depressed

[Peter_pan]

ok ive had a few drinks and im missing my ex. not in a sexual way or anything. just a few memories etc have got me reminded how we used to be, and how she understood me better than anyone. and how we where a massive part of each others younger life.

 

i feel HORRIBLE that we dont talk anymore. and that i havnt seen or heard from her for over half a year,

 

its not my fault she dated someone right away and one could argue she left me for him. but still. i find it totally strange how she can ignore me and not get in contact.

 

we had names for each other etc. it hurts so bad

 

 

. majorly upset

[northstar1]

ok ive had a few drinks and im missing my ex. not in a sexual way or anything. just a few memories etc have got me reminded how we used to be, and how she understood me better than anyone. and how we where a massive part of each others younger life.

 

i feel HORRIBLE that we dont talk anymore. and that i havnt seen or heard from her for over half a year,

 

its not my fault she dated someone right away and one could argue she left me for him. but still. i find it totally strange how she can ignore me and not get in contact.

 

we had names for each other etc. it hurts so bad

 

 

. majorly upset

 

You are certainly not alone. I feel the same way.

 

But a word of advice is to avoid drinking much these days. All booze does(esp if you're alone) is to depress you and bring feelings to the surface.

[Peter_pan]

i know, booze ent good. but i was out with loads of mates. i got depressed and it went from there.

 

i sometimes think maybe she is sad about losing me

 

she did say when we broke up that i could call her anytime and no matter where she was in the world.

 

all BS really. specially as she went out with a PRICK.

 

i want to speak to her and make sure she is ok. i feel like a twat for ignoring her and leaving her be.

 

she will probably never speak to me again since i blanked her as soon as i found out about "mr new guy"

 

argh. so pissed off.

[northstar1]

i know, booze ent good. but i was out with loads of mates. i got depressed and it went from there.

 

i sometimes think maybe she is sad about losing me

 

she did say when we broke up that i could call her anytime and no matter where she was in the world.

 

all BS really. specially as she went out with a PRICK.

 

I'm sure she does think about you, but you can't dwell on that.

 

At this point, the less you know about her life, the better.

 

You're a good man, and you'll soon find someone new to replace the ex, and all those thoughts and emotions you are experiencing will begin to reduce, replaced by you forming positive new memories from the next relationship you are in.

 

I think back to one of my bad breakups from years ago. At the time, I was devastated, thought I'd never get over her, never find someone else.

Ofcourse, I did - and now I only look back with complete lack of negative emotion.

 

You'll get there, just believe in you.

[Peter_pan]

thanks mateyx

 

i get so stressed out its unreal. i feel so suicidal sometimes (yes i know that wont solve anything)

 

there is a song by snow patrol called grazed knees, that makes me want to cry my eyes out. i listened to it whilst she told me she didnt want me

 

and even to this day i cry when i hear it. it reminds me of the trip back to my home at christmas. i knew it was all to late

[ioncebelieved]

I'm sure she does think about you, but you can't dwell on that.

 

 

 

 

I think back to one of my bad breakups from years ago. At the time, I was devastated, thought I'd never get over her, never find someone else.

Ofcourse, I did - and now I only look back with complete lack of negative emotion.

 

You'll get there, just believe in you.

 

Funny how the past can come back after you thought it never could!!! This time has been the hardest ever for me and I do not think I could go through another one of these. Bout damn near killed me!!!

 

Now I see why some shut down and put up walls.

[northstar1]

thanks mateyx

 

i get so stressed out its unreal. i feel so suicidal sometimes (yes i know that wont solve anything)

 

there is a song by snow patrol called grazed knees, that makes me want to cry my eyes out. i listened to it whilst she told me she didnt want me

 

and even to this day i cry when i hear it. it reminds me of the trip back to my home at christmas. i knew it was all to late

 

you need to get rid of that song

[Peter_pan]

ffs why did i let her go out with him. i could have punched him up.

 

i miss her so much. i miss us.

 

all this time i was kidding myself she would come back. she hasnt even contacted me let alone ****ing getting back with me.

 

its not fair. i should have been better, recovered from my illness. i let it get out of control. and some prick ended up being with her. and now im left haunted at everything.

 

she was my first. no one forgets there first.

[D-Lish]

I am sorry you are having a rough go of it.

It's true- we seldom forget our first love... but we do recover from the pain.

 

I still think about my first love- but it's with indifference now.

 

You'll get to that place where it ceases to cause you pain.

 

I've been one to drown my sorrows in alcohol, but it only makes me feel worse afterward.

 

I dated someone who broke my heart and I thought I'd never get over him... we didn't speak for a year after breaking up and then decided to meet for dinner.... I sat across from him and felt nothing- I just kept looking at him and trying to figure out what it was I had seen in him.

 

You have to stop blaming yourself for the break up so you can really get down to healing. Internalizing all that blame will just eat you up inside.

 

You'll find that same spark and chemistry with someone else one day.

[replicator]

ffs why did i let her go out with him. i could have punched him up.

 

i miss her so much. i miss us.

 

all this time i was kidding myself she would come back. she hasnt even contacted me let alone ****ing getting back with me.

 

its not fair. i should have been better, recovered from my illness. i let it get out of control. and some prick ended up being with her. and now im left haunted at everything.

 

she was my first. no one forgets there first.

 

Peter,

 

I can relately too closely to your feelings. I'm not a big James Blunt fan, but when I hear some of his songs I listened to during the times of our break up, I feel like dying. Somehow I end up listening to him once in a while when I'm thinking about her. I must be a glutton for pain.

 

It isn't easy to forget someone you really loved.. It isn't easy to accept that she rejected you for someone else. You know to yourself, and you believe so strongly that you loved her, and you were the best for her. You wonder if you had done that one thing, or you didn't say those words, how things would be now. You feel as though you could have stopped things, and it would all be different.

 

The truth is, it happened. She made her choice. Love is an action, and she made her choice. Someone who loves you, wouldn't leave you for someone else. You don't want someone like this.. You deserve better. It's ok to feel sad, but don't linger on it. I know there isn't much anyone can say when you have that kind of pain. It swallows you up, and sometimes you need to wait until some more time passes.

[Peter_pan]

thanks guys i know you are right. ugh its hard though and yeaH no one said it was or would be easy.

 

i just miss her alot. and there is nothing i can do about it. i wish she realised what a mistake it was to have done what she did.

 

i wish she missed me and would be sorry.

 

here is me all sad and upset, when she probably has a new bf after the one she left me for now.....

 

i never thought it would be like this between us. i never thought it would end like this

[roghornio]

Hey there. The ups and downs...

 

I used to get real upset if i had been drinking, unfotunaatly it manifetsed itself in rude, drunken and sometimes violent behaviour. NOt attractive and certainly not healthy going down that road. Your time will come and it will start to pass... My first girlfriend took me a year to get over and i thought the depression cloud would never go away... but it did, i look back and laugh at how upset i was, and to think it;s happened twice again, each time i think "oh dear, i will never find another blah blah" and each time i think back and remember how bad it was the first time (that was the worst for sure) and know that it did pass with time, and i did meet somone else (well several over the years), and each one gets better (more suited, and prettier!!) EVERYTIME.

 

All you can do buddy is hang on and ride it out. Get out there and live your life. Meet new people. I can GUARANTEE you will find someone infantly better suited for you - you wont belive me.. but you will

 

i thought you had hooked up with a new girl?

[Peter_pan]

 

thanks man. i appreciate ur words v much.

 

erm yeah i am going to ask her to come out with me next week. see what she says. she said that yesterday she had training. and i didnt see her out just her sister. so i guess she is genuine when she said that.

 

i think i am doing all the chasing, but girls like that dont they?

[roghornio]

 

thanks man. i appreciate ur words v much.

 

erm yeah i am going to ask her to come out with me next week. see what she says. she said that yesterday she had training. and i didnt see her out just her sister. so i guess she is genuine when she said that.

 

i think i am doing all the chasing, but girls like that dont they?

 

you worry too much

Give her the benefit of the doubt this time...

If she gives you an excuse next time well then you know your getting brushed off. Dont get in touch with her for a couple days - maybe sunday evening - ask how her weekend was and if shes free in the week...

[Meaplus3]

ok ive had a few drinks and im missing my ex. not in a sexual way or anything. just a few memories etc have got me reminded how we used to be, and how she understood me better than anyone. and how we where a massive part of each others younger life.

 

i feel HORRIBLE that we dont talk anymore. and that i havnt seen or heard from her for over half a year,

 

its not my fault she dated someone right away and one could argue she left me for him. but still. i find it totally strange how she can ignore me and not get in contact.

 

we had names for each other etc. it hurts so bad

 

 

. majorly upset

 

I'm sorry your hurting I do understand how your feeling. I realize it's tough to let go of someone that you felt a great connection with however, sometimes things work out this way. They say times does heal all wounds.. try and believe that. Hang in there.

 

AP:)

[Peter_pan]

thanks for your support Meaplus3, i am still struggling on. i feel i wont meet someone that is more attractive than she was. how many natural blondes are there? exactly.

 

i have started a new job and it going well, i have made loads of connections and broadened my circle of friends.

 

it can only surely be a matter of time before someone sweeps me off my feet?

 

i still miss the ex and wonder if we will ever talk again, or if she regrets going out with mr rebound.

 

xx

[roghornio]

So you equate natural blondes to beauty?

You have a lot to learn young man So many to choose from

 

 

And yeah your right – every day that passes is a day closer to your next girlfriend… she could walk through the door tonight, tomorrow, next week – you just don’t know! So stop worrying and get out there... the more you broaden your social horizons the more chance you have of meeting someone.

[FONT=&quot]

So many months have passed now with your ex – this sounds harsh, but you know aswell as I do she ain’t coming back. So you really have to stop worrying about what she is up to and who with – its none of your concern anymore.

 

[/FONT]

[Peter_pan]

no not really, i was more implying that i was lucky...

 

yeh many months have passed. i know she isn't coming back. im not holding onto that anymore.

 

what does upset me is that we couldn't be friends and that she didnt want me. also that she hasnt contacted me. although she has asked about me through mutual friends.

 

she made up her mind she didnt want me back then, and she obviously dosnt want me now, even though she has had someone to compare me to.

 

(at the time she said she wasnt comparing anything we had with him....)

 

god how can she be so sure on what she was doing. so selfish

 

 

and another thing, i have had offers by two girls but im just not into them in that way ....

[roghornio]

Hey Pete. I’ve been out with blondes, brunettes and everything in between…

Maybe its something all men go through I dunnno – but yeah I used to be a blonde man.. not anymore. Black hair does it for me these days!

I think it may have been a visit to Barcelona – god damn are those Catlonian girls hot!!!!

 

I understand about the friends thing Pete – but you know, you couldn’t handle it.

You would never have gotten over her is she had stuck around. Think about…

Just because she int getting in touch doesn’t mean she doesn’t think about you – she has a life and its keeping her busy.

As you said she is with someone else – now, if I ever meet someone the last person I am going to be chasing up and looking to talk to is my ex –whether I got dumped or was the dumper!!!!!

 

The two girls – well count yourself lucky… and they certainly won’t be the last to show some interest.

 

It’s hard I know – the best advice and you’ve heard it a million times is keep busy and work on improving yourself so you’re ready for the next one whenever they arrive. Absolutely nothing you can do to bring your old one back, or even for that little crumb of hope she might give you is she emailed or texted you – the only person entertaining these thoughts is you, if you want to stay down there then ok – but only you can bring you up!!

Put it this way Pete – if she did phone or text or email and said Hi, how are you… what are you going to gain from that… you reply back saying life is grand (its not), blah blah, speak you soon. Then nothing… your back to square one. Nothing she will/would say to you will make you feel better IN FACT anything good or bad she has to say will make you sad again.

 

Your doing great on the lady front my friend… keep dating… one day sometime one of them will just click.

[sedgwick]

thanks for your support Meaplus3, i am still struggling on. i feel i wont meet someone that is more attractive than she was. how many natural blondes are there? exactly.

 

Really? That's all it takes to make a guy fall in love with you? Blonde hair? Damn, and here I thought personality or brains mattered. Silly me!

[Peter_pan]

Really? That's all it takes to make a guy fall in love with you? Blonde hair? Damn, and here I thought personality or brains mattered. Silly me!

 

she was very clever cute and funny and very supportive actually.

 

rog, she isnt with him anymore. whether she is single or not im not sure.

i'll reply to you later rog, ive got to go to work now. thanks guys

[Peter_pan]

i guess your right about the she probably thinks about me thing, but yeh she will be busy and dosnt have to think of me. for all i know she is hung up on her ex, the one after me.

 

i just dont know. yeh i couldnt handle it you are right. it would have been hell staying in touch knowing she isnt with me anymore and was seeing him.

 

all i know is she defiantly broke up with him, wether they are now together again is unknown.

 

i feel that contact with her probably would get her back. if she isnt with him, it wouldn't be that difficult to go back out? although it in itself would be impossible probably.