Angel45 Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 I have been dating a man for the past 2 years... He was legally separated and in a middle of a divorce... and recently was finalized. I know that most of you would frown upon dating a man who is not fully divorced but that's not the reason for the post. I realize that it was a mistake... he has my heart... A few months ago, he went to the house (they both still own this house) and caught his soon to be ex and her boyfriend in their old bedroom... He lost his cool and hit the guy... When I found this out, I became very confused. But part of me understood that after being with someone for 20 years, there is a bond that takes time to heal. I broke up with him the next day after finding out. A few weeks later, we started dating again. Just yesterday, I asked him if given the chance, would you go back to your wife. He answered honestly and said yes... He said because of the kids and his family he would entertain the thought... Even if it was to let me go. Of course this broke my heart and although he said that would be unlikely, it still hurts. Today, all I've been doing is crying because I know that I have to let him go so that he may heal. I stepped in a relationship when I shouldn't and I feel as if my world is falling apart. We had so many plans before that evening. He even made a comment that he will not introduce me to his kids anytime soon. They've been apart and separated for so long and still feel as if I will be hidden if I stay with him. Please help me on how to handle this situation. Any prayers... suggestions... Thank you
Ronni_W Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Angel, I do offer prayers for you, and send you Angels to Comfort and Guide. You do have, it seems, an incredibly accurate picture of the situation. I am sure that it hurts like Hades. For what it's worth, and in my own philosophy and assessment, you did not do anything "wrong"...and neither did he. I suspect you both acted from honourable desires and intentions. Perhaps he consciously felt that he was further along in recovering from the complex emotional aspects of his separation/divorce. Perhaps he was in denial. Perhaps he was 'in hope'. I can only offer to not beat-up on yourself over your past actions. I am sure you will hear "you should have known better" and "serves you right". People who are capable of giving such messages are only confirming their own pain, anger and opportunity for self-healing and forgiveness. Do not mind them - send them Light, instead. God bless.
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