Sassi75 Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 Yea, I got it out of my system also. I'm not sure how they can't see it! Other than to say it's just not what they want right now. It blows my mind. I mean I was there cooking, cleaning, taking care of him,..you name it. We did SO many things together. We had SO much fun together. How could he really choose golfing and drinking & his good-for-nothing drinking buddies over what we had? It's just not logical.
Author HopeDiesLast Posted August 6, 2008 Author Posted August 6, 2008 why am i so tempted to text him? whyyyyyyyyyyy
Sassi75 Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 Hope - I'm right there with you! I want to text in the WORST way today for some reason. WE CAN'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!! BE STRONG!!!!!
Author HopeDiesLast Posted August 6, 2008 Author Posted August 6, 2008 What if he never calls me??? Hes gotta call at some point, right?????? RIGHT???
Sassi75 Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 I would think, at some point--he would contact you. I just can't believe after being with someone for so long, you can just cut if off--just like that! It seems totally not even human to do that to someone. With my situation, we have a vacation that we were suppose to leave to go on together on Aug 28th. I had paid for the entire trip for us-- airfare & hotel. I would think that he would contact me about this trip if nothing else. But then again maybe he just thinks screw her,...she can pay for it I don't care.
Author HopeDiesLast Posted August 6, 2008 Author Posted August 6, 2008 what if he doesnt? what if this is what he wants? i mean i havent talked to him in almost a month- what the hell is going on here?
Sassi75 Posted August 6, 2008 Posted August 6, 2008 If he does not contact you, then you just have to accept what the reality is,..this relationship was not meant to be, and his decision was final. Your at two different stages in your lives right now, you wanting to settle down, and he wanting to still party it up. Who knows, maybe months down the road, or a year from now your paths will cross again and the timing will be right, and you'll both be on the same page with want you want. But in the mean time, your life has to keep moving forward.
Author HopeDiesLast Posted August 7, 2008 Author Posted August 7, 2008 moving on....moving forward- i need that defined like specific. WHAT can i do? Magic pill, please. I dont even know what i want anymore!
xaneurysmx Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 From my point of view, things don't happen for a reason, but because of reason(s). Yes, these guys (or gals, if you're "one of them" ) suck(!!!), but we have to take our responsibility in it. We allowed ourselves to be treated certain ways, pretended that things would change--that they would change--and ignored signs that told us things were not right, because we wanted to believe differently. You want to text/contact because you don't want to let that person go, but as long as you hold on to them and to the past, you are not allowing yourself to change and realize the person you want to be or have the type of relationship that you want to have. (I must keep reminding myself of this.)
xaneurysmx Posted August 7, 2008 Posted August 7, 2008 I'm not sure anyone has a good answer for that. Just one day at a time, with pain and fear and sorrow, the support of friends and family and your own strength and will to survive. It will take time, but give that to yourself. One piece of advice that I read from another user on this exact forum (whose name I unfortunately cannot recall) is to take this "opportunity" to go out and do all the things you always wanted to do but never had the time. You will find yourself again.
Author HopeDiesLast Posted August 8, 2008 Author Posted August 8, 2008 You will find yourself again. so true....i just want to be me again!! on a better note- im casually hanging out with someone new. not sure what i think. but its nice to have someone tell me im beautiful and actually WANT to hang out with me. is 2 months later too soon for that?
Deegee Posted October 1, 2008 Posted October 1, 2008 No, 2 months should be cool, but proceed with caution. If it doesn't feel right, then don't. I think that we keep ourselves (myself included) stuck in this purgatory when we keep going over the same things in our head with no relief, or satisfactory answer to all the "why's?". Truth is, we might NEVER know, and as for myself, the way I'm learning to let go is to first of all forgive. I'm choosing to get up and get moving with my life. The reason I forgive is NEVER EVER for anyone else but me. To be able to move on, and to be happy....I'M responsible for that....NO ONE ELSE. It's a DAILY process that you have to keep doing, and because I don't want to be stuck here indefinitely, I do what it takes to get me through. I cannot and DO NOT want someone that does not want to be with me....EVER. Heck, I might not have been the "ONE" for him, but I guarantee you that I am SOMEONE'S.... and until then, I'm letting go ,so that the one that truly belongs to me, can make his way to me. Hope this helps!
Author HopeDiesLast Posted October 1, 2008 Author Posted October 1, 2008 It does help, Deegee. Thank you. Its funny cus today has been particularly bad and its mostly my own fault- i throw myself back into the pain when i start to get better. And its just weird that this post came back up after a month or so. Its odd to reread my own stuff. Thank you agian
alwayssme Posted October 1, 2008 Posted October 1, 2008 Love hurts so0oo much when you lose it...its weird cuz when your in it, it makes u feel like heaven but once its gone...its hell....my ex broke up with me cuz "just fell out of love" he felt trapped in the relationship, wanted a new start with his life...he gave me plenty of reasons but i just didnt want to listen...i tried for 2 months straight to get him back...i tried everything..from playing har to get, to acting like i dont care to calling him crying to even seeing him and trying to talk things out....NOTHING worked..till i finally got the point...ITS OVER!! the worst part about it was that i wasnt willing to let it go....how could it be over? i wasnt trying to move on, i was trying to get him back...but the truth is u cant hold on to somebody who doesnt want to be held on to....the first month was the worst...i cried all day, everyday...it was the most painful time of my life...i truly felt like i couldnt live without him, i couldnt even smile...i was always sad....we kept in touch and saw each other a couple times after the break-up which reassured me even more that its over...now its been 2 months and it still hurts alot but i feel that its gettin better because im trying to accept the fact that he has moved on and doesnt want me in his life...now my goal is to forgive him for throwing two years away (so surprisingly too) and im trying to forget him....as much as i hate to face it, the truth is its over and he is not coming back!
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