djash85 Posted July 22, 2008 Posted July 22, 2008 hey first timer on here...so mybad in further posts.... okay i met this girl through a friend she was living in central america most of her teen life but was born here in the states, she moved here almost a year ago and i met her through my friend almost 5-6 months ago the first few months were great! we kept going out all the time! we both had a connection because we would tell each other things that we would not tell others. during us going out we started holding hands at times like at clubs random events doing basic interactions, at first many of my friends especially the girls would ask me are you guys going out? im like no..then they would reply well honestly you guys act like your going out. about a month ago i decided to lay down the cards. i was thinking about when should i do it but the thing is i was kinda forced into it...a friend of mine was drunk and started saying to her that i liked her etc...so she asked about it and i told her that i like her and i was very interested...but also told her that i dont want to put her in position were she had to choose and make her feel uncomfortable. after our conversation she explained she got out of a 7 year relationship which i totally understand i was in a four year relationship. she explained that she was confused, and explained that she knew that i liked her. but she never really said anything she just said if it happens, it happens. so after that conversation, we still continued to go out and enjoy our time together. also she just got hired at job so at times we wouldnt be able to go out cuz we were both tired from work but at times we would go out on the weekend. till recently she became good friends with some girls at her job and they started taking her out which doesnt matter to me i wasnt mad at that but even if they went out she would always hit me up during texting.. okay till recently june the calls started getting less at time sometimes she would call me till after a day or two..but till recently in july it was her bday and she went out with her friends which i didnt mind. but the next two days we made plans together which were great we celebrated her bday she invited me to her bbq i was the only guy there and the rest were family and the girls and of course i met her friends that she goes out with etc... either way during getting to know everyone ive caught her many times staring at me ive caught her looking and she would smile honestly im thinking maybe she wants make a relationship with me i dont know but after the bbq i went to her house and we were together the whole day through the whole night. and we were talking alot just about random things etc..till now i was rarely getting calls from her and i would call her once n a while and ask her how she was doing etc.. and i would try to make plans with her but then recently she hasnt called me i would call her up or hit her up on messenger we would talk and she tell me she with her friends but some how would keep the conversation short.... till now she wouldnt call i called on saturday to say hit whats up whats been going? she would reply nothings wrong just ive been hanging around with her friends but the tone of her voice i felt like she was hiding something...so from here i dont know whats going on...should i stop calling i dont want to call her and keep asking her out i think it would be kinda clingy so should i just wait? i know its kinda of confusing but this is my first time....thanks for the advice everyone... p.s. i really like this girl but it confuses me at times is that every time we hang out we would always interact with each other like if we were a couple and at times she would play hard to get...i dont mind the game i just really dont know how read her at times...also i havent even kissed this girl yet...thanks for the advice in advance
bigmanpayne Posted July 22, 2008 Posted July 22, 2008 not to be harsh, but maybe she really isnt in to you? maybe there is somebody else and thats why you guys arent in contact much anymore. she would have gone ahead and been with you once you brought it to her attention, plus she knows that you like her - so if she wanted to take things further she would have. cut your losses and ignore her, if she wants something with you then believe me she will let you know. the ignoring thing works my man.
Author djash85 Posted July 23, 2008 Author Posted July 23, 2008 no its okay no harm intended honestly that was one of my assumptions about her that she prolly met someone else, but also her friends are way much younger than her and i met them and they are hard core party girls i just know they have a bigger influence to push her into things i know she wouldnt do. honestly i was thinking about even asking her younger sister just to get in more depth but im thinking its just prolly going to get me in trouble..and its going to go hey wire from there. but knowing her she is the type of person that if she feel uncomfortable she would let you know and honestly ive been getting at and i havent gotten pushed off, or she would tell me that im not interested...that why this is confusing i will take your advice as in not calling her i have done it at times.. and she would call me back etc..just some how its getting wierd at this point were i dont know how to react on this situation i mean im not the player of the year but honestly i think if any girl wasnt interested in someway they would immediately tell that person right?
bigmanpayne Posted July 23, 2008 Posted July 23, 2008 no its okay no harm intended honestly that was one of my assumptions about her that she prolly met someone else, but also her friends are way much younger than her and i met them and they are hard core party girls i just know they have a bigger influence to push her into things i know she wouldnt do. honestly i was thinking about even asking her younger sister just to get in more depth but im thinking its just prolly going to get me in trouble..and its going to go hey wire from there. but knowing her she is the type of person that if she feel uncomfortable she would let you know and honestly ive been getting at and i havent gotten pushed off, or she would tell me that im not interested...that why this is confusing i will take your advice as in not calling her i have done it at times.. and she would call me back etc..just some how its getting wierd at this point were i dont know how to react on this situation i mean im not the player of the year but honestly i think if any girl wasnt interested in someway they would immediately tell that person right? OMG! u sound like me before i was enlightened. girls... heck people are fickle creatures. sometimes there is just no rhyme or reason for people acting the way that they do. she might not be in to you persay, but loves the attention you give her and for that reason she wont push you away of flat out tell you to stay away. i know this very pretty girl (i mean model) who is not in to me but wants my attention/wants me to want her! its crazy. i told her that i dont like her like that and she flipped out on me! she isnt into guys like me (race, etc.) but her ego wont allow her to let a man not want to be with her. is there a good explanation for that? is that rational? of course not. women are mostly attention seekers, thats why the ignoring thing works. walk into a bar sit down and act like you dont care if a girl talks to you or not and you'll attract them - learned that from Tom Lykis. you are giving her attention whether she deserves it or not, whether she works for it or not, so it doesnt matter how she treats you. try ignoring her. try showing her that you dont need or want her anymore, if she ever felt anything for you, she will come sniffin' around, if not then move on anyway. thats all i can say.
Author djash85 Posted July 23, 2008 Author Posted July 23, 2008 hrm i can see what you are saying..thanks for the advice i will take try it out i will keep you posted thanks a lot man..
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