CarrieT Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Well, I was I was anticipating the BF's return home late Friday night. For two months while he was away, I had been working my way through and preparing for "the big discussion" upon his return and I was mostly a pile of nerves last week. During the talk, we were both having a few weepy moments at the loss of a passionate love, but there is still the love of good friends. The "talk" was very short and sweet -- I started off by saying I didn't want to live with him anymore and he as much jumped in and said, "I know it isn't working and let's not assign blame" meaning there was no reason to go over all the problems of the past year; we both have issues with each other but agree that we work well together. He also confirmed that business-wise, he would be lost without me. It is all good - seriously. Best Case Scenario; I am going to maintain our office/apartment and work for him, he will move (but probably not for several weeks), and I will have an annuity set-up to guarantee my salary. He and I have a lot of logistics to work over the next few weeks. I will actually resign as a business partner and only be an employee (I'll be less pissed at his business decisions that way). Because I will have a guaranteed income and the same freedom I've become accustomed to these past few years, I won't have to move all my ****, and I will have the time and space to pursue being an artist. There was a thought I would have to return to the corporate world and at least for a while, I can concentrate on being an artist and also perhaps dating. The past few days have been quite surreal. We are happy, amenable, and almost in love again. Well, not really -- but we are kind and affectionate with one another, knowing that we are moving towards individual goals that we can both attain with each other's help. There is more peace between us than either of have known in over a year. I am probably going to take a small vacation on my own early next month. One of the things he has asked for, since he has been gone for so long, is that he wants to at least feel like this apartment is his home and I won't push that. He knows I have a lot of work to do with the jewelry and after we get through a bunch of business planning and stuff, I'll be concentrating on that. The big question is where will he move since he wants to be someplace he can set up another branch to the business. He is actually considering Europe but will probably head back to Central America. We also both agreed that neither of us won't be seeing other people while we are still living together and I'm okay with that too. I am not even sure how to go about dating at all and I'd like to actually live alone for a while, getting set in my own skin as it were.
saraispiel19 Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 That is great and lucky for you your relationship ended up curtiously. It's nice to see a girl with a good head on her shoulders and have future plans (and good luck with those!). Goodluck to ya and keep us posted!
kizik Posted July 15, 2008 Posted July 15, 2008 That is great on paper - but at some point you're going to have to allow yourself to feel sad about it, otherwise it was never a relationship in the first place.
Author CarrieT Posted July 16, 2008 Author Posted July 16, 2008 That is great on paper - but at some point you're going to have to allow yourself to feel sad about it, otherwise it was never a relationship in the first place. I have been sad -- and crying quite a bit about the loss of the great love that started the relationship. Also, I have had 2 1/2 months alone to mourn the loss of the relationship and just anticipating how I was going to break-up with him in the first place. I am more sad than you know, but there is a point where the healing has to start taking place. And the fact that we are going to have to live together for 60- to 90-days isn't going to make the ultimate separation easier.
Author CarrieT Posted July 18, 2008 Author Posted July 18, 2008 Well, I found out why the break-up went so smoothly. Seems He already has a girlfriend in Panama. The ironic part is that during the break-up, HE suggested we wait until we fully moved apart before we start seeing other people only to discover he's already got someone lined up who he's been seeing. Feeling so battered and bruised that I waited 2 1/2 months for him to come home from Panama before breaking up with him -- while NOT having sex together for over a year-and-a-half, to learn he's been getting some and is already establishing new relationships whilst I've been the polite one in waiting. Now I have to get through THIS hurt while trying to see if we can salvage a friendship to continue working together (we have a multi-million dollar business together and I am seriously considering walking out on the money just to save my soul).
immizunderstood Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Don't be crazy, use the money to SAVE YOUR SOUL! Don't let the Panama chick get what you busted your a** to get. The time you've invested in both the relationship and the business you deserve. Ivana Trump said it right, don't get mad, get everything. Stay strong, you'll make it out. Panama probably just needs her papers anyway!
saraispiel19 Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Now I have to get through THIS hurt while trying to see if we can salvage a friendship to continue working together (we have a multi-million dollar business together and I am seriously considering walking out on the money just to save my soul). Oh you big silly- you'd have to start from scratch and giving up all that lolly you earned! I understand there is alot of emotional baggage but still this is not the correct decision: of course if you would like to branch out your business is a different matter. Don't let go you'd be mad if you did! It'll be a BIG risk!
pandagirl Posted July 18, 2008 Posted July 18, 2008 Girl, DO NOT GIVE UP THE MONEY! This majorly sucks, with your ex being deceitful, but take what you've earned!!!
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