cantbeyourfriend Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 So my boyfriend of three years decided it was time we just be "friends" because I'm going to school two hours away. About a week ago I had a bit of a flip out. I wrote him a note saying that "lately we've been acting like we're just friends and I really want to work on this relationship so we don't turn out like that." We talked and then decided we were going to take a break for a bit and talk about it. He comes over and just says... "Your note really got me thinking that we have just been friends for a while now." I sit there speachless. Finally I say "thats not what my note was about, it was that we need to work on it so we don't turn out to be just friends." He comes back at me and says "Thats just it, I want to be your friend so bad." So I agree that I'd rather have him in my life than out, even if it is just for a wee bit of hope that in 3 years our "friendship" can go back to what it was. It just feels like it is completely my fault because I PUT those friend thoughts in his head. Now I have to hang out with him like nothings wrong because we have sort of the same group of friends, but I dont think I can do it. I don't want to be his friend you know, I want more than that. I really need help because I don't know what to do! Do i cpmpletely cut him off or try and be his friend, do I hope we will go back? HELP!!!
carhill Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 It just feels like it is completely my fault because I PUT those friend thoughts in his head. Now I have to hang out with him like nothings wrong because we have sort of the same group of friends, but I dont think I can do it. I don't want to be his friend you know, I want more than that. You don't control what he thinks or feels. In reference to the bolded portion above, having seen this from the male side of the street many times, I can tell you with certainty that remaining on as a "friend" when you feel more is unhealthy for you. Read the thread in my signature for information and support to heal yourself, perhaps to the point where you can be true friends.
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