awesomeness43 Posted July 11, 2008 Posted July 11, 2008 We are in the same state but actually some what of a long distance relationship. 5hr drive or 1hr plane. We have both agreed that this has serious potential and want to see where it can go. We've discussed the distance issue and are both ok with it and agreed to see each other for atleast 2 weekends a month as we both have the means to just fly out. I really am in to her and love everything that we are. Of all the women ive been with i care for her the most though it might be a bit premature to say that seeing as how we've known each other for only 6 weeks and not officially a couple. We talk for hours on end a day and web cam and send pictures of our daily lives via cell phone. My problem is that in one conversation i asked her about her past. This led her to asking me about mines. I lied about the actual number and told her a smaller number. (8) And she told me hers. (5). I didnt think i would be bothered as that as a fraction of what ive done. But it really bothers me to the point where just the thought of it is sickening and yet i just ask for details on how it happens. She assures me that it wasnt anything serious though there were a few one night stands involved that really bothered me. My biggest fear is that ive never really cared about someone to the point where it would bother me when i think of them with anyone else. She has given me no reason to doubt her and go beyond reassuring me by making it obvious to everyone *friends/facebook* that we are together when we arent official yet. Im just a big believer in karma and the fact that ive been with girls who seem to be in seeming happy relationships and would hook up the same night after clubs is a scary thought to me. What can i do to get over this? Its sickening to the point where because its such a good thing and i care so much that i want to just ignore her and not talk to her again just so i dont have to feel this way? Ive gone out and just hooked up thinking it would make me feel better knowing that even if she was cheating, we'd be even when i know she isnt like that.
just-a-girl Posted July 11, 2008 Posted July 11, 2008 Depending on how old she is 5 is a fairly conservative number. You are going to have to find the confidence to trust her there is no magic solution. Do what makes you feel good about yourself and make sure that you are happy with yourself then you will be more confident.
Author awesomeness43 Posted July 11, 2008 Author Posted July 11, 2008 shes actually 19..... is 5 considered alot of a little at that age? in my opinion i would think that is fairly conservative. but just the fact that i care so much bothers me.
Carmen87 Posted July 11, 2008 Posted July 11, 2008 You have no right to be "sickened" by her number when you yourself felt it necessary to lie about how many people you have been with. Don't create a double standard.
Ollie9 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Hello Buddy, Sorry to read of your angst, you should take a look at my thread/post on here......it's all about feeling insecure and paranoid. How old are you? It seems to me that if you are also 19-25 ish then you are both still much too young to be worrying like this. You are both still children in many ways, I am now 45 and what life has taught me is that you can never be secure or at peace with yourself, this is borne from many years of being cheated on by my ex-wife and various partners since. I think that you should enjoy each other whilst you can and if you are still 'bonded' as you reach your late 20's then start to think about making things permanent.....until then take each day/week/month, each meeting as an adventure. I really wish you both luck and all you would wish for yourselves. Feel free to read my thread and ask me anything about my experiences should you feel it could help. Ollie
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