I have been hurt alot and i am tired of it!!! How do you find the right one?

[monae202]

hello i am only 16. young sexual active. i know that everybody has been through things like dateing before. But how do you find the right one? I meet one guy at a chruch i know bad thing to do. But at the time i was already talking to someone. Someone that I thought that i was going to be with but i guess i was wrong. Well, the guy i met at chruch was talking to someone else while i was there. So it hurt me bad cause i have been hurt alot and i am tired of it!!! so i say to my best friends that i am though with boys. but , if there is someone out there that knows what a girl needs and how to treat them I'm the one to pick up. so help a sista out!!!!!!!!!

[superd]

the church is a bad place to meet people, a high school friend told me (back then) that that is where he went to meet girls. I found that upsetting because it is not the best reason to go to church. I personally consider myself a good person and although I am not super-religious by any means, I consider the church a sacred place. The people that use the church to pick up are in my opinion not the best people.

[jalexy]

you are 16 and looking for the One? wow, i think i was doing that, only to realize WHAT THE HELL WAS I DOING!!! you are way too young to worry about that good old stuff.

just go and have fun and be smart. finish school and just go with life!

[longlegzs80]

What is the rush of finding someone at the age of 16? I just don't understand that. DAte, have fun, hang with friends, think about the future and if you are going to college etc. There is no rush to date, you are so young and you should just live it up with being 16. If you are still sexually active, I hope you are using birthcontrol and he uses protection too. Don't take any risks with no one. But as far as finding the one at your age, it will happen in time. Don't rush it, just have fun with friends, and live up the young teenage years. Kinda wish I was a teen.

[skotup]

ur unexperienced and keep making mistakes, thats ok, every1 does it when they are new to something. You just have to realise what mistakes u made(get over ur ex), usually the way to do this is to spend sometime single. If you're gonna break up with some1 just for talking to another member of the opposite sex ur never gonna find a partner, good luck trying to find a guy who will limit himself to speaking only to 49% of the population. But at the same time a 16 year old guy will also be inexperianced and make mistakes. You're just gonna have to wait till the guys are older and wiser.

[2SidestoStories]

I'm absolutely certain you are pretty fed up with hearing "You're so young! Get out and live life! etc." However, perhaps I can offer you some insight. At age 16, I was absolutely convinced I had everything in my life sorted out. I was going to go on to college to earn my bachelor's degree in theatre, and then I was going to take this internship that would allow me to live in Sydney, Australia and work at the Opera House (How cool is that?!) I was going to try to find a way to stay in Australia, perhaps forever. What I kept thinking would "complete" the puzzle for me was my soul mate. In my mind, I had everything all figured out except for that.

 

I dated some, and even had a really steady boyfriend for my last year and a half of high school. But things went, as they normally do, in separate directions. I chalked it up to, "Well, he wasn't "THE ONE" for me. That's why we broke up!" But then, as I went on to school, I met boy after boy, convincing myself each time that they were "THE ONE," and when the relationship failed, still using the excuse "Well, obviously he WASN'T!"

 

I'm now 25 and rather jaded, to be frank with you. I'm going through a divorce and have two children. I never did finish my theatre degree, and naturally with two small kids, did not get my chance to go to Sydney, let alone work in the Opera House. All because I was so fixated on finding "The one."

 

My advice to you is let yourself be young and carefree. Find something to have passion about and follow your heart there. Do not sweat the small stuff, like finding a mate, right now. You have your life to think about. You've got to love yourself and be a complete person in order to have a relationship that is worth having. Oh, and I don't mean to knock anyone's beautiful ideals of "The One" but I think that since people are constantly changing, that there is no such thing as a singular "The One." Live your life for you, be respectful of yourself and others, and set some goals and learn to follow through with them. That will open the doors to finding yourself, and perhaps that way, finding someone who will love you.

[nwrbear]

hey cheer up! you need to just be a sixteen year old write now.

 

you don't need to try to get in a sexual relationship with anyone

 

write now. don't go looking for somebody to love you it will naturally. you should right now focus on getting out of high school and doing something with yourself there is more than enough time in your life to meet that special someone. just enjoy life and one day your knight in shining armor will walk and love you. peace!

[superd]

Well I disagree with some of the posters here, it never hurts to start looking for the right one early, just don't get pregnant before you are ready to deal with that.