Thinking about transferring colleges--need insight

[user12]

I'm going into my junior year at a tiny --2000 students---private liberal arts college at the beach about 7 hours from where I grew up.

In my two years there, I have formed countless "friendships" with people that turn out to be completely void. I can't figure out if this school just appeals to a demographic of people that happen to have skewed perspectives on how friendship works or if the people I grew up with are just especially incredible people. I was EXTREMELY social in high school. I had so many friends I couldn't fit all my plans into my weekends, and I thought that college would be the same. Especially with all the hype society gives college--it's supposed to be the best time of your life, you'll form lifelong friendships, etc. And it's not as though I haven't completely put myself out there over and over. I'm very outgoing and I made lots of friends who just turned out to be really bad at being people and I just don't put up with that after a certain amount of craziness. The other issue is that the school has a rep for being a very relationship-oriented school, and it's completely valid. It's HARDLY an exaggeration to say that everyone I know is in a serious relationship and most of their time gets spent with the significant other. I haven't met any guys I want to be in relationships with, or maybe I'd be perfectly content sitting at home gazing into my lover's eyes every night. It seems everyone is either super super Christian and won't touch alcohol much less attend a party, or they are very trashy. I'm somewhere in between, and my friends at home were somewhere in between with me. I don't have sex and when I drink I usually don't like to lose my self control.

 

I don't know if it's necessary to get into all the sh%$ I dealt with the past two years to try and decide if maybe I'm just being too picky about how people treat me, but I feel as though I've had a pretty solid foundation of awesome longggg friendships from home as reference points.

 

At this school, I have two people I would call friends there, both boys that I go on crazy adventures with every night and do silly things that most people would consider way too immature or goofy when they could just go drink at a bar. But when those two weren't around I spent sooo many weekends sitting in my room crying this semester. Girls need girlfriends. I wish I was the type of person who could be content without social stimulation, but I feel like I'm wasting what are SUPPOSED to be the "best days of my life."

 

A lot of my friends from high school go to a huge university two hours from our hometown. It has 36,000 students in stark contrast to my school's population. I went to this school to get away from high school people and to make my own friends and be different, but maybe I should have just done what everyone else did.

 

The decision to transfer has been plaguing me all summer, ever since there was a huge blowup with my roommate that left me houseless last minute for next semester. It's a long awful story, but I ended up deciding to go back and change my whole schedule to prerequisites for the university so I can transfer in the spring if I want to, or stay at my school if things end up being okay. I just feel like I really put my all into my school, and I'm not sure if I'm expecting too much. I LOVE the town and the thought of leaving these two friends tears me up, but I don't know if I'm expecting too much out of college. Everyone says, you're at the beach in this gorgeous tourist town! You should be so happy! The professors in my major aren't great, but I have lots of leadership opportunities in the organizations I'm involved in because the school is so small.

 

If I transfer to the university, I will lose a lot of credits and start out as a sophomore again graduating a year late. I'm not too concerned about this. I'm more concerned that transferring won't change anything and I'll still be unhappy but I'll have to deal with all the endlessly stressful shenannigans that goes along with switching schools--physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I'm not concerned much with the education part of the decision as silly as that sounds. I'm a PR major and I think that where I'll be in 10 years won't really be affected by where I went to school; internships are much more important in this field I've heard.

 

If you actually read all that, wow THANK YOU!! I just want to know what people think, if anyone transferred schools especially from a very big or very small school to its opposite, and if my reasoning is sound.

[BklynGuy]

To me, it sounds like you're torn. You're not in YOUR ideal environment, but there are several pros to the school you are attending. Only you can make the choice that is best for you.

 

I can relate to you on a personal level though. I don't "fit" properly at the college I've been attending. I'm a junior as are you, and am attending a new school for the summer. I'm really liking this school and am thinking about transferring but I don't have the prereq's to do that now. I don't want to stay where I am but may have to.

 

If transferring will give you the right balance you need in your life, I'd say go for it. Just take your time and think before you make your final decision.

[user12]

It's true but I would rather pay someone to make it for me and somehow convince me 100% that that's the right way to go. That's interesting that you're thinking of transferring so late too. Junior year...it's like..whats the point really?

Thanks for responding !