mistieyed Posted July 7, 2008 Share Posted July 7, 2008 why is it that he bolts (he went no contact after me stating my needs to continue the relationship not allowing me any closure whatsoever) and i feel bad about putting myself out there again to meet someone new? it hasn't been long, but i have always been told that if you want to get over a heart break, you get back up on the horse. it doesn't feel great, but neither does sitting at home wondering what i did wrong. thoughts from the outside? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted July 7, 2008 Share Posted July 7, 2008 I found that dating casually for awhile, gives you a chance to get your equilibrium back. Avoid rebounding, if you can. The risk of hurting someone else AND yourself, is pretty high. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mistieyed Posted July 7, 2008 Author Share Posted July 7, 2008 I found that dating casually for awhile, gives you a chance to get your equilibrium back. Avoid rebounding, if you can. The risk of hurting someone else AND yourself, is pretty high. I definitely do not want to hurt anyone else, honestly, I just want to hear from him. I am thinking that it is way to soon to dive back in no matter what the circumstances are as my heart is too tender right now. thank you for your thoughts TBF, I always enjoy your posts. Link to post Share on other sites
ate_the_paint Posted July 7, 2008 Share Posted July 7, 2008 TBF usually has good advice...wait until your feet are back on the ground...a couple of months of no contact should do it. Get back into being single with your friends, etc. Then date someone casually...it really does help once your head is in the game. After a short while you'll forget all about what's-his-name? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mistieyed Posted July 10, 2008 Author Share Posted July 10, 2008 tonight I am hurting and fighting the urge to contact him (but do not plan to because I know that it will only make me feel worse). it has now been 2.5 weeks since I sent my email to him and I have yet to hear anything. how does someone spend a good amount of time with another and then just disappear from your life without any explanation? I would not even think of leaving someone like that - it is hurtful and leaves a mark. you would think that it would make me glad that I dodged that bullet and I guess in time I will feel that way, but right now my gut feels ripped out. Needless to say, I have decided not to try to date anyone at this point. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted July 10, 2008 Share Posted July 10, 2008 Falling out of love through NC can be painful. While it doesn't feel like it right now, it does get easier and finally one day, you won't care! Keep on trudging along, one foot in front of the other. You're presently in a down cycle. It's okay to feel sad. Just don't get trapped in one cycle. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mistieyed Posted July 10, 2008 Author Share Posted July 10, 2008 Falling out of love through NC can be painful. While it doesn't feel like it right now, it does get easier and finally one day, you won't care! Keep on trudging along, one foot in front of the other. You're presently in a down cycle. It's okay to feel sad. Just don't get trapped in one cycle. thanks TBF - I think I was in an up cycle the other day and got way ahead of myself by thinking that dating again would make me feel better. That advice was not realistic for me. Thanks for your thoughts, I have been hurt before and survived, but this one just caught me way off guard from the beginning and then in the end. Link to post Share on other sites
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