Walk Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 OMG. This guy sounds like my exH. He pee'd the bed too. That really dampened the love. If I were you... I'd run. Except, if he's like my ex then you won't get too far.
jerbear Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Ok... now two posters had guys who pee'd in bed. I understand there are certain ages where guys would wet their beds but I do not remember adult men not senior men losing control over their bladders. Now I'm starting to see why spookie's love is waning. I think she should talk to him about it. Being tongue tied, shy, losing bodily controls, and wetting the bed is not exactly my vision of what a man should be. The last time I remember wetting the bed was when I was a toddler.
whichwayisup Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 I just hope one day he doesn't sh.it in the bed after being drunk and passed out! Look, you need to space from him and TELL him that if he truly loves you, to give you time and space to think. Go NC with him for afew weeks so you can figure out what you feel and what you want to do. AC is right, it's too early for him to pissing in the bed. That's supposed to happen 40 years from now when you two are in rocking chairs and shoved in an old age home!
Citizen Erased Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 This reminds me of a party my best friend had. Her and this guy got really drunk, were making out, he then threw up (not in her mouth thankfully) so we made him go to my best friends bed to sleep it off. I then walk past there maybe 15 minutes later and he is standing on the bed peeing on the headboard. I cracked up laughing, ran into the lounge room and informed everyone (great friend that I am). Very fun times. This guy is now dating my little cousin. Anyway... So my mother slept next to perhaps the biggest drunk in the country and she just confirmed that he never wet the bed. At least not when she was in it. That is just nasty Spookie, I doubt anyone would be able to feel attracted to another person after that. I'd go with your instinct and bail.
johan Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Maybe if you just took the time to slip a diaper onto him each night before bed you could regain your attraction for him.
Author spookie Posted July 12, 2008 Author Posted July 12, 2008 I talked to his friend from college whom I also know through work (not about the pissing) and he asked me if TT and I ever went on dates, which got me wondering why we don't. All we ever do is hook up or cuddle in his room or go out with other people. I think this, along with the fact that he spooks easily when conversations get intimate, might be why I am feeling no connection and pressure to put out. I'm close to wanting to end it, but before I do, I'm going to give him a chance by stating how I feel.
Storyrider Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Maybe if you just took the time to slip a diaper onto him each night before bed you could regain your attraction for him. :lmao:
Author spookie Posted July 12, 2008 Author Posted July 12, 2008 Would all of you immediately and permanently lose attraction for a guy who wet the bed while you were in it? I honestly expected to be called a biatch for not being more understanding, since it WAS an accident.
Citizen Erased Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 God yes I would. Nothing like being covered in your SO's pee to kill the love.
Author spookie Posted July 12, 2008 Author Posted July 12, 2008 I just hope one day he doesn't sh.it in the bed after being drunk and passed out! Look, you need to space from him and TELL him that if he truly loves you, to give you time and space to think. Go NC with him for afew weeks so you can figure out what you feel and what you want to do. AC is right, it's too early for him to pissing in the bed. That's supposed to happen 40 years from now when you two are in rocking chairs and shoved in an old age home! That would work if we'd been together longer then three weeks and weren't going to become long-distance in another month (he has a year left of college).
Art_Critic Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 since it WAS an accident. An accident ?? This wasn't the first time he has been so drunk that he pissed himself.. He certainly didn't do it on purpose but it also wasn't an accident.. an accident is when you trip and spill wine on the carpet... Pissing in the bed is just a disgusting element of him getting trashed beyond being able to control his bodily functions... If he was in control of his addiction then you would not have had to wake up in a puddle of someone else's piss. Personally it seems to me that you are just looking for reasons to just excuse away all his bad behavior thinking he will one day tell you he loves you... There are a lot of other guys out there Spookie that won't piss on you and still will treat you right..
johan Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 He could have saved the whole thing if he had just said, "sorry, I thought you were into that kind of thing." He loses face by admitting it was an accident. If he wasn't completely mortified, then I'd have to wonder what kind of upbringing he had. Whose bed were you in?
Art_Critic Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Would have felt differently if you had both lived together and you had to make the bed and clean up the sheets ?
Citizen Erased Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 He could have saved the whole thing if he had just said, "sorry, I thought you were into that kind of thing." He loses face by admitting it was an accident.
Author spookie Posted July 12, 2008 Author Posted July 12, 2008 Would have felt differently if you had both lived together and you had to make the bed and clean up the sheets ? Well, if we lived together I'd make him make the bed and clean up the sheets. But yah, if it had been my bed I probably would. And you're right that it isn't the first time he peed himself. He was telling me a couple of weeks about about a time he peed on someone's couch only to get kicked out of her apartment in his piss-soaked jeans. I thought that was funny but now I'm thinking he has a problem.
Art_Critic Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Well, if we lived together I'd make him make the bed and clean up the sheets. But yah, if it had been my bed I probably would. And you're right that it isn't the first time he peed himself. He was telling me a couple of weeks about about a time he peed on someone's couch only to get kicked out of her apartment in his piss-soaked jeans. I thought that was funny but now I'm thinking he has a problem. I guess it is all about what you are willing to accept as acceptable... If what he did isn't acceptable then draw the line..
Author spookie Posted July 12, 2008 Author Posted July 12, 2008 I guess it is all about what you are willing to accept as acceptable... If what he did isn't acceptable then draw the line.. Hm. I'm willing to accept that from someone I'm in an R with, I guess, as long as it's not a regular occurance. For what it's worth, he HAS cut down on his drinking considerably since we got together. I don't know why I'm making excuses for someone I don't care if I never see again, though; especially given that I feel no real connection or attraction anymore and given the considerable number of red flags.
jerbear Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Well, if we lived together I'd make him make the bed and clean up the sheets. But yah, if it had been my bed I probably would. And you're right that it isn't the first time he peed himself. He was telling me a couple of weeks about about a time he peed on someone's couch only to get kicked out of her apartment in his piss-soaked jeans. I thought that was funny but now I'm thinking he has a problem. Don't worry about the living together when he is going back to college. Talking about another thread on college degrees. This is not a good behavior to have. Being in the business world, he would not get very far after peeing on a his bosses very expensive couch. I have to agree that it is time to let this summer fling go, 3 weeks and instead of getting dumped on, you got pee'd on.
MaxManwell Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 He peed on you... how long have you been going out for ? I mean, wow, thats pretty intense.
HiItsMe Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 The title says it all. TT is one of the best guys I've ever met, but this morning, after I found myself lying in a puddle of his piss after a trip to the bars last night, all my feelings have vanished (and the weekend before, I actually told him I loved him.) I don't think the fact that he peed on me was the reason. I mean, I know it was an accident - he was drunk; it could have happened to anyone. It's just, I was already annoyed with him cause of his clinginess and horniness, and before I had the chance to set some boundaries, that happened; and now I'm afraid it's too late, that he's pushed me too far away. Can someone tell me how I can get back to fantasizing about weddings and babies? Cause my instinct, right now, is to bail. His clinginess is flattering but borderline psycho. He literally begs me not to leave him. This is the first afternoon I've had to myself in two weeks. Don't get me wrong - I love doing everything with him too - but I need SOME space, sometimes, which is difficult to get when your SO climbs on top of you and says, for forty minutes staight, "Please stay; five more minutes; stay." And he always has a hard-on, which makes me feel guilty for not always wanting to have sex, which, recursively, makes me want sex even less. I don't want to do it for more than an hour each and every day, but he does. Does that mean we're sexually incompatible? Actually, when a mate is comfortable enough with you to pee on you, that's true love right there! LOL.
Walk Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 I talked to his friend ... he asked me if TT and I ever went on dates, which got me wondering why we don't. Why do you feel you don't go on dates? Would all of you immediately and permanently lose attraction for a guy who wet the bed while you were in it? I'd lose resepect immediately. Your guy seems to have a trend of pee'ing at inappropriate times. I guarantee you'll get to experience the joy of being soaked by his urine again if you stay with him.
Lizzie60 Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Wow..classy guy.. why do you have to hang around jerks like him? Geeezzzz... women sometimes!!!!
Trialbyfire Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 If someone looses bladder control once while being hammered, I don't think it's a big deal. If it's a consistent problem, that's when you should be concerned and have him go see a doctor. I don't think this is the problem spook. If he's not for you, move on.
Nemo Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 If someone looses bladder control once Totally agree with you. I'd be more willing to forgive that, than leaky spelling or grammar.
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