She loves me but wont answer phone?

[vonerik012]

I was in a LDR, and she went back home.

 

For whatever reason she is very insecure, and she told me that she KNOWSIi will cheat. She cannot handle it. But she loves me.

 

We talked everyday for a few weeks, then her mother died. We were making plans for her to come right back.After that, things became difficult, and she said she can't handle everything anymore, and I should not call her anymore. She told me this several times.

 

I called the next day, and no answer. The next day, no answer or call back. The next day no answer or call back. So I gave up.

 

Then she texted me, telling me she loves me, but not to call, as she thinks I will find another woman.

 

Her birthday rolled around, and I called. I only called because she always asked if I would remember her birthday. I called her home number and she changed it. I then called her cell, and she answered.

 

She told me how much she misses me, loves me, and thinks of me everyday. She said was so happy I called on her birthday. She kept telling me she loves me, which is rare for her to say. We talked for a while. She then also asked why I quit calling her.(As if it was my idea) She said she was very sad as she was waiting by the phone at midnight thinking I would call.

 

I then called her the next 2 days, and her cell was off. I stopped calling again.

 

Since she changed her home number, does it seem like she found someone else? Or she really loves me, and it is just too hard, and that is her way of forgetting me? Maybe since her mother just died as well. She is alone with a small family, and not many friends, so it doesn't make much sense to shut me out too.

 

After a year of us being together i feel like I was treated pretty badly at the end. She changed her number, and just said don't call me. But then tells me how much she loves me. Then wont call me back or answer..

[LucreziaBorgia]

Sometimes it is wholly possible to love someone, and yet know that for whatever reason you just can't or don't want to be in a relationship with them. Perhaps a relationship with you just isn't right for her right now, regardless of how she feels about you.

 

If that is the case, the most humane thing you can do is to stop contacting her. I suspect that each time you do, it just hurts that much more for you both.

[carhill]

She's immature. Her actions reflect that, as do her words. She's also grieving her mother's death. Revisit this in a year, if you still think of her. My bet is, after that time, you'll see this for what it was, another step along the path. If you reconnect, bonus.

 

It's OK to love someone and not be in contact with them or have a relationship with them. You have infinite capacity to love. Spread it around

[movingonandon]

Some parts of this sound a lot like my ex (see the break up out of insecurity? thread). In fact, she has used the exact same words "I KNOW that you will cheat on me". As much as I miss her, I do not entertain any possibility of ever getting back with her. She needs to work on her issues, and at least I am not the kind of man that would take her back after a "break". If you are - more power to you.

A person who loves you will stick by you, no matter what the issues are. I'd suggest that you don't ever talk to her again and move on.

[vonerik012]

I really have lost interest in her after this..

 

Telling me she "knows i have another woman", and then using this as a reason to end it baffles me. I had zero interest in other women.

 

 

Then she blames ME for not calling her, when she refused to call me back or answer her phone for 3 days. I guess what makes me irritated is the fact that she just started throwing out how much she loves me, and misses me, and how great I was to her, and how everything was her fault, AND THEN not answering her phone or calling me back after a year of everyday contact.

 

This is what happened..

1. She was looking for ticket prices to come back

2. Mother died

3. She tells me not to call her anymore, as I have another woman.

4. Tells me how much she misses and loves me

5. Does not answer phone

[justaman99]

This is what happened..

1. She was looking for ticket prices to come back

2. Mother died

3. She tells me not to call her anymore, as I have another woman.

4. Tells me how much she misses and loves me

5. Does not answer phone

 

Her mother passed away. I would cut her some slack. This is a very if not the most traumatic thing that can happen to someone. I would send her a letter, hand written and tell her how you feel and try and reassure her. Tell her you know she's going through a rough time and all you want to do is be there for her but she's not letting you do that. There is only room for one person in your heart and that is reserved for her. If you can. offer to fly and be with her. Do this if you mean it of course.

 

If she closes the door on that I am not sure what to say. Maybe she's very insecure, maybe she's all closed up emotionally because of her mom's passing or maybe there's someone else. Many times those that accuse their sig other of cheating or that they will meet someone else, it's the accuser that already has.

 

-Just

[vonerik012]

But why would she change her home telephone number? Then she answered her cell to tell me how much she loves me, etc etc..

[justaman99]

But why would she change her home telephone number? Then she answered her cell to tell me how much she loves me, etc etc..

 

Maybe you should ask her. If you're going to change a number you might as well change both if you're trying to avoid someone and the first one would more likely be the cell number as well. It's odd.

[oasis]

Maybe you should ask her. If you're going to change a number you might as well change both if you're trying to avoid someone and the first one would more likely be the cell number as well. It's odd.

 

 

Good advice!