oregonbigc Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 I was dating a girl for 7 months everything was great, we never fought, never had problems, everything was wonderful. I however have been working 70 hour work weeks and was feeling the pressure to move the relationship to another level as moving in together or something. I asked for a break about 5 weeks ago. She said to take as long as i wanted she would be there when i was ready. We never went on that break, we continued to talk and stay the night at each others place. then 2 weeks ago, we went out, she was drunk, one of my friends introduced me to a girl friend of his and she came up and introduced herself right away. I teased her about it the following morning and then she asked if i wanted another break, Me being the stupid talk before you think guy said, maybe we should because we really didnt take one the first time. Well 2 days later, i missed her so much, I realized I want to be with her and only her and take things to the next level. When I told her this, she told me that now maybe she needs a break for a while to make sure this is what she wants. She said we should just be friends for now. AGGGGHHHH! We havent really communicated much in the past 2 weeks. I sent her flowers and chocolate covered strawberries at work, and I left a card and a CD of our songs on her doorstep, before I left town. I am on vacation back to the west coast for 8 days. I think she in now in NY with her gfs. She texted me a week ago to have a good time and be safe. I dont know whether to do no contact or to pursue this with reckless abandon. I love her, she told me she wants to be with someone who knows they want to be with her. I do now! How can I get this girl back in my life, the no contact is driving me crazy. Can she just forget about me like that after 7 months and the intimacy and closeness we shared. She sounded cold as ice when I spoke to her 2 weeks ago. I know she cared, she wanted to be with me so much just a couple weeks ago. I need some advice and any thoughts on what may be going on in her mind. A little background. I am 31 she is 24 she was in a 6 year relationship prior to me, but they had broken up for a while prior to this recent break up. She broke it off, because he didnt give her the attention she wanted. He played a lot of video games instead. She is a good girl with good values, works a lot. But she is very beautiful and likes to go out with her friend and loves the attention and myspace attention. Although she downplays being that way. She also says she doesnt play games and just wants someone who will treat her right, but it sure feels like games on this end. Please advise.
miss_28 Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 I teased her about it the following morning and then she asked if i wanted another break, Me being the stupid talk before you think guy said, maybe we should because we really didnt take one the first time. oh boy... i hate to tell you, but if you had behaved like this with me, i would have acted the same way... i would have been really turned off by that line... especially the timing (you would want to take a break right when a new girl introduces herself to you)... i don't think she's necessarily playing games, but she's less concerned with your needs right now and focusing on hers. Possibly the way she sees it, she's behaving exactly like you asked her to by asking for a break, so maybe she thinks you're playing games. Let her know gently you understand her behavior and that you respect and care about her, that you said something really stupid and that you'll give her her space... (afterall, if she wants to come back, she will, provided you don't smother her now). And be sincere about it too... that's my advice.
Author oregonbigc Posted July 10, 2008 Author Posted July 10, 2008 I did that 2 nights ago when we spoke, I told her how much i cared and why i wanted the break and how sorry i was and how solid i am in my feelings. but she was cold, she is being entertained by other guys now, i don't think i even enter her mind.
miss_28 Posted July 10, 2008 Posted July 10, 2008 i'm sorry to hear that... give it lots and lots of time... and take that break you were asking for to begin with. you don't really have a choice anymore... hang in there...
Recommended Posts