Lookingforward Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 no one said anyone is to blame! who cares? the point is to remove the misunderstanding. the longer you continue to look for reasons not to be on the same page as him - the more he is unlikely to consider trying again. I totally agree - don't overanalyse it , just DO it fgs
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 15, 2008 Author Posted July 15, 2008 So he read my brief email and no reply......I only emailed how is he, I am wondering how he is doing and I hope I can take a trip very soon. Instead he approved some stupid cheesy graphic saying ' hope youre having a great week' from the same 'new' friend on his myspace. She lives in his city too... Now he is on AIM with status away saying he is playing video games online and no phone calls please.... Hmm. This doesnt look good. ANd he rarely plays video games....Only when he is bored or ticked off.
2sunny Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 that is because your e-mail gave him NOTHING to work off of. you are coming across as being coy (again) and just messing with him (not fair to him at all). why don't you just lay the situation and your feelings out on the line and see if he responds to real information? if you choose not to - i don't blame him for ignoring you because you are appearing to play silly and stupid games with him.
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 15, 2008 Author Posted July 15, 2008 that is because your e-mail gave him NOTHING to work off of. you are coming across as being coy (again) and just messing with him (not fair to him at all). why don't you just lay the situation and your feelings out on the line and see if he responds to real information? if you choose not to - i don't blame him for ignoring you because you are appearing to play silly and stupid games with him. I asked him how he is and what's new.... Anyway I talked to my best friend of 11 years...She said that I and this guy are going to drive her bat doodoo insane. She says he was trying valiantly one more time to SHOW interest by addressing me calling myself semi-decent (by saying I was more than semi - decent) and by fishing around with saying he would tell his friend I have I boyfriend... But then she added she thinks I SHOULD just leave things alone for now. She knows better than anyone what stress Im facing over next 3 weeks and says it would be kinder to leave this guy out of it for now. So I think that's my noble plan of action. Leave him alone until a time where Im together and not playing around like he a is puppet (it was so NOT on purpose)
2sunny Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 i know you asked how he is and what's new. that really means NOTHING to a guy! you continue to just sabotage this possible gathering with such insignificant correspondence. i don't think you are anywhere near mature enough to even begin getting started with the male gender. wait until you can obtain a clear idea about how to communicate clearly with men. you just seem to make any interaction with him painful - at best. he will be better off for not getting started with you - so you both did yourselves a favor. don't mean to be harsh... just calling it like it appears from here.
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 15, 2008 Author Posted July 15, 2008 i know you asked how he is and what's new. that really means NOTHING to a guy! you continue to just sabotage this possible gathering with such insignificant correspondence. i don't think you are anywhere near mature enough to even begin getting started with the male gender. wait until you can obtain a clear idea about how to communicate clearly with men. you just seem to make any interaction with him painful - at best. he will be better off for not getting started with you - so you both did yourselves a favor. don't mean to be harsh... just calling it like it appears from here. Um that is very harsh and uncalled for. I've had two lovely long term relationships. I'm used to creative sensitive men who take the lead and clearly express themselves. I'm still great friends with my last boyfriend. He was able to totally express his needs and wants. We parted but still share friendship. In fact I'm going to his wedding next month. I'm under the worst stress of my life and the REASON I have not been shouting from the rooftops how I care is that he hasn't given ENOUGH signs to make me feel safe to. He has PROBLEMS with expressing his emotions. He admitted this on our first date. That he doesn't understand 'hand holding' he doesnt understand what 'chick flicks' are about and that fluffy displays of emotions embarrass him. He has something lovable about him but this is NOT an easy man to know. Kind of like loving a lamppost. I really am feeling fragile and the last thing I need is rejection.
Lookingforward Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 that is because your e-mail gave him NOTHING to work off of. you are coming across as being coy (again) and just messing with him (not fair to him at all). why don't you just lay the situation and your feelings out on the line and see if he responds to real information? if you choose not to - i don't blame him for ignoring you because you are appearing to play silly and stupid games with him. I have to agree with sunny - an email like that is NOT "laying it on the line" - It comes across as just a normal 'hi, how you doing' communication, that doesn't require any response he has to think about (apart from maybe, you're too busy for me, why are you emailing?) Why would reconnecting with someone you really like and finding out he feels the same way cause you MORE stress?
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 15, 2008 Author Posted July 15, 2008 I have to agree with sunny - an email like that is NOT "laying it on the line" - It comes across as just a normal 'hi, how you doing' communication, that doesn't require any response he has to think about (apart from maybe, you're too busy for me, why are you emailing?) Why would reconnecting with someone you really like and finding out he feels the same way cause you MORE stress? So he emailed me back. Told me his job is driving hum nuts. He is starting a new one in few weeks and will tell me more later. That he needed to go for a run and de stress. Asked where do I want to go on Vacation .. (since I emailed him I need a vacation badly) Hmm. Okay feel free to yell at me. (but be gentle I just had my only surviving parent who is disabled try and guilt me over the phone to give up my free time and devote myself to them indefinitely - I already wiped out my life savings to put them in a wonderful skilled nursing place and now this thanks)
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 23, 2008 Author Posted July 23, 2008 Well he took a week to get back to me after I wrote another email much more personal and lay my heart out for him. He finally wrote back very impersonal email. He also now has a some very young looking 20 years old bleached blond huge boobed bimbette as new friend on myspace/facebook. he posted a photo them from this past weekend. A mutual friend was wedged between them.. But tonight i figured out she is his new squeeze... he wrote some comments to her that he will make amends for something (he added smiley) she flirted back. he also adopted a puppy and say he started his new job.... He is mature for his age and I thought he might have a yen for much younger chicks (he is nearly 32) He denied it but this proves it. Whatever..... he wrote that he will update me on his new job soon. Wow thrilling. And again his best friend tried to hit on me online.
Author HeartLikeLead Posted July 24, 2008 Author Posted July 24, 2008 so now Im confused again.... I uploaded new pics that are slightly sultry on myspace///// i wasnt expecting him to look at them or comment.... he commented on one of them.. a friend joked that im a brainy but hot chick. i joked back im a brainy chick who taken a temporary vow of ceIibacy So he appeared and made a comment! "wrote' 'ceIibacy is not the way to go' What the hell ? Is he trying to tell me to go find new men to have sex with an dmove on ????? I wrote back its only temporary but easy because my standards are so high... so he's still looking at my pics sometimes.. my head hurts anyone decipher this ?
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