orangesean Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 What I want in this thread is if someone knows of other threads or stories of second chance relationships and where the couple has gotten back together and found staying power and to post them here. Because people sometimes hear of second chance relationships and happiness but it's hard to have books on such studies or actual accounts. One thing I noticed about the second chance board here is that it is full of posts where people come in a post like a week after their breakup, sometimes with people who treated them terribly and then they disappear and never speak of their second chance again. I want to know if second chance or reconciled relationships are as elusive as they seem.
dead-dyke Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 I will wait patiently with you. I remember finding loveshack, and first threads I went to, was here. Expecting 1 thing, getting another. Such is life.
quankanne Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 I will wait patiently with you and this is the key to the whole second-chance thing. That doesn't mean you stop going on with your life – you open yourself up to other possibilities and gain the experience you need to mature yourself to be a better-suited mate to the one you're with. do second chances work? If the relationship's meant to be, nothing can keep it from happening – time, distance, space. It will work out, period. I met DH 20 years ago when I was a co-ed, and we were off- and on-again for awhile, but mostly his work outside my state kept us apart. But as I like to teasingly point out, I hunted his butt down and did everything I could to make sure the line of contact was intact while he reaped the benefits of my efforts! Seriously, though, when the signs became apparent after we'd gotten back together, I realized it was worth my effort to stay in touch with him. I dated, but didn't get serious with anyone, and once he committed himself to spending his month-long leave with me when he came home every six months from his job, I focused on us. We got married 16 years ago and haven't looked back. so yeah, second chances do work out, but you have to be sure that this is what you truly want in life, and be willing to work hard to achieve it, and not let yourself get distracted by "what-ifs" ...
sunshinegirl Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 My now-dead relationship was a second chance. We broke up in May 2007, got back together in July 2007, and things ended for good in May 2008. I suppose the odd twist in our first breakup is that it seemed to have *nothing* to do with me or his feelings for me - it was residual stuff related to his divorce. So when he came back 6 weeks later having 'sorted it all out' I didn't question a thing, and I fell back into his arms. And even so, the second chance didn't work.
kizik Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 The more times you try, the less likely it is to work out. We wouldn't break up in the first place if things weren't obviously wrong. Those differences don't ever go away - they get lost in time, sometimes, when reality drifts into loneliness and nostalgia. I think in time my ex will realize what a great guy she threw away, while I will realize what a f*cked up girl I got away from.
AnLandy Posted July 7, 2008 Posted July 7, 2008 A colleague of mine just got married to a woman he had dated in college. They were together for two years, but broke up because she wanted to have children and he didn't. 26 years later, they ran into each other on vacation, started keeping in touch, began a LDR, and eventually got married. He stayed single all these years and accomplished all of his goals in life, while she got married and had four kids. Her husband died of cancer seven years ago. Her last child is about to go to college. They both just decided that since the major difference, having children, had been eliminated by time and circumstance, it was worth giving it another shot. They seem very happy with each other.
Author orangesean Posted July 7, 2008 Author Posted July 7, 2008 Haha, AnLandy that is a hell of a lot of time to pass for someone to get back together! Wow.
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