Nantes Posted August 2, 2008 Posted August 2, 2008 I’m looking for advice or opinions on a situation with someone I’ve recently met. I’m an attractive early-30’s lady who was in a relationship for 12 years, so I’m not an experienced dater. Any advice or thoughts you can share are appreciated. Last weekend I attended a music festival close to my city with some friends. As I was sitting by the sidelines watching a show, a guy sitting nearby struck up a conversation with me. It wasn’t really a “pick-up” conversation, just a friendly chat about the festival and other things we found in common. He was visiting from out of state 500 miles away. Note that I’ve been single by choice for almost a year, and am not actively looking to “hook up” or meet anyone, and I wasn’t particularly attracted to this man, so I was fairly relaxed and conversed in a friendly but not flirty manner. He bought both of us a drink, and then I bought the next round because I didn’t want to feel obligated. We both wanted to see the next band playing at a different stage, so we walked over there together. He seemed like a gentleman; confident, kind, outgoing and touchy-feely by nature, so when he put his arm around my waist as we stood in the packed audience, I didn’t think too much of it. He took some pictures of the performance and at the end he turned the camera and took a photo of us together. We were enjoying each other’s company, so we stood in line to see another show. Space was tight and we were standing very close, getting pushed against each other as the crowd squeezed in. He had his arm around me, and this made me feel safe in the crowd, so I put my arm around his back too. We were getting cozy and getting to know each with our conversation. After standing in line, we went into a beer garden where he bought both of us a drink. He had his arm around me as we walked to an open space; when we stopped he leaned in and kissed me on the lips; it was nice, light and not forceful. We kissed a few more times as we chatted and finished our drinks. I appreciate that he didn’t force himself down my throat and kept his hands off my butt and boobs – he seemed like a gentleman. No sparks flew for me, but then again it has been over a year since I’ve felt sparks for anyone, so maybe I’ve numbed that feeling. At the end of the night, like a gentleman, he walked me back to where I was staying. We arranged to meet again the next afternoon before another show. He made me put his number in my cell phone (his cell was dead), we hugged and kissed a few times, and said goodnight. I went to bed wondering “what does this all mean?” The next day when I went to meet him he was hard to find because he was hanging out with a group of his friends. He was welcoming and seemed glad to see me, and introduced me to his friends, but there was not much physical contact beyond placing his hand on my arm or waist when he spoke to me (I assume that’s his manner). So for a couple of hours I hung out with him and his friends. Most of the time he was talking with his friends; I tried to fit in and make conversation with the group too, despite feeling something like a hanger-on. I was carrying around a bag that I wanted to put in my friend’s car, so I said was going to the parking lot and would come back to meet his group later. I met my friends and dallied in my walk to the parking lot, so my return to the meeting spot was later than expected, and I couldn’t find him. I wasn’t eager enough to call or text to find him. Besides, my number was on his friend’s phone if he really needed it. (he had used my phone to text his friend yesterday). My friends and I drove back home that evening. I didn’t hear from him. He would be back in his town 500 miles away in two days. A couple of days later I texted him and asked if he could email me some photos of the show we were at. He texted back: “did u ditch me or i u? I came back a few times to check for you, glad you FINALLY texted. i will send pics in next few days”. (caps emphasis his) That was the last I’ve heard from him in four days. No email or text. I’ll admit that I'm not much of a user of text messaging, and not very aware of proper “text etiquette”. (i.e. should I have responded to his text?) Should I send him another text, or am I overthinking this, worrying about some guy who lives 500 miles away?
EYECANDY000 Posted August 2, 2008 Posted August 2, 2008 I think you are overthinking it! Send him another text, and if he doesnt responds then erase his number and move on. Besides he stays 500 miles away , and you said you didnt feel any sparks anyways.
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