dajp Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 My ex convinced me to move in with her, with the understanding I'd be pretty busy taking some of the hardest courses of my univ. degree this summer. I still had some time left on an old lease, and moved my things. Despite the fact I thought we had an understanding, she suddenly dumps me during exam week and leaving me just days before the end of the month to find a new apartment. Luckily I renewed my old lease at the 11th hour and because I was also insanely busy with school, I couldnt move everything out straight away, thus couldnt do the no contact thing. Following exams I got all my things, (but forgot some of it - more contact) and flew out east to spend 2 wks with family and friends. Near the end of the 2 wks I get IM'ed, with the ex saying she missed me terribly, realized what she had lost and would I please consider dating again. Upon my return I foolishly decided that not much harm could come from one date. We were supposed to go out, but she had to stay in to finish some work at home on the computer... she made me dinner, and was charming and funny like the old times, and one thing led to another (she's by far the most beautiful girl I ever dated and on this account I was fairly weak). So I spend the night, this is Thursday. In bed afterwards, I'm pretty confused and state that. She tells me why worry about the future, we should just live in the present and take this one day at a time. The evening was entirely romantic and wonderful and this plays on my mind the entire weekend and culminates in a strong decision on my part to go back and fix the relationship as best I could. Monday we go out for breakfast and I get told once again in deliberately certain terms that it is over. Yesterday I got the rest of my things and got pushed and prodded into a conversation I didnt want (you seem upset, whats wrong)... which provided her with a bridge into explaining her side of things, back to the time issue again, back to the fact we hadnt been out doing the things we enjoyed... Ironically, I planned the 2nd half of my summer so that I would have much more free time to compensate for the 1st half and now I have tons of time on my hands and find myself heartbroken for the second time. She expressed a desire to remain friends but I don't feel as though I can do anything but go for no contact at this point, at least for several months. I'm just left amazed at the fact that things switched so suddenly, and then back again.
Dark-N-Romantic Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I'm sorry to hear that you had to go through that. Don't feel bad because you wanted to give her a second chance and I would strongly suggest you go no contact. Not just for yourself, but for her... It sounds like she is too afraid to think about a future with you and/or is playing monkey by hanging on to you while she is looking for another man. And my suggestion for you, the next time a woman tells you "Lets live in the moment.", brace yourself for a breakup. DNR Second chances are only a waist if one is stepping back into a situation where someone heartlessly did you wrong and/or harm.
Author dajp Posted July 14, 2008 Author Posted July 14, 2008 Thanks for the understanding. The fact that she did come back and say she missed me provides me with some small shred of hope, but the fact the second chance was cut so short and with such an abrupt turnaround pretty much seals it. Any further attempt on my part to try to get her to come back around would be really foolish. Time to move on.
TrustInYourself Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 What the hell? Why the quick turnaround. That's lame.
Recommended Posts