thekid55 Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Long story short: Dated a girl at college for 2 months before summer started. We moved really fast and I did fall for her. We both got out of tough relationships in the winter. I was over my ex and she had me convinced she was over hers. She wouldn't accept his calls, threw away the pictures, etc. Very cold to him. Summer came and she cried in my arms before leaving since we would be 5 hours apart for the summer. She gets home and gets bombared by the ex. He tries to kiss her at some party and she pushes him away and he starts calling her names. She calls and I help her. I recommend that she not go to parties where he is at. She views this as me controlling her. Things eventually fell apart and we've been broken up for about a month. She called me once 2 weeks ago to talk and emailed me Saturday asking how I am. I found out today that she went to the beach with her ex one day and they are "talking". I don't know...From what I've seen from her actions and what she has told me, she is not interested in dating him. She had me under the impression that she just wanted to be alone and get over him so she could come back to me...maybe she is just trying to see if that's dead? I dont know.. What do you think of the situation? School is 7 weeks away.
justaman99 Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 She looks to you for advice, you offer something that sounds reasonable enough and her response is that you're controlling? If this is true in how it went down it sounds to me like she's confused in what she wants. She might be thinking of reconciling with her ex and used this as an excuse to break things off from you so she can make that move if she wants or even explore time with him to see if it's the right thing. -Just
Author thekid55 Posted July 15, 2008 Author Posted July 15, 2008 Throw in the twist that she started texting me last night after she read my response to her email. We did text for like an hour.
LOSTINJAPAN Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 Yes, a similar case has happened to me with me where my girlfriend went back to her hometown only to be swept off her feet by her ex-boyfriend, the one that she broke up with before we hooked up. Some women will talk negatively about a guy and eventually that will be the guy they end up hooking up with. This girl sounds very wishy washy in my opinion. She seemed to break up with you because of convenience and now she is talking about coming back to you as school is approaching. So now that you are at a distance, you have no use for her. In my opinion, if she did this once already, she will do it again. The question I have to ask you is "Is she worth it?" The relationship is at a risk to fail again. The fact that she called you controlling for suggesting not to go to any parties where he is at is ridiculous. A typical woman would be glad that you said this because it shows how much you truly care about her. Plus if she hates her ex, why are they "talking". The choice is yours but if I were you, I would say sayonara.
saraispiel19 Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 Thinking my butt. This girl is playing games, she wants a few good weeks with oldie and go back to you once school starts. I'd say goodbye to miss fickle. Plus this sounded like a rebound relationship to me. Goodluck to ya!
Author thekid55 Posted July 16, 2008 Author Posted July 16, 2008 Anyone else have insight? Thank you to you to those who have posted thus far.
hurthawk Posted July 16, 2008 Posted July 16, 2008 Long story short: Dated a girl at college for 2 months before summer started. We moved really fast and I did fall for her. We both got out of tough relationships in the winter. I was over my ex and she had me convinced she was over hers. She wouldn't accept his calls, threw away the pictures, etc. Very cold to him. Summer came and she cried in my arms before leaving since we would be 5 hours apart for the summer. She gets home and gets bombared by the ex. He tries to kiss her at some party and she pushes him away and he starts calling her names. She calls and I help her. I recommend that she not go to parties where he is at. She views this as me controlling her. Things eventually fell apart and we've been broken up for about a month. She called me once 2 weeks ago to talk and emailed me Saturday asking how I am. I found out today that she went to the beach with her ex one day and they are "talking". I don't know...From what I've seen from her actions and what she has told me, she is not interested in dating him. She had me under the impression that she just wanted to be alone and get over him so she could come back to me...maybe she is just trying to see if that's dead? I dont know.. What do you think of the situation? School is 7 weeks away. Hmmm. I agree with the above posters, it appears that she is playing games. Or she may just be confused (and immature). Since you guys are so far apart school wise I suggest you just keep things light and don't expect anything from her. She accused you of being controlling when clearly you were offering excellent advice. But ask yourself this, Do you really want to be with someone when they are unable to properly identify their feeling for you? And it sounds like she's been less than honest as well. My advice is to just move on and don't close yourself off to other people because your holding out hope for her... don't wait around, if she wants to be with you she will make up her mind, but it also seems like she doesnt really have to make up her mind because you will still be there for her regardless. Goodluck... and besides, you are in college, have fun, you will have exposure to a lot of very cool women.
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