Ronni_W Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 You cant invite a man to your home and then MAKE him watch some tv garbage. That just comes off as a bitch with a control problem. If it is a 'new' relationship, I totally agree with you. But after 18 months, they may well be at the stage where they do need/want to start to get a glimpse of how things will 'trend', the further along they take their relationship. In the OP's friend's case, for me the red flag is that he will consciously try to disrupt her viewing pleasure...THAT is a much more serious control (and self-control) issue, IMO. That said, I have been in the 'new' relationship stage where I got to watch an awful lot of "Monday Night Football" and "Saturday Night Hockey" -- I was okay watching BUT when he started wanting me to understand why and how of the 'Hail Mary' and whatever...well, I did "just say no" to that! (Point here being that this type of behaviour/expectation is not restricted to one or another gender, in my own experience.)
woods321 Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 Why do women want to pussify men? I mean come on. A man comes to your home to see you, and then you expect him, and want to make him watch something on tv that he doesn't want to? Yes, men like sports. I guess life is not fair. Maybe allow the man to watch what he wants. Life isn't easy for men, can they at least have that pleasure?
Ariadne Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 The thing is that he lays on her bed watching what he wants to watch as she sits alone in the other room watching her programme. Oh, the sight... Had plenty of that with my previous marriages. Usually spread out, with the legs opened the size of the bed and farting away. Really will have to consider getting married again . I'd say most men are like that though. If your friends wants a guy she'll have to deal with that.
Storyrider Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 Tell her to rent something sexy that they can both enjoy, and hopefully by the middle of it, the TV will be off or providing encouraging background noise.
JohnnyBlaze Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 My question really was is this a red flag in general? At that point in the relationship, I'd say no. They've been together for a year and a half now, so they are probably hitting that 'comfort' zone. They just don't like the same shows; there's nothing wrong with that. If I found a chick that liked the same shows I do, I'd probably be more than a little worried about her! I don't put up with watching shows I hate anymore; regardless of how long I've been seeing a girl. If I come over unannounced and her favourite show is on, I'll go web surfing for an hour, or go out or read a book or something. But if she invites me over and then insists I watch her favourite show, knowing that I can't stand it, well, that's just rude. I don't call a chick up saying "hey honey; get your ass over here! The Dallas/Pittsburgh game is starting!", so don't expect me to sit idly while Oprah's latest guest snivels that her mommy didn't hold her tight enough, or held her too tight, or whatever the problem is. I couldn't care less, and if forced to watch it, I'll gladly and openly say as much. That said, I have been in the 'new' relationship stage where I got to watch an awful lot of "Monday Night Football" and "Saturday Night Hockey" -- I was okay watching BUT when he started wanting me to understand why and how of the 'Hail Mary' and whatever...well, I did "just say no" to that! (Point here being that this type of behaviour/expectation is not restricted to one or another gender, in my own experience.) Me and an ex dealt with that very issue. I'm a football fan (CFL and NFL) and she's a hockey fan (NHL). We came up with a great system. She got weekdays (usually when hockey's played) and I got weekends (when football's on). If her favourite team was playing on a football day, as long as my favourite team wasn't playing at the same time, she'd get the clicker, and afterwards I'd be compensated by 'other' means. I was SO happy for weekend hockey games! Like others have said, compromise!
bobdole Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 My girl and I have a similar problem. She likes to watch reality shows (American dance crew, idol, tia tequilla, rock of love, ect) and I find the shows bordering on repulsive. Not the because of any disagreement with any content, just the pointless mindless drivel that they are. Any show I watch has to have a plot or a point. I enjoy shows like prison break, house md, various sci-fi shows, news on occasion, ect. She enjoys most of my shows (won't touch any sci-fi due to some mental stigma that she says she'll be a nerd if she watches it and enjoys it.. whatever), but I can't stand most of "hers". When she watches her shows, I'll do one of 3 things. I either get out my laptop and play something/surf/watch something, go upstairs and watch something else myself, or go do something productive (clean/cook/yard work/errands). I know she loves her shows and I love her so I just work around them for her. It occasionally causes problems and makes us sad that we have dissimilar tastes, but we've always gotten over it and have been going on for ~1.5 years now.
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