UT_longhorn Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Hello, I've been seeing this girl for about 2 weeks now, and we had sex about 1 1/2 weeks into seeing each other on our 3rd date. Personally I think its a little fast, but I think she is really into me, just by her body language and the way she is around me. I last saw her this past Saturday (3 days ago) and haven't talked to her since. I guess my question is...does having sex with a man change how a woman feel torwards him? Does that mean she is expressing a deeper connection with him? Or could it be that she just wanted to have physical pleasure. Also, she hasn't made any sort of contact so far since Saturday, and up till this point I've been the one to ask her 4 on dates (though she has initiated text conversations a few times). I was thinking about not calling her till she initiated something as far as the next date but should at this point Im a little confused as to if its still the man's job to do the pursuing? I'm just a retard at these dating matters and I guess I just need some advice.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Did she orgasm? If she didn't maybe she hadn't liked the sex.
bobdole Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 If you just had sex with her and haven't called / contacted her since then she is probably thinking you just wanted her for the sex and now you're done. If this isn't the case then you had better call her.
2sunny Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 you haven't contacted her? sheeez, you may have given her the idea that you were just using her for sex since you didn't call or send a note or a gift or something. make an effort! ANY effort. so she gets the idea that you care. unless - of course you really don't care.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Okay OP, what you're doing is basically what most guys are telling you to do, that dating is a two person game, so you're going to wait for her to pursue you. But you guys already had sex, so for you to start distancing yourself from her, you're making her feel that you just used her for a one night stand.
Virgo1982 Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 I think things should remain as they were before you had sex. Why would they change?
Phateless Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Sounds like you want a relationship with her? CALL HER and set up another date. She probably feels like she gave it up a little quickly and wants you to do some pursuing to validate her.
lovestruck818 Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 I know for me when I have sex with a guy it intensifies my feelings and connection to him greatly. Recently I have instituted a no-sex-until-were-exclusive policy b/c I have had sex with people in the past who never ended up becoming boyfriends and b/c of the intensified feelings, my heart was broken greatly. Always wise to wait, IMO. If you are interested in this girl for a girlfriend, call her. I guess most girls think the man should initiate contact, but I like to be the one in control so I usually do. if you want you can wait a little to see if you calls you but don't wait that long b/c then she might think you are uninterested. Good luck.
Author UT_longhorn Posted July 29, 2008 Author Posted July 29, 2008 i plan to call her tonight..but she has yet to contact me as well...so i just didnt want to seem so needy.
Shygirl15 Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Hello, I've been seeing this girl for about 2 weeks now, and we had sex about 1 1/2 weeks into seeing each other on our 3rd date. Personally I think its a little fast, but I think she is really into me, just by her body language and the way she is around me. I last saw her this past Saturday (3 days ago) and haven't talked to her since. I guess my question is...does having sex with a man change how a woman feel torwards him? Does that mean she is expressing a deeper connection with him? (IMO, YES) Or could it be that she just wanted to have physical pleasure (NO!) Also, she hasn't made any sort of contact so far since Saturday, and up till this point I've been the one to ask her 4 on dates -OF COURSE, YOU'RE A GUY-(though she has initiated text conversations a few times). I was thinking about not calling her till she initiated something as far as the next date (NOT A GOOD IDEA AT ALL) but should at this point Im a little confused as to if its still the man's job to do the pursuing?(YES!) I'm just a retard at these dating matters and I guess I just need some advice. You should have called her after the sex. I usually expect the guys to initiate contact after sex, really, it's the gentlemanly thing to do. Also, during inital stages of the dating, it's a man's job to pursue. Plus you'll come out looking bold and confident.
bobdole Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 You must have not had many relationships with girls, friend, intimate, or otherwise. Girls obsess about these things. Shes right now at this moment obsessing that you "screwed her and left her". If you want a relationship with this girl, call her as soon as you can.
Author UT_longhorn Posted July 29, 2008 Author Posted July 29, 2008 Thanks for all the replies/advice guys. I think I should call tonight. Ill let you know how it goes. You must have not had many relationships with girls, friend, intimate, or otherwise. Girls obsess about these things. Shes right now at this moment obsessing that you "screwed her and left her". If you want a relationship with this girl, call her as soon as you can. good point
whichwayisup Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Yes, the guy is supposed to call after having sex. Call her and ask her out again. (Also mention that you had a wonderful time with her!)
Keridan Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Yes, the guy is supposed to call after having sex. Call her and ask her out again. (Also mention that you had a wonderful time with her!) Unless you didnt! Then just shut your mouth
Phateless Posted July 29, 2008 Posted July 29, 2008 Tell her you want to see her again. Don't assume sex will happen again. If she seems like she wants to, definitely go ahead, but don't expect it or push for it. As I said, you waited 3 days to call, you don't want her to think that's the only thing you want from her. (unless that really is all you want from her.)
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