Linux Posted July 9, 2008 Posted July 9, 2008 I'm not talking about the creme of the crop rich/very handsome type. I'm talking about the average guy. Is it hard at all to get attention or pick up the average guy? Because as a guy, it seems like I have to do a **** load of work just to pick up very average women. Yes I can pick them up so I'm not bitching about not be able too, but at times it seems like I have to been in way too much work and all the women have to do is sit there and wait for men to come flocking to them (and I'm talking about normal/average women, not the hot ones). Me and my boys go out to the bars/clubs pretty much every weekend and you know what, I'm getting pretty sick of the amount of effort it takes just to get a few conversations going and even fewer phone numbers (and some nights we completely strike out). It just seems like the game is completely lopsided in effort.
zink Posted July 9, 2008 Posted July 9, 2008 Its pretty damn easy id say. Guy and girl walk into a crowded bar. Guy can spend all night trying his luck - girl can just walk around and discreetly ask the question..."any of you guys want to come back to my place"......she'll leave with someone guaranteed.
2sunny Posted July 9, 2008 Posted July 9, 2008 I'm talking about the average guy. Is it hard at all to get attention or pick up the average guy? ummmm, no it's really not hard at all... average or above average...
Trialbyfire Posted July 9, 2008 Posted July 9, 2008 This is such a men v. women attitude. OH YAHHHH...how completely flattering that he wants to do me...regardless if he's a jerk or not!!
bones1 Posted July 9, 2008 Posted July 9, 2008 But men have the advantage of choosing. Women can get sex easily, but they don't know if that man likes them, just wants sex, etc. My advice would be to travel abroad once a year. You get an entirely new perspective of dating.
jellyfarm Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Ok here's the thing (from my persp, of course) I used to go to bars in college to have a good time with the girlfriends. I dunno about other ladies in the house but I also secretly used to go there to show off 'my wares', not that I was very feminine to begin with but I managed to be attractive enough to solicit some interest from other guys in the bar who were chatty and wanted to dance or buy me a drink. Now while I felt 'good' at the attention, somewhere along the conversation line, I just felt there was no chemistry or interest to take this beyond the bar/club that night. So even though numbers are exchanged, either part would not follow up because innately I would not feel that that person really was going to be Mr Right, ya know... So that's why it does seem extra work to take on a woman in the bar. But generally women are harder to take on because we're just women. We're really intuitive about what we feel about a guy when we first meet him. Friend or guy who's going to rape me. Subconsciously, all women are implanted with this innate fear of being killed by a man. Don't ask me why but a recent study just revealed that and I thought it was quite interesting, so maybe that's why a woman takes a longer time to get to know because they gotta trust you and be courageous enough to show you their vulnerable side. It doesn't come easy peezy ya know. You gotta work it!
Jilly Bean Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 As women, we don't think in terms of how easy it is to score, Linux. That's a boy thing. We are just thinking of ways to fend off your advances and annoyed with you hitting on us every time we leave the house.
Krytie TV Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 The reason you're working so hard is because you and "your boys" are going to meat markets where the testosterone meter is off the charts. Women go there because they KNOW all they have to do is sit there. As far as these situations go, I have very little sympathy for you. When you have tried dating people from the real world, maybe you'll find that it's not so difficult. It also might have a lot to do with the fact that you're at the "scoring" stage of your life too. As long as you go to score and get digits from ho's, yeah, it'll be a little work.
Jilly Bean Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 The reason you're working so hard is because you and "your boys" are going to meat markets where the testosterone meter is off the charts. Women go there because they KNOW all they have to do is sit there. Oh, Krytie. Were that it were that easy! In addition to perching on a bar stool in heels and not tottering over, we also have to fling (or twirl) our hair suggestively, keep our lips glossed while sipping a cosmo or margarita, and make sure our bra straps aren't showing under our Prada bustiere. These things take skill, K. Skill.
Krytie TV Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Oh, Krytie. Were that it were that easy! In addition to perching on a bar stool in heels and not tottering over, we also have to fling (or twirl) our hair suggestively, keep our lips glossed while sipping a cosmo or margarita, and make sure our bra straps aren't showing under our Prada bustiere. And dont forget about having to constantly have the presence of mind to "block out" undesirable men that seem headed in your direction. You're right, I spoke with ignorance and lack of appreciation for what women have to go through at meat markets.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Actually its a bit of hard work... i guess... putting on makeup.... finding the right outfit, matching shoes.... that sort of thing.... but thats because we like to look our best. getting picked up by guys is just a bonus.
2sunny Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Subconsciously, all women are implanted with this innate fear of being killed by a man. Don't ask me why but a recent study just revealed that and I thought it was quite interesting, so maybe that's why a woman takes a longer time to get to know because they gotta trust you and be courageous enough to show you their vulnerable side. It doesn't come easy peezy ya know. You gotta work it! huh? i'm not afraid of men at all! or that they may kill me. i'm a slim gal and can handle (and have) a 220lb man. yep, i have had to literally beat the crap out of a man that was trying to take my life. i'm not afraid because i knew at that moment that i could defuse the attack myself and i was perfectly capable of achieving this at that moment. he was beating the crap out of me and after a few brief moments HE was the one on the floor being pinned down by me. it doesn't really take a lot of strength to accomplish - you just need to be smart about how and where your energy is expended. FEAR? i think not.
Ruby Slippers Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 This is one of the best things about being a girl. Breakups suck, but every time I have gone through one, within days there's a line of guys waiting for their shot with me. And it just seems to intensify the older I get. After my last breakup, I had my pick of three guys who were all working pretty hard to capture me. That was fun.
FormerNiceGuy Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 Women usually dress up in clubs..not only to attract men but to compete amongst other women. As a man, you have other advantages that a woman may never have. The biggest irony of all is that the men who work "hard" to get women are those that fail. I never work hard to get a woman, as I do not let desperation serve as an obstacle. When you have the mentality that it is "hard" to get a woman, you have failed. A woman is not the goddess to be sought or worshiped. She is merely a woman. She is no better than you or I. Society has fooled men into thinking otherwise.
McLovely Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 ....all the women have to do is sit there and wait for men to come flocking to them (and I'm talking about normal/average women, not the hot ones). My guess is that you are sending some signals to these "average" women that they are NOT "hot" ones. For example, maybe you don't appear as animated to them or as "into" them as you would with a woman you found more attractive. Or maybe your eyes are following the figure of another women while you are pretending to pay attention to plain jane. NO woman wants to feel like they are "not hot", as you put it. All women want the same thing - to see a sparkle in their man's eyes that tells them they are the most beautiful woman in the room bar none.
Brady_to_Moss Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Cant we switch it around for like a week? Were girl have to work hard to get the guys? maby then i would get a date!
zicke Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 I do not have to work at all, other than putting on makeup, clothes and flirt. I love being a woman. No offense.
porter218 Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Subconsciously, all women are implanted with this innate fear of being killed by a man. What??? Wow that sounds nuts. I will never feel like that I am 115lbs but I know I can take a gorilla of a man any day of the week. I beat the wheels off of a 230lb muscular man before. No man scares me, but many men are scared of me after they have dealt with my wrath. As for what the OP is talking about..Yep the scales are tilted. Women don't have to do anything to get a man. I have never ever approached a man in my life, but yet I have never had a shortage of men.
KinAZ Posted July 12, 2008 Posted July 12, 2008 Mmmm, I'm not usually interested in the average guy. Not average in merely appearance, but average in general. So, as was stated by another poster, my main concern is just being left alone. I have my days, but I tend not to wear make up or things to draw more attention to myself. I much rather stay low key, as it can be annoying to try being nice when you just don't want to be bothered. That may sound anti-social or something, but now more than ever, I guess, I'm more annoyed by having to make excuses or tell lies... or be cold. I think for most women, who have a healthy self-image and self-confidence, just being tidy and present is probably enough for average guys to approach. (Whether or not you want them to approach is a totally different matter.) If you mean "get a guy" as in actually go after him, in general, the most trouble I will go through is positioning myself near a guy who has caught my eye. If he's single and interested he'll say something. If he doesn't, I'll just assume that he's not one of the above.
JP77 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 Actually its a bit of hard work... i guess... putting on makeup.... finding the right outfit, matching shoes.... that sort of thing.... but thats because we like to look our best. getting picked up by guys is just a bonus. You could walk around in paper bags and you'd still look good.
jon01 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 This is one of the best things about being a girl. Breakups suck, but every time I have gone through one, within days there's a line of guys waiting for their shot with me. And it just seems to intensify the older I get. After my last breakup, I had my pick of three guys who were all working pretty hard to capture me. That was fun. You really are full of yourself aren't you.
JP77 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 You really are full of yourself aren't you. What's wrong with that, I like women like that. confidence is a wonderful gift.
Blue Eyed Brain Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 It's a trade off: Women don't have to work hard to get a man's attention and men can pee standing up.
jon01 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 What's wrong with that, I like women like that. confidence is a wonderful gift. No nothing wrong with that, it's all good.
JP77 Posted July 13, 2008 Posted July 13, 2008 No nothing wrong with that, it's all good. Confidence, not arrogance. JB was being arrogant. But she has that attractive qualiy - confidence.
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