movingonandon Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 Somebody mentioned the word "stranger" in a thread below. I just realised that that's exactly how I feel regarding my ex. I had a pretty rough month after she dumped me, but I'm kinda on the way to recovery now. But more and more, when I try to think about her, I wonder did i ever realy know her, and now i just have visions of this completely foreign person. This, and all my memories with her are fading very quickly. This is a sad feeling after 5 years. No, it's just plain distressing. I'd rather remember everything... Or, would i? perhaps it's better to forget everyting and start over. Dating again helps, but not that much.
babes23 Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 Hiya, most people including myself think that way. Perhaps at the end of the relationship you get to see a different side of a person, a character which is true to themselves.
HopeDiesLast Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 not so sure actually. i mean, is the person you dated for X yrs not the REAL person? How can you carry that on for that long? or is it that the person post break up was there all along and you couldn't see it bc you CHOSE not to? Who knows!
Ingenue Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 For me at least, I think the perception of "stranger-ness" is in part attributed to my coping strategies. If I begin to see my ex as somebody I never knew, the loss of him seems less devastating. Distance and time certainly add to that feeling. The fact that I no longer talk to him for 2 hours every day makes me feel less connected. It doesn't matter that we dated for 5 years. Months of absence and non-communication can erase any sense of closeness I felt for my ex. I think another part of it is as HopeDiesLast says, that love seems to obfuscate those things that seem insignificant when you're in the relationship. Rose coloured glasses always seem to mask the inconsiderateness, the rudeness, the provincialism, the things that don't bother us when we're liplocked with another human being. I'm already beginning to feel like my ex is a stranger to me. The circumstances in which he dumped me cast him in a whole new light (one that I either newer saw or refused to see before).
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