focusonk Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 I have been Married 22yrs I love my with all my heart but something is wrong with me. I cheated on her 5yrs. ago it has been over for 3yr. I have doing great until the 1st of June I wrote note to a women leftit on her car to see if she wanted to get together well she told security and got fired after 18y. then my wife finds out Ias emailing another women whom I kissed at work, then she found out I was texting inappropriatly with a neighbor who's huband is best freind.... That is the short version, I never had sex with any of them.... What is wrong with me and why do I keep hurting my wife who I do truly love, I am lost
Author focusonk Posted July 7, 2008 Author Posted July 7, 2008 I have been Married 22yrs I love my with all my heart but something is wrong with me. I cheated on her 5yrs. ago it has been over for 3yr. I have doing great until the 1st of June I wrote note to a women leftit on her car to see if she wanted to get together well she told security and got fired after 18y. then my wife finds out Ias emailing another women whom I kissed at work, then she found out I was texting inappropriatly with a neighbor who's huband is best freind.... That is the short version, I never had sex with any of them.... What is wrong with me and why do I keep hurting my wife who I do truly love, I am lost Thanks for any imput
Owl Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 Have you gone to marriage counseling or individual counseling? Sounds like you should start there. There really isn't anything an online forum can offer someone with your history. You need therapy if you truly want to "figure this out".
savethedrama Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 You are insecure. You need constant attention from the opposite sex to make you feel worthy. Ask yourself why the attention you get from your wife isn't enough? Will it ever be enough? If not, then you have a problem and need to see a counselor alone. If the problem is that you DONT get attention from your wife and are starved for it, then you should go to couples counseling. If you tell her without a 3rd party present she may get defensive and end up doing more harm than good. We all want to know "we still got it" sometimes. Attention from the opposite sex it the quickest way to get that satisfsction. But needing the constant reassurance from other women puts you in a dangerous place mentally and makes you more prone to cheat. If you love your wife and don't want to hurt her then get help before you ruin everything.
u91746 Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 The other possibility is that you want out of this marriage and you are sabotaging your relationship to give you that way out. Truth is, what your heart feels radiates out to your mouth, your hands and your feet. You end up saying, doing and going places that are honest with your heart. You are not in touch with the truth at the centre of your core, or you are and you have found yourself unhappy. It sounds like you are not sharing with your wife all these feelings inside, either because you are afraid or have lost the ability to communicate with her. Either way, counselling would help.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 What is wrong with me and why do I keep hurting my wife who I do truly love, I am lost There could be a hundred reasons. Get professional therapy.
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