xxdarlingxx Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 i need some help and i really dont know where to go for it. I broke up with my love about 6 months ago. He was perfect, gorgeous, loving... everything i could have ever asked for =( We always spoke about our feelings and how we promised to be together forever. But there was always mention if we didnt last that he would move on and find another girl and deep inside that did hurt me because i knew i would love him forever and i still do. I havent ever told him the real reason i left but i dont think it matters anymore =( He has a new gf and they say they love each other. I will never love another person again he is my love and i wish i never hurt him. I found out i have an aggressive case of cancer and after being with him so long i saw how much he dependend on me how much he needed me there and i got scared of how much it would hurt him if something bad happened to me. How he wouldnt be able to cope watching me slowly deteriate and then ending up all alone... my life was perfect and now it is very very sad. I guess i should be happy though because this is what i wanted i wanted him to have someone forever ... and that cant be me... we had so many dreams and i just wish i could have lived them with him. My beautiful love thinks i left him for another guy which is very far from the truth, he calls me words i dont want to say and if only he knew what was happening, i love him so dearly i just wish i could be in his arms one last time
justaman99 Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 Why not be honest with him? Why have him think you broke his heart by leaving him for another man? Don't leave things unsaid and life's too short not to be open and honest with someone you care about. I wish you well in health and in love, -Just
whichwayisup Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 I am sorry to hear that you have cancer. LS is very supportive so if you need to vent about your feelings, we'll all listen and try to help. I agree with justaman - Tell him what's what. It will make you feel better, just speak from your heart.
Keridan Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 I just wanted to put in one more vote for telling him the truth. It might make you both feel better. I know I would rather be with my wife for a few months watching her die than think she left me for another person. Of course, I would rather spend 3 months with her than the rest of my life with anyone else. Even more important, I wanted to say that I'm sorry as well for your pain and what you are going through. It's incredibly hard and I would never wish it on anyone to go through it alone. I wish there were proper words of comfort. I hope things get better for you!
Lovelybird Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 yes, I think it is good to tell him the truth. and please get your fight back, cancer can be healed. there are many those stories out there did you ever read Dodie Osteen's book Healed of Cancer? she got cancer, doctor said she would die in few weeks, but she believed in God, and cancer got healed by God, she is still very much alive today ! Check it out if you want to, she got lots of fight in her. Good luck and best wishes
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 Cancer-wise - what type of cancer do you have? Have you gotten your survival rates based on treatment plans from your oncologist and/or oncologic surgeon? Boy-wise - Take it from me: relationship/love/etc. type stuff, particularly if it is not of the happy sort is not the sort of thing you need draining you right now. It made things far worse for me. Take what you have inside: the angst, the worry, the sadness, the heartbreak, and the hurt and focus it into something akin to anger. Use that anger to fight against this cancer that interrupted your life and messed up your happiness. Don't be sad. Sad will not help you heal or get better or even give you a fighting chance. Sadness leads to despair, and despair can lead you right into the finite path of 'giving up'. If you feel anything, try to let it be anger and determination. Something that clears a path forward for you. If you haven't started treatments yet I can understand how you are feeling, but trust me - you want to go in and stay in fighting hard once those treatments start. As for your boyfriend... tell him. Wouldn't you want him to do the same for you? Now is not the time for martyrdom. You need all the help and support you can get, and even if he can't be there for you as a boyfriend you will definitely need him there as a friend.
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