bish Posted August 15, 2008 Posted August 15, 2008 You shouldnt be pissed. You deceived her first. You're pissed about how she's lying now.. can you imagine how she's feeling right now?? I agree. He has absolutely no right to be pissed at her. Thats rich. He cheats on her, then is pissed because of how she is reacting to his betrayal of her?
Author Tripped up Posted August 15, 2008 Author Posted August 15, 2008 Bish, It was simply a reaction at the time I found out. Like I said I kept calm and remained that way. Was simply trying to portray my feelings is all. I understand that I did wrong, which is why I never said anything about it. That is why I come here and post, to get these feelings out. I am not out to blame her for anything, just posting and trying to make sense of things inside myself. It is a huge lesson learned, but still painful for me as well. I feel that posting and talking about it helps me move forward and understand the pains that were caused on both sides. Knowing that and growing from it WILL make things easier in the future.
rstratt2 Posted August 16, 2008 Posted August 16, 2008 Too bad. Time to move on. Don't try to justify it. It's your mistake, you live with it. The story of your life will be a boring read if you don't make some mistakes.
Author Tripped up Posted August 17, 2008 Author Posted August 17, 2008 I meant to post this here: We were supposed to see each other today. Instead we spoke about how she needs time for herself and cannot heal or focus on herself when I am around. She says I tend to just confuse her more and more. So I have decided to do the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Let her go. I love her, and I believe its best for her. I write sometimes....just my thoughts and emotions. Kinda let everything just pour out. Below is what I wrote while grinding the decision in my head. It helped put what I should do in perspective. Day 1 NC starts now. Have you ever had something so wonderful, so meaningful or so extraordinary that you have no idea why you were blessed with what you have?? I have. I was blessed with an incredible girlfriend whom I loved dearly. She had it all, looks, personality, and a great mind and soul. I had never connected with someone on a level like her. Simply put, she was the most intriguing person I have ever met, and I loved her and respected her for that. So why do things not work out like you think they should? Man, thats the million dollar question right there. Why do people do things they do? Can people make mistakes and recover from them? Can such a wonderful thing survive ups and downs?? Does love conquer all? Maybe love isnt enough all the time.......but it sure as hell is a good start! So when do you let go of something so dear to you?? How do you determine what is right and what is wrong? I figured out the answer to that question today. When you truly love someone, you do what is best for them. No matter how hard, or how much you will miss them, you have to let them go. It's not easy, in fact its the hardest thing anyone will ever have to do. Loving someone involves putting thier needs before yours. I made my mistake with that one time, but have always done for her what I thought best. There isnt any reason for this to be any different. It's saying "I love you" without ever saying the words.
brightskies Posted August 17, 2008 Posted August 17, 2008 Hi Tripped, Sorry to hear that you're hurting. I'm female and have been in your ex-gf's place. Her confusion, her ups and downs, are all par for the course. Continue with no contact to allow both of you to heal. Vivrantflo said it best: ... Bro, she's done. She still loves you, and is still attached to you, and is hurting very much ... but she knows she can't trust you again, and is finding it hard to let you go for good. You should stop persuing [sic] her cause it's gonna be too emotionally draining for both of you. Leave her alone, she's done. Now she doesn't respect you anymore ... The relationship is too damaged. Sorry man ... The trust is broken, and there's nothing to hold you two together.. love is NOT enough in this situation. Trust me, I know. Dude, just leave her alone ... just leave her to herself to sort out her feelings. ... Take this as a lesson learned and move on. It's going to hurt like hell for a long time, but you did the right thing by letting her go. It's the right thing for both of you. For future reference: remember how you lost her, remember self-control, and don't ever again squander your future partner's love, trust, and respect. When you love someone, there's far too much at stake to give in to the demands of hormones or alcohol. Keep your eyes on the prize.
bish Posted August 18, 2008 Posted August 18, 2008 So when do you let go of something so dear to you?? The day you didn't care enough about them to keep from cheating on them.
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