I still love him to death but i just want the man that i had know for two months back

[engrider]

My boyfriend and I have been together for two months so far. We met through a friend and hit it off. The past two months were so perfect and great it was almost sickening. I really didn't let him know too many of my feelings because im afraid of getting hurt again. On the other side he would tell me that i was like his best friend that he could tell me anything and hes so relaxed around me. We would talk about one day moving in together and joke around about saying the "L" word but it was all in fun joking. We had alot of fun together and did a lot of stuff and planed a lot of stuff. All of our friends go along it was great!!! Then a almost two weeks ago i stopped in and chaated with his mom for a lil he had to go to work gave me a kiss and a hug and he went off to work. That was the last time i talked to him. He hasn't called me since. I tried calling, I stopped in last week and we barely said two words to each other. I was so nervous, scared, and confused i didn't know what to say. After last week i haven't called or stopped by. I did give in and called tonight but no one answered. I really want to stop in on wed and see if we even still together. I have a gut feeling that we are and that he is going through some personal problems right now which i can understand but I just don't know. From what i know of him and what he has told me its one of two things or it could be both. He is very stressed out about some personal problems and he needs to straighten them out and/or he truley fell in love with me and is scared to fall in love. This is so confusing to me I still love him to death but i just want the man that i had know for two months back in my life. I have talked to his bros and they don't even know whats going on wirth him????? I'm just so confused on what tio think??????

[clia]

If he hasn't called you in two weeks, I'm pretty sure your relationship is over. (Sorry.)

 

He is very stressed out about some personal problems and he needs to straighten them out and/or he truley fell in love with me and is scared to fall in love.

 

Or, he no longer wants to see you.

 

I'm sorry, but even if he were going through personal issues right now, don't you think he'd at least call and explain that to you if he were worried about losing you? Even if he is scared to fall in love, don't you think he'd still in some way maintain contact with you?

 

He hasn't done anything toward you in two weeks. That's two weeks out of an eight week long relationship. 1/4 of your relationship. Cut your losses, preserve your dignity, and move on. Don't call and don't stop in. Yes, it's crappy that he "poofed" without a word, but this does happen, and not infrequently.

[my_mother's_daughter]

Sorry, but I'm totally with Clia on this one. It hurts, I know, but he seems to be totally avoiding you, and men (in new relationships anyway) usually do this for one reason only: They want to end it.

 

Move on, if you can feel so strongly for this guy after 2 months then you will find it again with someone else. Don't upset yourself remembering the things he said and torturing yourself with the good old "it just doesn't make any sense". He changed his mind. People do that: it sucks, but they do.

[engrider]

Today was my day off so I stoped by to see what was going on. He was already sitting outside and i walked up to him and said that he was sorry for not calling and that he is just not ready to be in a relationship right now I wasn't hurt or upset i knew what was coming and I just told him that it was fine and then we changed the subject. We sat there talking for about two hours just like old friends catching up on the past two weeks and so on. He said that he would take me out 4 my birthday this weekend cause my birthday was last week and he was such a dick to me on my birthday. He apologized for everything and we still have our friendship. Which in the long run that could end up with us getting together. We made plans to go away and he told me today that he will still go with me. So i am not going to give up on him i think that hes just scared to be comitted right now, his ex of 6 years really messed his mind up. I also have things that i need to get straightened out too so its kind of good that we are just friends for now. Hes a really cool guy and hes one of a kind I still Love him!!!

[clia]

He apologized for everything and we still have our friendship. Which in the long run that could end up with us getting together.

 

Don't get your hopes up.

 

Remember, he said this:

 

he is just not ready to be in a relationship right now

 

He is not lying to you. He rejected you.

 

The reason you are not hurt or upset is because you are clinging to the hope that your "friendship" (were you friends with him before you started dating or did you just meet him two months ago?) will turn into something else. Unfortunately, it will not. He has told you he does not want a relationship. No person in their right mind says that to someone they are interested in having a relationship with.

 

i think that hes just scared to be comitted right now, his ex of 6 years really messed his mind up.

 

Do not make excuses for his behavior. He has rejected you. Might I remind you that this guy disappeared on you? The only reason you are now "friends" with him is because you went over to his house. If you had not done that, he clearly had no intention of retaining your friendship. Doesn't that tell you anything? He was perfectly happy to "poof" out of your life.

 

I wish you the best and hope I'm wrong, but I have been in your shoes. I seriously doubt this is going to be the future fairytale you envision it to be. I strongly encourage you to move on and date other men. If you want to see him from time to time, fine, but don't see him only in the hopes that he will change his mind and want to be with you. I truly have never seen that happen.