HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 In the past, I had been doing online dating for a good while, so I gave up paying, and just joined free sites. Well, I've been doing online dating for a good while, and it's kind of funny, you know how when you get the site to get you "Your Matches"? Or when you do a geographical search within, say, 50 miles....well, lately, I'm seeing the same faces over and over. The majority of them I had emailed, only to have been ignored or rejected with a "sorry, not my type" (mostly ignored). And it's funny, because when I log in, I sometimes see them having had update their profiles Expressing their frustrations of online dating. How they can't seem to find a "Decent" guy or there was this one that actually said that she was deleting her profile because of the lack of luck they'd been having. There was this one I had noticed that actually joined the "Meetup" site I was a member of....she joined a "Singles" meetup group....and her profile stated, "I tried the online dating scene and now I've given up!" It's funny, how these women whine and complain how they can't find someone, they can't find a gentleman or a decent man to date, but when I guy like myself emails them, they ignore it. Heck, I've read some ladies profiles where I personally, thought we were a great match! But when I e mailed her, ignored. Then a year later, they "Blog" about it in their profile, "Sigh, I give up, there's no decent men online!" LOL And lately....I think I've emailed pretty much every woman in my geographic range. lol I think I ran out of even the online options. So, gentleman, have you ever noticed this?
DunnoWhat Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Yeah women are like that. Think about it... it's alot easier for women to get dates when they're out then it is for men. So why do they need to go online dating site? Because for a number of reasons I think - they are far too choosey with impossible standards - they have a negative personality (complaining and whinging about men) - they like the attention - they're just bored and want to chat Some women don't get out much and are genuninely looking for somebody but there is alot of women with bad attitudes. Those who complain about not being able to find good men will probably never find good men but just keep complaining all their lives without giving anybody a chance.
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Those who complain about not being able to find good men will probably never find good men but just keep complaining all their lives without giving anybody a chance. The same could be said about men.. Online dating isn't a woman's world dude.. Show some self confidence and some game.. You have to show a woman why she would want to go out with you.. She wants to go out and have fun, Why would a woman want to go out with a guy if she knows it isn't going to click and be fun ? .. Pity dating isn't what you want.. and that is what you are asking for when you make comments like they don't give me a chance.. if only they would give me a chance.. etc etc When I was online dating I put forth every single asset I had and showed the women online that I was the catch... I was the head turner.. I did it with self confidence and humor I was the guy that was a fun date even if there was no connection.. It was not unusual for me to go out on a date from online and spend 6 hours at dinner with them even though we had no connection.. We would have fun conversation and good dinner with no stress.. Remember.. No expectations and give them a laugh.. that is the key to having fun...
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Show some self confidence and some game..I don't play games. Sorry. These women are chronically single for a reason. Even when they start going out with a guy, they always try to find fault with those who they date in some shape or form And ..yes...the same can be said for guys. I have this male friend that is in his 50's, is overweight, and wants to date young college aged girls. Kinda almost "dirty old man". lol Also, you can only do so much online....put forth every assett and the like...all they do is glance at it, go " ew " and move onto the next photo....er....profile.
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 I don't play games. Sorry. Where did I say to play games ??? Showing some game isn't playing games dude.. it is making yourself attractive to other sex.. it is being aloof when you need to be.. It is showing self confidence and showing a woman you are up to the challenge In order to get women to date you you have to be something they are attracted to.... A self confident man..
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 These women are chronically single for a reason. Aren't you chronically single too ? It took me years to find my wife.. it also took her years to find me... It might have looked like we were both chronically single but we aren't anymore...
DunnoWhat Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 The same could be said about men.. Online dating isn't a woman's world dude.. Show some self confidence and some game.. You have to show a woman why she would want to go out with you.. She wants to go out and have fun, Why would a woman want to go out with a guy if she knows it isn't going to click and be fun ? .. Pity dating isn't what you want.. and that is what you are asking for when you make comments like they don't give me a chance.. if only they would give me a chance.. etc etc I'm not saying ALL women are like that but alot of women are like that online. I've a date tonight and a date again next week from online dating so I'm not knocking it just saying to the OP that there are alot of women with emotional problems so don't take it personally. There are genunine women on it too and it's possible to get dates if you yourself are genunine i.e. if you say things just to please them then they'll eventually notice. Women are better noticing these things then men.
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Also, you can only do so much online....put forth every assett and the like...all they do is glance at it, go " ew " and move onto the next photo....er....profile. Well.. you have to work harder dude.. online dating is a competitive market... If you aren't up for the challenge then you shouldn't be online dating.. you become the very thing you don't like about some of those women online.. I had many relationships from online dating.. some lasted 6-12 months.. some longer and that is also how I met my wife.. I guess I was successful at it.. Taking the cotton out of your ears might help you some.. You have to be open for advice in order for it to sink in
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Aren't you chronically single too ? It took me years to find my wife.. it also took her years to find me... It might have looked like we were both chronically single but we aren't anymore... I actually have a "stock" answer for that question due to years of getting that kind of response. There are 2 kinds of single people. 1. The overly picky, superificial, flakey wack jobs that are single 2. Me....the stable "good catches" that meet them. ;-)
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Well.. you have to work harder dude.. online dating is a competitive market... If you aren't up for the challenge then you shouldn't be online dating.. you become the very thing you don't like about some of those women online.. I had many relationships from online dating.. some lasted 6-12 months.. some longer and that is also how I met my wife.. I guess I was successful at it.. Taking the cotton out of your ears might help you some.. You have to be open for advice in order for it to sink in You were probably successful at it, due to geography perhaps...just a theory? I have noticed there are some areas where people are complete snobs...but up north in certain areas, women area asking the MEN out...or are completely open to dating or not as picky or shallow. Some are as are "Snob city" other areas are "sweet hometown girls" that like you for who you are. :-)
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Where did I say to play games ??? Showing some game isn't playing games dude.. it is making yourself attractive to other sex.. it is being aloof when you need to be.. It is showing self confidence and showing a woman you are up to the challenge In order to get women to date you you have to be something they are attracted to.... A self confident man.. I am self confident <shrug> I'm typically lucky if I get a date from online once every 6 months to a year.
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 I am self confident <shrug> I'm typically lucky if I get a date from online once every 6 months to a year. Is negativity a sign of self confidence ? You have consistently shot down each of my points with a negative response.. I wasn't successful because of geography.. I was successful because I showed them I was a fun loving funny guy who when I went out made the date about more than getting laid.. I was able to convey to them that if they went out with me that it wasn't going to be a 10 min date that they walk way from feeling yuck.. what a waste of time... I also studied the guy profiles out there of the guys who had been out there the longest and using them as a baseline of what doesn't work I fine tuned the wording in my profile to put my best assets out there... I learned what didn't work and what did..
2sunny Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 from experience i have noticed these things about men from online dating: fake pictures - believe me - you can tell very old pictures lying about their status and who they live with or where they live lying about their height/weight lying about their age lying about their job it's like - come on honey - just tell me the real deal so i can decide if i really would like you or consider dating you. to have to wonder where the truth lies isn't worth it. i'm sure some women do this as well - so it seems silly to me to start out considering dating someone on false information. but i agree - all of it is very frustrating.
DunnoWhat Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 I am self confident <shrug> I'm typically lucky if I get a date from online once every 6 months to a year. You should try to improve what you are doing. If you know what women want things will start making sense. Women want to feel good and some men no matter how they look or how much money they have can make women feel good. Do you make women feel comfortable etc? One woman was complaining to me about a man saying everything that he thought she wanted to hear. Disagreeing with them (not arguing) says to them you're not one of the "nice guys" who says nice things to make the woman like them. Disagreeing says that you have your opinions and you're not afraid of saying them. That alone is a turn on for women. They want men with strong characters. Also never put a woman on a pedestal. With you do that it means you're below her and this is another major turn off.
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Is negativity a sign of self confidence ? You have consistently shot down each of my points with a negative response.. I wasn't successful because of geography.. I was successful because I showed them I was a fun loving funny guy who when I went out made the date about more than getting laid.. I was able to convey to them that if they went out with me that it wasn't going to be a 10 min date that they walk way from feeling yuck.. what a waste of time... I also studied the guy profiles out there of the guys who had been out there the longest and using them as a baseline of what doesn't work I fine tuned the wording in my profile to put my best assets out there... I learned what didn't work and what did.. I am indeed a fun loving guy as well, I even have lady friends that have told me that. So I do have character witness. Not being negative, just stating the truth. THink about it, if you send a sincere email to a woman, who won't even respond back to it...chances are she was all about the looks and not about the character of the individual anyways. So thus, making her not worthy of you anyhow. But I bet you're going to say, "Well, you must not be conveying all this, because you're not having success" I call it BS, chances are you got the looks, and probably the personality as well. You can really can do SO much when it comes to "conveying" who you are to a woman.
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 THink about it, if you send a sincere email to a woman, who won't even respond back to it...chances are she was all about the looks and not about the character of the individual anyways. They don't want sincere sweet emails... They want funny humorous eye catching emails... Of all the emails I would send out the most successful ones were the ones that I let my humorous side show thru in the emails.. I would sometimes pick something out of their profile and make it into something like a quip or something that made them chuckle.. If they Chuckle.. they hit reply.. Simple..
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 You should try to improve what you are doing. If you know what women want things will start making sense. Women want to feel good and some men no matter how they look or how much money they have can make women feel good. Do you make women feel comfortable etc? One woman was complaining to me about a man saying everything that he thought she wanted to hear. Disagreeing with them (not arguing) says to them you're not one of the "nice guys" who says nice things to make the woman like them. Disagreeing says that you have your opinions and you're not afraid of saying them. That alone is a turn on for women. They want men with strong characters. Also never put a woman on a pedestal. With you do that it means you're below her and this is another major turn off. I don't tell women everything they want to hear....thing is....not to sound egotistical about it...but I'm indeed a decent man who treats a woman like a lady. But women have become so jaded and untrusting, things have reversed. So, the jerks are making the genuine guys look bad as well. Like I said, I do have real life character witnesses who can state that I'm a good catch. Online...its' mostly about the looks with these people. Sorry, gents....but it's not about "You must be doing something wrong" if you can't get an online date.....I just don't buy into it anymore. We could argue back and forth till we're blue in the face, but still you're not going to convince me that my actions online are not attracting women.
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 They don't want sincere sweet emails... They want funny humorous eye catching emails... Of all the emails I would send out the most successful ones were the ones that I let my humorous side show thru in the emails.. I would sometimes pick something out of their profile and make it into something like a quip or something that made them chuckle.. If they Chuckle.. they hit reply.. Simple.. Whatever dude.. every woman is different. I don't buy it "They dont' want sincere emails? I don't understand. What planet are you from...in fact, I have a great sense of humor and it shows in my emails as well
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 We could argue back and forth till we're blue in the face, but still you're not going to convince me that my actions online are not attracting women. Negativity.. it shows I'm sure online as well...
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 What planet are you from...in fact, I have a great sense of humor and it shows in my emails as well Come on... what planet am I from... I think I'm getting a picture of why online dating isn't for you... I would suggest stop dating online then if you aren't having any success.. Try yoga classes.. maybe that would work out for you..
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Negativity.. it shows I'm sure online as well... That's funny, because I'm the LEAST negative person I know. Typically this is a "default" answer by most people when all else fails in an arguement. I am far from a negative person...you're just confusing facts and reality with negativity.
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 - they are far too choosey with impossible standards - they have a negative personality (complaining and whinging about men) Look at Dunno What's response....maybe its the WOMEN being negative, hm?
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 That's funny, because I'm the LEAST negative person I know. Typically this is a "default" answer by most people when all else fails in an arguement. I am far from a negative person...you're just confusing facts and reality with negativity. Argumentative as well I see .. I have given you good points and gotten nothing from you but shiot responses.. You may very well not be negative in real life.. but... online you come across as someone who who some negativity and possibly sound a little fuddy duddy.. I don't mean that as an insult.. I don't know you.. and I don't know if you are like that in the real world but you do come across that way online in typed words.. Maybe just fine tuning the wording in your profile and working on your typed form in emails will help.. I'm sorry .. that is all I got.. I'm tapped out..
Art_Critic Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Look at Dunno What's response....maybe its the WOMEN being negative, hm? Certainly there are negative women out there as well.. but aren't you trying to figure out how to weed thru and date the ones that aren't.. Blaming women for your not being able to get dates isn't the trick either.. Blaming others never works...
Author HiItsMe Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Certainly there are negative women out there as well.. but aren't you trying to figure out how to weed thru and date the ones that aren't.. Blaming women for your not being able to get dates isn't the trick either.. Blaming others never works... Yeah, that's reserved for message boards.
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