HiItsMe Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 I have heard this a few times from people. For instance, you're in a public place, you see a woman you find attractive, you get to chatting with another male bar regular and he says, "Forget it, she's out of your league" Typically, "leagues' seem to mostly fall under physical appearances. She's drop dead gorgeous thus "out of your league". Quite silly if you ask me. One time, there was this male friend of mine, who worked with this female lady co-worker of his , this lady co-worker knew the same woman at a nother store that he had a thing for. And he started talking about her...to this lady co-worker. And she says to him," Have you ever considered dating someone....well, more in your league. Someone more equal to you in the looks department?" Now, he's what I would classify as an average looking guy I suppose, and the girl he's interested....probably somewhat "cute" but not a knock out, but he found it quite insulting, for one...for his female co-worker to make a snooty remark as such. BUt does anyone believe in the concept of leagues. Now, I took a sociology class, now they say people in different CLASSES (Upper Class, dating lower class) might not work out...but that might be a diff. animal.
bones1 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I think I read that people generally settle down with others that are similar to themselves in the looks dept. If you have a scale of 1-10, a 7 will usually be with someone who is a 6-8. A 2 with a 1 or 3 etc. Now fame and money would throw all of this off, but I am speaking of most regular people. So would a pudgy regular guy who is 5 foot 4 and 250 lbs land a model? I would say a model is out of his league.
D-Lish Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 Some of my friends are dating or married to guys that are cheating, emotionally abusive losers. I have a stunning friend who is seeing a less than average looking dude that has taken to telling her HE is out of her league. It drives me nuts because she has internalized this belief that he is too hot for her. The guy has a personality of a rotton peanut and I think he looks like a rabbit... I'm being generous to give him a 4 out of 10 rating- where she is def closer to a 9. It's not about money either- she makes double what he does. Another close friend of mine is a beautiful, sweet generous girl whose big fat pompous ass of a husband is always trying to grope me or make sexual comments to me in front of her. She just pretends she doesn't see... I won't even go around anymore when he is going to be there. I wish some of my friends would wake up and start dating guys that are in their league in the looks and personality department. Oh, and with regard to that co-worker comment about finding someone closer to him in the looks department- that's just plain rude and disgusting to mention to someone.
Lizzie60 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I do believe in 'leagues'.. and not just the physical aspect, I think it is also the 'intellectual' aspect as well. Like I said in another post.. I don't think a drop dead gorgeous person would date a nerdy, fatso, 'acneish' guy/girl... or that a very intelligent person would date a 'borderline'... There are definitely 'leagues' IMO...
bones1 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I don't understand the "intelligence" league, lol. Intelligence is simply someones capacity to absorb information, ascertained by taking a standardized test. So, someone less intelligent who reads a lot might have a lot of info to share. Someone really bright might be really boring. Intelligence is hard to quantify. I dated girls who couldn't cook an egg, but they could speak 4 languages fluently. I would almost rather have a less intelligent egg cooker.
porter218 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 most of the people I have talked to consider what "league" someone is in to consist of both looks and class. Not just looks. I have seen crackheads women that are beautiful, but nobody would tell anyone "oh she is out of your league". Her socioeconomic status outweighs her looks, and lands her at the bottom of the barrel. (this is just an extreme example). Looks aren't the only factor at play here usually.
bones1 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 Porter, good point..Much more makes up a persons desirability than just looks.
kizik Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 There's the loveshack dating world... and then there's the REAL dating world, where anything can happen, anyone can end up talking and/or being attracted to anyone... and "rules" set forth by narcissists don't actually come into play.
KinAZ Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I guess you could say that there are "leagues" but it has never been anything that I've seen as a Better Than/Worse Than type of situation. Example, a high maintenance man, who is only into high maintenance women is "out of my league." Likewise, a man that vain couldn't get next to me even if he endlessly tried to woo me, and thus I am "out of his league." I don't think it's just a matter of genetics, but a combination of things, such as class, intellect, sophistication, manners, and other social matters, etc. While I do maintain that no one is any better than anyone else, and everyone is desirable to someone out there, it comes down to one being "sub par" according to an individual's standards in general. But no, I don't think it's just a matter of natural physical beauty. (Consider those who are addicted to make up with those who are not. Even a Plain Jane can doll up, and then appear to be in a different "league.") Look at the "ugly" men with money who get the beautiful women, or gorgeous men with not-so-gorgeous rich women. Where are the leagues there? People can "make up" in one department where they lack in others, so to speak, just as they can change their so-called leagues. I've had crushes on guys who weren't exactly my type in the looks department, because I got to know them. So, unless the person saying "she's out of your league" knows the woman very well, it's a pretty dumb thing to say.
refurb Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I know of a few couples who are poorly matched by "league". They are happy so who really cares? RF
Star Gazer Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I believe in leagues, but it's more of an "entire package" kinda thing. Appearance, personality, sense of humor, integrity, ambition, altruism...the entire package.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 I believe in leagues, but it's more of an "entire package" kinda thing. Appearance, personality, sense of humor, integrity, ambition, altruism...the entire package. So, I take it your looking for a guy with a big package?
forrest Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 One time, there was this male friend of mine, who worked with this female lady co-worker of his , this lady co-worker knew the same woman at a nother store that he had a thing for. And he started talking about her...to this lady co-worker. And she says to him," Have you ever considered dating someone....well, more in your league. Someone more equal to you in the looks department?" Now, he's what I would classify as an average looking guy I suppose, and the girl he's interested....probably somewhat "cute" but not a knock out, but he found it quite insulting, for one...for his female co-worker to make a snooty remark as such. my response would have been: "I think you are right. I should date someone in my league. But I think we should extend it to friends too, and honey, I am wayyy out of your league."
Recommended Posts