Whey2Big4u Posted July 31, 2008 Posted July 31, 2008 its been almost a year now since she left me.....in the most horrible of ways. ive gone NC ofr almost two months now, and its been doing me very well, but for some reason i can get her out of my head. there is not a day that goes by i dont think of her, and shes even in my dreasm almsot every night. Im tired of it. to top it all off, I am extremely lonely. although finiacially and future wise everyhting has gottne better for me, it doesnt make me happy. I miss having someone there, like she used to be, and i know...... the term used to be... I am kinda jelous of the fact how quickly she can get a guy, and yes so far there have been many, but now shes with this one guy who...if i were a girl, i wouldnt touch or have sex with!!! I have already gotten to know myself again and i like myself. Im funny, Im intersting, Im good looking, talented, well built............its just hard to find someon to accept me all over again. the last few weeks ive contemplated suicide, not to do it, but just thinking about it and wondering what keeps me going everyday. and trust me i wouldnt kill myself nor have any intentions Sadly i think its my dog that keeps me going every day, i dont know what he would do without me. Part of me would give up everythign i have now, to get back what i once had, but i dont think i can have my cake and eat it too. I know im rambling, but it helps alot
ioncebelieved Posted July 31, 2008 Posted July 31, 2008 Hey whey 2 big, it is hard as I understand your pain! May I suggest you continue drinking that whey isolate protein and whatever you use doing your regiment and build that monument you have always dreamed of! Now your mind. You have to actively tell yourself to stop thinking of ex every time she pops in there...ya feel me? I mean that with all of me!!! I still have to do it myself. Just because you have thought about suicide does not mean you are a whack job, just mean you are in an extreme amount of pain. Wake up each and every day and tell yourself, "I am great, I am prize, I am a great guy and if my ex could not see it, some fabulous woman will!!!" They say time heals all wounds, but the greater question is what do you in between the time of start of the pain until it ends???? You keep living my friend!! Some days are good and others just plain suck!! I am with you on the pain as I still recover myself! Good luck and Ms. Wonderful is just around the corner if you can allow a place in your heart and mind for her.
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