dancinggal Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 My boyfriend is completely sweet to me, and has moved around the world to be with me, leaving behind good friends and career prospects. However, the way he acts about his ex-girlfriend kind of makes me jealous. He came to study here a few years ago (when we met), and had to leave his ex behind, so they broke up and I know it hit him really hard because he was into her a lot. Then we hooked up, and decided to do the whole long distance thing for a year until he could come back. In this time, she tried to hook up with him, but he said no because of me. Just before he left to come down here to be with me, he found out his best friend slept with her a few months after they broke up. He is extremely angry, and he tells me its just at his friend because all their friends promised each other that exs were off limits, but he calls her and asks her why it happened. They were together YEARS ago now, and since then, he's fallen in love with me. When I asked him if it was extra upsetting because of the girl it was with, he says no, and gets angry of me for even thinking about it, but it sounds like it about her, right? Have a got a right to be jealous here?
Ronni_W Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 but it sounds like it about her, right? No...wrong! He says it is about being betrayed by his friend, and it sounds as if it is about that. It's just seems that he is finding it easier to hound her for his answers ('closure') instead of going to the source of his anger, which he already knows is the friend. YOU are making it about the girl instead of helping him realize that, if he really wants to recover from his feelings of betrayal and anger, he needs to have an open and honest discussion with his friend. That girl is no threat to you. He's already left her and moved around the world. He is done with her. The threat that I can see, however, is if you allow your disbelief in what he's telling is the problem and your own jealousy to get in the way.
Recommended Posts