xpaperxcutx Posted July 25, 2008 Posted July 25, 2008 I just don't understand it. After you've dated for said years and have said many times of sex, you break up and and still manage to become friends? How does that even work? I read on here people still managing to become friends with their exes. I find that somewhat ironic if you harbor feelings for the other person. How can you stand to even be in the same room as the person that had once seen you naked?
JustinWolf Posted July 25, 2008 Posted July 25, 2008 Sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't. I'm friend with one of my ex and well I'm pretty sure the feelings are still there. So, how to do it? Well it's simple, wait-- that's a good question. I don't even know myself.
northstar1 Posted July 25, 2008 Posted July 25, 2008 I just don't understand it. After you've dated for said years and have said many times of sex, you break up and and still manage to become friends? How does that even work? I read on here people still managing to become friends with their exes. I find that somewhat ironic if you harbor feelings for the other person. How can you stand to even be in the same room as the person that had once seen you naked? It can happen, after a period of time - for most we are talking years. At some point, those feeligns will dissapate for most. If they don't, then friendship is not a good idea.
Author xpaperxcutx Posted July 25, 2008 Author Posted July 25, 2008 It can happen, after a period of time - for most we are talking years. At some point, those feeligns will dissapate for most. If they don't, then friendship is not a good idea. Yeah but what's the possibility of that happening? Most people have no choice if they have mutual friends, but if that weren't the case, would anyone willingly extend the olive branch to the other?
kizik Posted July 25, 2008 Posted July 25, 2008 It's always a bad idea to rush into the friend thing. People say let's be friends as a way to soften the blow. Very quickly both parties realize how painful it is to attempt. Like North said, we're talking years. My ex ex emailed me and I offered friendship, but she ignored me. Whatever. Same old Maggie. Point is that I was totally ready for a friendship.. but that's b/c it had been 5 years.
northstar1 Posted July 25, 2008 Posted July 25, 2008 Yeah but what's the possibility of that happening? Most people have no choice if they have mutual friends, but if that weren't the case, would anyone willingly extend the olive branch to the other? I think it depends on the reason of the breakup. Cheating cuts deep, so why would many ever want to offer trust or friendship to them. Those who brokeup because feelings changed, or because of distance or whatever, there is a possibility to have a friendship, AFTER both have moved on and no longer carry feelings or resentment. But again, I think we are talking years, not weeks/months. But everyone is different.
sultry33 Posted July 26, 2008 Posted July 26, 2008 I just don't understand it. After you've dated for said years and have said many times of sex, you break up and and still manage to become friends? How does that even work? I read on here people still managing to become friends with their exes. I find that somewhat ironic if you harbor feelings for the other person. How can you stand to even be in the same room as the person that had once seen you naked? once you have moved on an no longer want them.. fancy them i think you can be friends otherwise its just going hurt;)
celinedion1 Posted July 27, 2008 Posted July 27, 2008 My ex and i are best friends. However even though we're friends we both think that we'll end up togther and want to be together just not now. The feelings are still there however they just get pushed away/ignored/not thought about. Whenever my ex and I hang out I dont think about the past, and the relationship that we had. I dont think about the cheating and the pain that was caused. I dont see him nor is he the same person who I fell in love with. When he acts like the person who he used to be then thats when it hurts, however I push it out of my mind then cry about it later when hes not around. I'm able to be friends with my ex but in all honestly its not easy. Whenever he gets stressed out or angry he takes it out on me I become the person who he vents on. Never physical always just yelling and screaming. I kow that he has issues with needing to learn how to control his stress and act more mature. I also know that he takes it out on me because im the closest person to him and I dont take it personally cause I know that its not he just has some things that he needs to get help with. I also know that even though he sometimes lets the stress get the best of him with the yelling and the cursing, that he really does love and care about me deeply and I him. Whenever he gets stressed out I just let him be and then after a few hours hes nice and kind again. So as for being friends with your ex its not easy all the time but for my ex and I we get along a lot better now and are a lot happier now than we were before. We both love that we have a great friendship and we both dont want to lose it.
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