melissa123 Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Hi all Have just had a REALLY bad day and really need some words of comfort or encouragement to pull me out of this pain right now! To quickly summerise I was with my first ex for 3 years untill he left me for someone else due to the stress of his mother and friends hating me (they were part of a religious group who really didn't accept anyone else) I tried my absolute best with these people but they just wouldn't accept me and would constantly be nasty and rude to me, eventually they convinced him to leave me and that day he got himself a new gf (one within that same group). I was devastated. Life pretty much stopped untill 4 months later I met someone else. He was great to start with, howver after about a month, he started running hot and cold, one day he liked me one day he didn't, some days he was nice, then others rude. One night we were at party and he spent the 1st half of the night all over me then disappeared off with another girl for the rest of the night. This sort of behaviour continued untill he left me for someone else. He treats her like a princess and never did the things he did to me to her. I really don't understand why .... Anyway back to my day ... This is a true story!! I decided to go to the mall with a few friends to take my mine off things, as I walked in through the front doors guess who i bumped into.. My second ex and his new gf. Both were holding hand looking into each others eyes so happily. It completely tore my heart out. She was so beautiful and they both looked so happy. I honestly nearly died. My legs were like jelly and I was shaking like a leaf as I walked past them. I forced myself to smile and say hello but I was in such a state. I was utterly devastated. After about 10 more mintues at the mall I decided I just wanted to go home, the pain really had gotten to me. As I left through the exit, walking through at the same time was my first ex and his gf. I cant even put into words how I felt when I saw this. Again the girl was beautiful and they looked so happy. I went home and just collasped. I cried and cried for hours, I have only just stopped. My heart has been ripped to pieces, it was a big enough blow to be dumped twice for someone else, but to see them both together in the same day looking so happy just devastated me. I feel sick, im still shaking, i really just don't want to be here anymore! It feels like the whole universe is out to get me! I did everything for these guys and tried so hard to make them happy, yet they walk all over me and move on so happily while im left picking up the pieces. Its so tough. Seems almost like I should try being nasty to them as those people seem to get futher than someone who would do anything for anyone else. What else I dont understand is that they didn't treat ne partically well yet when they gte new girlfriends they treat them like queens and never do what they did to me, I really dont understand this. It feels like I was just someone they used while waiting for a better offer to come along and that feeling is awful. Please tell me that im better off without these guys and that things will start to get better! Or just anything to take my mind off what a horrible day I have had. Thanks for reading and please reply with something, anything ...
casey001 Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 Wow sorry to hear about your day! Your story sounds a bit like mine, I had a male who would use the 'hot and cold' behaviour on me also. Its a horrible thing to do to someone and you ARE better off without these males. I don't really know what to say except that it wont always be like this. Your not going to run into your exs and their gfnds everyday and even if you do run into them, soon it will get to a point where your don't care. Keep your chin up, It can only get better from here!!!
mma_j Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 That's a tough day! Sorry to hear that. It's true - you don't need that guy in your life. In fact, the only person you really need is yourself. You may have rushed into that relationship too quickly, which is normal if you're looking for a rebound (or subconsciously looking and don't even realize it). The best thing you can do is, and I'm sure you don't want to hear this, but cry your heart out. Miss everything, write it down, literally make yourself exhausted from sorrow. When you wake up in the morning, you'll feel a tiny bit better (Although you may not realize it). Time will eventually help you, but remember you're the best thing that ever happened to you. There are plenty of other guys out there who would love to date you for who you are. You sound like a sweet girl so just make sure to take care of yourself. It takes time. It's one tough day, but you'll get through it.
Author melissa123 Posted July 6, 2008 Author Posted July 6, 2008 Thanks for your replies! It really was a rough day!!! I know that I shouldn't need a man in my life but I cant help but feeling envious of others in happy relationships. I miss being wanted or I just miss someone caring about me. It hurts alot that those who once cared for me now care for someone else much more and theres absolutly nothing I can do about it. All i can do is sit back and watch. I guess im getting tired and lonely, seems like everyone is with someone right now or atleast has someone who cares about them, not me tho I hate the fact that I care so much for these guys yet they don't care enough about me back to treat me with some decency. What I don't understand is why thy would treat their new partners like queens but not me when I did everything possible to make them happy!?! My first exs new partner has him running around like a slave and is always bickering with him yet he worships the ground she walks on!! I dont understand!!! I just dont know how to act anymore!!! Anyway thanks again for your comments, I really liked the line "you are the best thing that has ever happened to you" so thankyou for that!
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