and done just as we own our personal feelings what we do with them in terms of how we let them affect our actions is also something of which we have complete ownership. Here is an intersting spin to this situation, if someone can justify being pushed to the edge in terms of commiting a crime of passion, can we also not accept that some people who cheat are also pushed to the limit emotionally and hence act out with infidelity? Feeling like killing someone and actually doing it are two very different things. WHOA! I can honestly say that even the person I have hated the most in my life, even the person that I felt did me the most wrong or pizzed me off I have never ever ever felt like I wanted them dead. Is it abnormal not to have ever wanted or wished someone dead?
Owl Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 Good question, TC. And I'm on the other end of the spectrum...I very seriously sat down and gave careful consideration as to whether or not I would take that kind of action against OM. I know it sounds horrible, but that's really what happened. I sat down, weighed the pro's and con's, considered several possibilities...and at the end of that decided that it simply wasn't the best choice in my situation. I decided to try to save my marriage and my family rather than taking him out. I figured that the two goals were mutually exclusive. Had I made the other choice...it would have happened. I was VERY good at my multiple jobs and duties in the military, and had the opportunity to get training and explore jobs that very few people in the world get to do. Some of it are things that I would 'take back" if I could. But at the end, it left me with a lot more tools than most. And I sometimes wonder if I'M a freak as a result of all of this...because I can sit down so easily and contemplate something like this and not lose one bit of sleep over it.
herenow Posted August 8, 2008 Posted August 8, 2008 WHOA! I can honestly say that even the person I have hated the most in my life, even the person that I felt did me the most wrong or pizzed me off I have never ever ever felt like I wanted them dead. Is it abnormal not to have ever wanted or wished someone dead? My comment was in response to someone who said they thought about it. So, I said that thinking about something and actually doing it are different. I never said that thinking about killing someone was a healthy thought either. Please try to keep things in context. I believe that when I wish bad for others, it comes back to me. So, I am not one to wish any kind of harm to anyone. I'm just giving my opinion on the subject of this thread.
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