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Figuring out myself -trying not to obsess


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Posted

Ok, so last week I hooked up with a guy that I had hooked up with a few months ago to no avail. The first time we made out, he texted me a few times, we went back and forth for several weeks until I told him that unless he wanted to see me to bug off. He did. I ran into him at a party last week, we were both drunk, I made out all hot and heavy with him again. He hasn't called and I don't expect him too.

The problem being that I've known him for years and I always had a crush on him. I know that he isn't interested. I'm not stupid and I am not going to call him because I'd like to think that I have some sort of self respect left. However, I need to turn this into something good for me. I want to change this crap that do to hurt myself. I don't want to do this to myself anymore. It's stupid and does me no good. I hate that I made out with him again. It made me feel horrible. Any advice on how to change some really deeply ingrained habits? :o

Posted

Wow. Almost the exact same thing happened to me last week with a guy I've known for a while. I don't know how to help you feel good about the fact that he doesn't want more than a lame hook up.

 

On a bright note. You aren't stalking him or trying to get with him. You're playing it cool like the cool chick that you are. And, pat yourself on the back for not sleeping with him. That's probaby all he wanted and when you didn't give it to him he moved on. That's what I keep telling myself in order to feel ok with the "rejection".

 

You didn't hurt anyone by kissing him. You can feel stupid about it, but it could have been worse. If you feel bad about it then the answer is simple, just don't do it anymore. But, honestly, it isn't the end of the world.

 

Better luck next time :)

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Posted

Thanks, I just need to forgive myself and move on. I think that this whole thing just made we want to be better to myself, because really I deserve better than this stupidity. I want something better than this.

Posted
I just need to forgive myself and move on.

 

when i read your first post this was going to be the gist of my advice to you, but you've already got it down.

 

shi*t happens. i've done stupid things of this nature too that i kick myself for later, but eventually you stop beating yourself up and let it go.

 

and if you got at least a little bit of fun out of it ( ;) ) focus on that, forgive yourself for the rest, and remind yourself in the future that the bad you get out drunken impulses outweighs the good.

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