GoodMan5498 Posted August 3, 2008 Posted August 3, 2008 Hi all, First of all, Im new here to thanks for listening. This all starts last week, when my girlfried of just under 22months was over at my place. We were just talking and I asked her what was wrong since she had been a bit subdued the week previous. She told me she had been thinking about stuff, some goodthings and some badthings. Obviously, as soon as she said bad things I started to think the worst, so I asked what these were. She wouldn't tell me at first but eventually she did. So anyway, it seems the bad things were that, she doesnt see us together in 10yrs time. Can't see us married with kids. Her reasons being... "Circumstances". She is going away for a year to study abroad next year, she feels I dont feel comfortable around her parents, and she also feels that she is holding me back and that I should be ready to settle down, whilst she isn't ready for this. After talking about this, I drove her home that night, and she was very upset, as was I. She wasn't sure what she wanted to do, but when I left her, she gave me a hug, kiss and ran into her house crying. Next morning, I got a message from her that she was so sorry and wished the night before hadn't happened. And that she still loved me. This went on for 4 days, until the night I phoned her. Yeah, the call was awkward at first, but we talked about things, and put forward what I thought, saying that I very much wanted things to work out and to lets just see what happens. 2 days later (a week from the first chat above) I saw her first thing in the morning for about 10 mins. We talked, she hugged me, saying she really had missed my hugs, then kissed me. I told her I loved her and she said she still loved me. Next day, I asked her to lunch, and we met up. We walked for a bit, and I brought up the subject, and she said "You probably want an answer don't you". Obviously I did... and the answer was we should break up. Slightly confused that she claims to still be in love with me... So, we walked a bit farther after this, and she took my hand, and was holding my hand as we walked. Just before I left her... I asked if she was sure, and said not to do that, cause she didnt want to have to think the whole situation over again. Just as we were leaving, she went to kiss me, made contect with my lips and pulled away, saying outloud... "I told myself i wasnt going to do that". Few hours later, that evening, she messaged me asking if I was ok. Wasnt going to lie, so I said I wasnt great but I would be ok. We messaged each other a bit that night, and she was upset that i didnt put a "x" (kiss) on the first message. Last night, she messaged me again. Saying "I tried but i just cant go to sleep without saying goodnight". I told her id been trying hard not too message her all day, and she told me that i just should have done it. And that she'll do whatever she wants with regards to me wanting her to message me or not. Incidentally, the day we broke up was a day she was going away for a weekend her folks. She is still there and she was messaging me from the car. I was there last year with her family, and she mentioned that she felt the memories were going to come back once she got there. And she started saying some of them via message on her way there. Im very confused by all this. I cant help but feel there is still something there, and that she is scared or something. Im just not sure. I feel so empty, but i dont want to push her away any further so i havent said anything to her. Any opinions would be great. Thanks
Recommended Posts