theconsultant Posted July 30, 2008 Posted July 30, 2008 On a particularly lonely recent evening I posted an ad on Craigslist hoping to meet a cute girl. It has never worked for me in the past but I didn't have anything better to do. To my surprise I got a response from a girl I know. She didn't know it was my ad of course, since I had kept it anonymous. I have not dated her before but we have casually met a couple of times and we have exchanged several emails. So I replied to her email with a small world comment and said I would love to see her. I am assuming it is obvious that I would see her under different circumstances this time. She did not reply to my email for a couple of days but I have known her to be slow to respond to emails in the past. She always writes long emails but also takes her time. So I texted her and asked if we could talk over coffee. She replied back saying "I read your email but I was busy. Sorry I didn't write back. It will be nice to meet for coffee sometime. But I'll be gone for a while because I'm going to San Francisco tomorrow." I feel like this is an excuse to avoid going out with me, or to delay and buy more time and hope I'll give up. What do folks in this group feel? Do women commonly use such a tactic? Thanks in advance for any help!
Angel1111 Posted July 30, 2008 Posted July 30, 2008 I've never used it but I guess she could be saying that to buy time. Or she really could be going out of town. Is there something in your past with her that would cause her to not want to go out with you? Did you just drift apart as friends or did somethihg negative happen? It's just really hard to say what's going on because I would not do this to someone. I wouldn't answer an ad and then take 2 days to answer back to someone I already knew. At best, I think her behavior is rude. And that may be a sign that she's avoiding you. I'm not sure I'd contact her again but if you do, then I would only do it once more. If you get another excuse, then I'd suggest stop talking to her. If she is playing games, that's too bad because it's kind of neat that she accidentally answered the ad and you knew one another.
Author theconsultant Posted July 30, 2008 Author Posted July 30, 2008 I've never used it but I guess she could be saying that to buy time. Or she really could be going out of town. Is there something in your past with her that would cause her to not want to go out with you? Did you just drift apart as friends or did somethihg negative happen? We drifted apart because of distance and our respective schedules got busy. But we did exchange the odd email once every couple of months. It's just really hard to say what's going on because I would not do this to someone. I wouldn't answer an ad and then take 2 days to answer back to someone I already knew. At best, I think her behavior is rude. And that may be a sign that she's avoiding you. She has always been very slow to write emails. We have probably exchanged a couple of dozen emails but I don't think she has ever given a same or next-day reply. And perhaps she checked her email only after seeing my text message. The other thing is, I gave her a clear exit door in my email. I ended my email with "I would love it if we can get together. But I will also totally understand if you aren't interested. Either ways I look forward to hearing from you!" I'm not sure I'd contact her again but if you do, then I would only do it once more. If you get another excuse, then I'd suggest stop talking to her. If she is playing games, that's too bad because it's kind of neat that she accidentally answered the ad and you knew one another. I'll wait a week to see if she writes an email. If not I'll send a final email. Any suggestions for content? Thanks very much!
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