How Do I Show Her I Have Changed So I Can Get My Last Chance?

[Heartbreakovertextin]

So we've been together for about 9 months now and last Sunday I got a text from her telling me she thinks we need a break ( while shes been on vacation with her family in Red Bluff north California ). Of course I blow it all out of proportion and take it like all the things that she said to me were lies.....( such as I will never leave and I would never be able to live without you.....and the writing on my bed pretty much saying the same thing ) Before she left we had a blowout because I was scared of her not coming back to me because previously when her family came down I was going to take them all out to the movies and she ditched me, yea it hurt but I understand she only sees them once every couple years...... her mom also went back to jail the Tuesday before. We have been talking and she says we are friends right now and that she will not be seeing any other guys and vice versa. She tells me I know that she loves me and finally got her to go right out and tell me she does. She says we went on a break because of my anger and that its to intense for her to handle and I understand. I never ever and never will lay a hand on her, Im so deeply in love with her and vice versa she just wants me to change and not explode at her. I know I shouldn't change but I am willing to go through anything for her.... I mean I wake up stressed out because I just want her to see that I have changed and just give me that last chance shes just waiting on me.... but what if she never sees that ive changed and im constantly trying to show her that I have. I even went to a phsyciatrist for her, which I wouldn't do for my own mom. Please Give Me Some Advice On How I Can Show Her That I Have Changed or Rerouted My Anger to Another Form ( Drums, Punching Bag, etc..) Please Im In Desperate Need of Some Help

[Amacada]

While it is admirable that you are seeking to change, your motivation is questionable.

You need to be doing it for yourself NOT for her - if you change for someone else, the change will only be temporary.

 

The way you know that you're truly doing it for you and not for her?....when you realise that you don't care that much if she gets to see the 'new you' or not - because your approval of yourself is all that matters.

 

I know that's not what you want to hear but your path (at the moment) will only be a quick-fix (if it works at all).

[justaman99]

I don't have a lot of respect for someone who texts you "we need a break" when they are out of town. What a ****ty thing to do. I would lose a lot of respect for them regardless of the situation or the reason. A phone call at the very least but even better wait til you guys are near each other to talk it out.

 

-Just

[Heartbreakovertextin]

Now she just cut me off completely because the day she was coming home she kept telling me she was sick and she wish it would stop.... at first I thought she was pregnant. But turns out she hasn't missed her monthly so I shouldn't worry..... but then she said everyday for the last 9 months we have been together that she was stressing out everyday.... I mean is it me or just having the commitment? Then I told her she can't be playing with my heart like this and she got all defensive and told me that I would never get it and that she can't take me back right now and she need time to just chill and think about what she wants to do.... what im asking is do you think she will just forget about me and leave me hanging? or just tell me whats going to happen once shes had her time to think.....? She doesn't want us seeing other people so theres still hope? and I mean she would have to tell me what me and her is going to do right? I mean ive started talking to another girl but she has been hurt also and doesn't want anything serious and she seems really into me.... but she does the whole friends with benefits thing and in my mind thats wrong and I don't agree with it what so ever.... please guys I really need some help...