Nemo Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I hope that he can contain his enthusiasm and learn to not let his little brain override his bigger one. It's probably not that little.
Gunny376 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 The title says it all. TT is one of the best guys I've ever met, but this morning, after I found myself lying in a puddle of his piss after a trip to the bars last night, all my feelings have vanished (and the weekend before, I actually told him I loved him.) I don't think the fact that he peed on me was the reason. I mean, I know it was an accident - he was drunk; it could have happened to anyone. It's just, I was already annoyed with him cause of his clinginess and horniness, and before I had the chance to set some boundaries, that happened; and now I'm afraid it's too late, that he's pushed me too far away. Can someone tell me how I can get back to fantasizing about weddings and babies? Cause my instinct, right now, is to bail. His clinginess is flattering but borderline psycho. He literally begs me not to leave him. This is the first afternoon I've had to myself in two weeks. Don't get me wrong - I love doing everything with him too - but I need SOME space, sometimes, which is difficult to get when your SO climbs on top of you and says, for forty minutes staight, "Please stay; five more minutes; stay." And he always has a hard-on, which makes me feel guilty for not always wanting to have sex, which, recursively, makes me want sex even less. I don't want to do it for more than an hour each and every day, but he does. Does that mean we're sexually incompatible? (Note~ I didn't read the entire thread ~ just the intital post) It means that TT needs to get some self confidence and something called a Life.
johan Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I have to admit there have been a few times that I was so excited to see my girlfriend that I dribbled a little. But I was completely sober. I think your guy has a problem.
Nemo Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 (Note~ I didn't read the entire thread ~ just the intital post) You mean there are people out there who read the whole thing?! They must have no life. It means that TT needs to get some self confidence and something called a Life.Well, a life is easy enough to get, but a Life is way too expensive. I just can't afford one of those, especially with the rising price of gas.
Citizen Erased Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I have to admit there have been a few times that I was so excited to see my girlfriend that I dribbled a little. But I was completely sober. I think your guy has a problem. :lmao: You are so hot right now.
Nemo Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I have to admit there have been a few times that I was so excited to see my girlfriend that I dribbled a little. What happened next? Did you mount her left leg, or her right leg? Or did you settle for some kind of middle ground?
kladia Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 All I could think of was Spud in the movie "Trainspotting" the morning after he spends the night at his girlfriend's parents' house, poops in the bed, and then fights her parents for the sheets and it gets flung all over them. I've met a couple guys who have "bladder issues" when drinking. I think it's probably more common than some would let on. I know that would keep me from ever drinking a lot! Luckily I've never dated any of them.
jerbear Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Not anymore! I think she let out a monster! I remember when I was a virgin no more, it was a new found discovery. I wanted it more. So I can see where spookie and TT comes from in TT always being excited around her.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 You mean there are people out there who read the whole thing?! They must have no life. Omg I must seriously not have a life, since I do read entire threads... just not the ones that have 20 something pages. By the way Spookie, for a sec I assumed the title was your play on words or a pun, but after reading your post, I was honestly horrified. I know there are ppl out there who drink piss for health reasons (?) but damn, bodily functions are disgusting... and it's bad enough being a girl with pms every month, but to sleep in someone's piss?
Fun2BMe Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 All I could think of was Spud in the movie "Trainspotting" the morning after he spends the night at his girlfriend's parents' house, poops in the bed, and then fights her parents for the sheets and it gets flung all over them. I've met a couple guys who have "bladder issues" when drinking. I think it's probably more common than some would let on. I know that would keep me from ever drinking a lot! Luckily I've never dated any of them. I think it's common to have the "I HAVE to go" feeling when you drink TOO much. There are many reality shows where otherwise decent people urinate in the street after having had too much too drink and not being able to hold it but if it happened in bed I would say he was too lazy to walk to the bathroom.
Ally Boo Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I dated an alcoholic once. He pee'd on my hardwood floors once while he was drunk. I felt pissed on. lol
shadowplay Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Don't take this the wrong way Spook, but I had feeling you'd wane on him quickly once you described his personality in more detail. It seems to me the type of guy who really makes you melt is a bit of an ahole, or at least confident enough to not really need you. Your ex was that way and so was that other guy you dated briefly and fell for despite him treating you like crap. Unfortunately TT is the exact opposite of that mold. His positives don't really matter in the end, because on a basic level he's too weak for you. Your head and heart are at odds because you see all of his good traits, but can't understand why you're turned off on a primal level. Neither extreme is good, the indifferent aholes or the clingy puppy-dogs. You need someone who is balanced and mature, not emotionally withholding or draining. I can relate because I'm turned on and off by similar guys.
Storyrider Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Don't take this the wrong way Spook, but I had feeling you'd wane on him quickly once you described his personality in more detail. It seems to me the type of guy who really makes you melt is a bit of an ahole, or at least confident enough to not really need you. Your ex was that way and so was that other guy you dated briefly and fell for despite him treating you like crap. Unfortunately TT is the exact opposite of that mold. His positives don't really matter in the end, because on a basic level he's too weak for you. Your head and heart are at odds because you see all of his good traits, but can't understand why you're turned off on a primal level. Neither extreme is good, the indifferent aholes or the clingy puppy-dogs. You need someone who is balanced and mature, not emotionally withholding or draining. I can relate because I'm turned on and off by similar guys. Or at least his bladder is too weak for her. The real answer...well...Depends. No, seriously, I agree with you that Spookie needs someone with an iron-clad self confidence. She seems really tired of babysitting. :confused: It just occured to me that his peeing is the way the Universe chose to illustrate that for Spookie in graphic multisensory detail. Listen to the Universe, Spookie!
melodymatters Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Or at least his bladder is too weak for her. The real answer...well...Depends. No, seriously, I agree with you that Spookie needs someone with an iron-clad self confidence. She seems really tired of babysitting. :confused: It just occured to me that his peeing is the way the Universe chose to illustrate that for Spookie in graphic multisensory detail. Listen to the Universe, Spookie! :lmao: good one story !
Storyrider Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 :lmao: good one story ! It is kind of eerie, Mel. The Universe has been very vocal lately, it seems to me.
thebrunette Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 I really don't think there is any way that peeing in the bed as an adult with no health problems, can be justified. If I had this problem when I drunk then I would not drink so much, to solve the problem. It is really dirty don't be convinced otherwise.
Author spookie Posted July 13, 2008 Author Posted July 13, 2008 TT is a really nice guy, and I like hanging out with him a lot, but I don't think he could ever be irreplacable to me. It's probably possible to have a happy healthy relationship with someone you know you can find a different version of in about 3 minutes, and in general I think that's what I have with him, but I can't see this lasting past the summer, especially since I do link sex with love and I've lost all desire. I don't know what qualities make someone irreplaceable, but my guess is that it's necessary that they touch you in the lonely empty crevices few people even see. I think, as I tend to do, that I mistaked TT's insecurities early on for depth; or maybe our depth is of a different nature. At any rate, I doubt he'll ever be able to connect with me on that deep emotional level that makes me horny. And that's really the most important thing I'm looking for in a relationship. Shadow might also be right that for me, the perfect guy has to be kind of an a-hole, or, at least, have unshakeable confidence in himself. TBH, TT and I started hooking up when I barely knew him. Because he is tall, muscular, and in a fraternity, I assumed he'd have the ashsole thing down, but I was completely wrong about that, too. My point is, I am sure now that he's not another "one". I don't think there's a tactful way to break up before his internship's up (I got offered to stay longer ) so I think I'll drag this out until he leaves since I do enjoy his company, but in my mind, I'm a single woman again (though not free to hook up with anyone new till August 8th).
jerbear Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Sounds like you have a plan. Congrats on staying longer.
Author spookie Posted July 13, 2008 Author Posted July 13, 2008 Why do I end up with these spineless child-like wussies? Is it cause I'm a hardass and kind of a bitch? This is probably not a very flattering compairson for me to make about myself, but I think my personality is similar in many ways to Celia Hodes', from Weeds (I'm not a nosy backstabbing hypocrite, but she's got my alcoholic ball-busting cynicism down). I think that the most of the guys who can stand to be around me are either the a-holes, who aren't phased at all, or the ones looking for psycho domineering mommies. Neither of those types is right for me. I think I need someone who appreciates my strength but loves me for my weakness. Unfort. that's not so easy to find.
Fun2BMe Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Why do I end up with these spineless child-like wussies? Is it cause I'm a hardass and kind of a bitch? This is probably not a very flattering compairson for me to make about myself, but I think my personality is similar in many ways to Celia Hodes', from Weeds (I'm not a nosy backstabbing hypocrite, but she's got my alcoholic ball-busting cynicism down). I think that the most of the guys who can stand to be around me are either the a-holes, who aren't phased at all, or the ones looking for psycho domineering mommies. Neither of those types is right for me. I think I need someone who appreciates my strength but loves me for my weakness. Unfort. that's not so easy to find. Not to be rude but how is it you're so hardass if you let him piss on you and put up with him not taking you out among the other things which I won't list to prevent it being too harsh? Just trying to be real.
TheSilentType Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 How can someone with little confidence expect to get with someone with unshakeable confidence in themselves?
Author spookie Posted July 13, 2008 Author Posted July 13, 2008 Not to be rude but how is it you're so hardass if you let him piss on you and put up with him not taking you out among the other things which I won't list to prevent it being too harsh? Just trying to be real. I'm of the camp that him pissing on me was an accident which it isn't right for me to judge him for. I think it happens more often than people think. Him not taking me out... for what it's worth, he did take me out as soon as I mentioned it; and he's paid for everything we've done with our friends (despite my protests) and taken me home to meet his friends and family etc. He is NOT mistreating by any stretch of the imagination. By "hardass" I just mean that I tend to call people out when they are being stupid, and that I can be quite argumentative.
TheSilentType Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 How can someone with little confidence expect to get with someone with unshakeable confidence in themselves? Is that even possible? Equating azh*le with confidence is ridiculous. Everyone knows that someone who needs to acts obnoxious and loud to prove a point has some serious underlying mental hangups
Author spookie Posted July 13, 2008 Author Posted July 13, 2008 How can someone with little confidence expect to get with someone with unshakeable confidence in themselves? Why do you think I have little confidence?
Fun2BMe Posted July 14, 2008 Posted July 14, 2008 Why do you think I have little confidence? I think she meant your bf has little confidence.
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