HiItsMe Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 This is something I've noticed with a female friend of mine that I met over a year ago at a meetup group.....when I first met her, she was unattached/single...and I admit, I was interested in dating her, but she started playing games with me, making plans and not keeping them, canceling at the last min and so on. Heck, she even pulls this crap with friends.....one time, I hadn't heard from her in a while, she calls me up, and tells me her and her boyfriend is going to meet us at the club. He and her never showed, lol. Apparently they took a nap, fell a sleep and woke up at 2 am. lol But it's always an excuse with her, becuase it ALWAYS happens....she's not reliable I guess. So, I just left her alone, but she still stayed in touch "as friends", I have no problem with this, because she's cool otherwise, and she likes to hang out in groups with us outside of "Meetup". She met this guy, and now is currently dating him exclusively. After that, she stopped hanging with us....but, I guess that happens....when people hook up, they only spend time with each other and no one else. However, there are COUPLES that still hang with us....because...well...I guess that's how they roll. IT was kind of funny, because she told me, "Just shoot me if I become one of 'those couples that HAVE to do everything together'". Well, she JUST sent out an email to the 4 of us, saying she wanted us to get together at this restaurant. Then....later on, right after that she said, "Sorry, can't make it....my boyfriend will be out of town" And I replied, "So how is your boyfriend being out of town affect you hanging with us?" Which was funny, because her boyfriend attended a function with US, without her. So I was wondering what that was all about. Anyhow, ever run into people that are so joined at the hip, they lose touch with all friends?
carhill Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 Psychological disorder? Not the joined at the hip part, rather the erratic part..... Yes, I've run into plenty. They suck the life force out of you. Personally, if I were in your shoes, this friend would be moving into the acquaintance category. I'm not hearing that she's really interested in you as a person anyway.
Author HiItsMe Posted July 17, 2008 Author Posted July 17, 2008 Psychological disorder? Not the joined at the hip part, rather the erratic part..... Yes, I've run into plenty. They suck the life force out of you. Personally, if I were in your shoes, this friend would be moving into the acquaintance category. I'm not hearing that she's really interested in you as a person anyway. Yeah go figure, but she wants the 4 or 5 of our "rat pack" to get together out of the blue, right now. The guy she's dating is like 10 years younger than she is, I wonder if it's just one of those physical relationships. I know you're not with the, but that's the vibe I get from them. Personally, I think she should make everyone she "used to know" not only me, but the others back to "Acquaintence Level" Funny, she used to call me all the time when she was unattached. Flake.
carhill Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 "ego feed" "boost" "attachment disorder" I had females who stuck me in the friend zone and beat up on me like that, many years ago. I let them. Don't be me
Author HiItsMe Posted July 17, 2008 Author Posted July 17, 2008 I'm trying to figure out...if she treats her friends/acqaint. that way....how she treat her current beau??
Lauriebell82 Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 Yeah I know couples who do EVERYTHING together. It's sort of easy to fall into that, because you are around each other a lot, therefore when your all happy and in love sometimes the rest of the world doesn't matter. I have a friend who met her now ex-fiance and totally forgot about all her friends so she could spend time with him. Now that they broke up she is trying to renew the old ties she has (including with me) but it's hard to trust completely that she is going to be reliable when we make plans because for so long she'd just ditch us to hang out with him. To each his own I suppose, but it's sort of a nasty habit to fall into because if you break up, you dont have any friends to "get you through it" because you alientated all of them.
Lauriebell82 Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 I'm trying to figure out...if she treats her friends/acqaint. that way....how she treat her current beau?? She most likely does NOT do that to her bf. If she did treat her bf like that, HE would be the one blowing her off and they wouldn't constantly be together. Anyway, do you know how long they have been together? They may be in the "honeymoon period" where nobody else in the world exists and they don't want to be around anyone but each other. Most couples DO get out of that stage eventually when they realize their SO can be a pain in the butt sometimes, therefore they lose desire to be with them 24/7.
Author HiItsMe Posted July 17, 2008 Author Posted July 17, 2008 She most likely does NOT do that to her bf. If she did treat her bf like that, HE would be the one blowing her off and they wouldn't constantly be together. Anyway, do you know how long they have been together? They may be in the "honeymoon period" where nobody else in the world exists and they don't want to be around anyone but each other. Most couples DO get out of that stage eventually when they realize their SO can be a pain in the butt sometimes, therefore they lose desire to be with them 24/7. I would have to say a little over a year. Maybe RIGHT on a year perhaps? *edited* I dunno, I just find it odd, that if he's OUT OF TOWN...that she can't hang with us while she's still available to hang out with.
backto1 Posted July 17, 2008 Posted July 17, 2008 Man I've had some friends who have to bring their damned girlfriends out with us every time and we stopped inviting them out with us. Even if she wasn't supremely annoying it's just wrong. If 5 guys are going to a bar to play pool or something, does the girl really have to come? Every time? Sometimes sure...but after a while it gets pretty old.
Mahatma Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 I have a friend who likes to call me and say "hey I'm going to a show and have no one to go with, you wanna come?" I'll say yes so he isn't there alone ya know? Then I get there, guess who is there.... his girl. He ALWAYS does this to me. I don't want to sit there with you and your girl n watch you two need a room. It bugs me the most when he invites me somewhere just me and him and his girl is there. Or even worse when I invite him, and only him, but he takes the liberty to invite his girl. If I wanted girls, I woulda said I was bringing my girlfriend and he was welcome to bring his.
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