Why do girls usually go for older guys?

[Brady_to_Moss]

I am 19. it seems girls my age go for guys in the 21-22 range...why is that?

[Trialbyfire]

Not to put you down but generally speaking, men and women mature at different rates and ages. What you'll also find is sometimes there's a cool factor involved with an older guy.

 

While I'm A LOT older than you right now, I still find the older men more attractive. My age bracket has always been somewhere between 5 to 10 years older, even as a teenager/young adult, although back then, I also dated a few guys my age.

[Dark-N-Romantic]

A younger woman told me that most older guys don't have the same hang ups like guys their age. Most tend to be more open about they want and go after it. Less are into playing mind games and are secure with themselves. Most are stable in their lives. And many love the experience that comes from age (physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually (in some cases)). And there are just those who could care less, they love who they love and to Hell with what anyone saids...These are the women I personally respect the most. She and I have several cool dates (she was not for a commitment and it was fine with me, I just loved the experience).

 

 

DNR

[Star Gazer]

Not to put you down but generally speaking, men and women mature at different rates and ages. What you'll also find is sometimes there's a cool factor involved with an older guy.

 

While I'm A LOT older than you right now, I still find the older men more attractive. My age bracket has always been somewhere between 5 to 10 years older, even as a teenager/young adult, although back then, I also dated a few guys my age.

 

Agreed. When I was 19, I dated guys that were 23-24. It wasn't until I was 25-26 and dating a guy in his late 30's that I felt I had finally found someone who was mature.

 

And while 21-22 is technically older than 19, it's not "OLDER" as the term is colloquially used. We're not talkin' about a May-December type thing here.

 

As for this specific age group, a 21 year old can legally buy the gal booze.

[Jake Barnes]

I am 19. it seems girls my age go for guys in the 21-22 range...why is that?

Wait till you're 39. Youll find a lot of them still into the 21-22 age range and it will bother you a lot more, trust me

[Dark-N-Romantic]

Another thing to look at is childbearing...I am 38 and I would prefer to have a younger woman for better chance at having a better chance at having a child with. Plus I think about it like this as well, since most of children spend more time with their mothers than their dads. On a subconscious level, I see it as my children having one us around longer, preferably the mother. Odd yes, but that is how I see things sometimes.

 

 

DNR

[Trialbyfire]

Not that it bothers me that you prefer younger women 'cause it's stage in life v. age in life but you are aware that women live longer than men, aren't you? Just wanted to dispell any fallacies.

[Pedigree]

Another thing to look at is childbearing...I am 38 and I would prefer to have a younger woman for better chance at having a better chance at having a child with. Plus I think about it like this as well, since most of children spend more time with their mothers than their dads. On a subconscious level, I see it as my children having one us around longer, preferably the mother. Odd yes, but that is how I see things sometimes.

 

 

DNR

 

That would be biology.

 

Being 20 and still studying, I do find it quiet disheartening to see girls (who you know) showing up at uni parties with guys who clearly just finished their 9-5 office job. You start thinking, how the hell do you even begin to match up to that?

[mixwell]

I'm in the same situation right now. I am 25 and I'm seeing a girl that is 19 and she told me she refuses to date anyone her age just because of the immaturity level. A woman sees an older male as being more of a man and feel that by mid 20s a man has his life in order and is more stable than a teenager.

[confused and broken]

I always seem to be attracted to older guys too........

BUT I think this is a question women seriously need to contemplate

On average men die younger than women.....so if you pick on older man that means on average you will end up spending more years on your own

If you pick a younger guy you have a better chance of really spending your whole life with them.....

Just a thought

[Trialbyfire]

I'm speaking in generalities but at a younger age, many men mature more slowly so women seek older men. At around 40, it appears that times are changing, in that many women are now looking for younger men, which makes sense considering the reduced fertility in one party and the lifespan differences between genders.

[Jake Barnes]

I'm speaking in generalities but at a younger age, many men mature more slowly so women seek older men. At around 40, it appears that times are changing, in that many women are now looking for younger men, which makes sense considering the reduced fertility in one party and the lifespan differences between genders.

I think you mean reduced libido

 

Women actually have reduced fertility before men I think. Not sure though

[Samari]

That would be biology.

 

Being 20 and still studying, I do find it quiet disheartening to see girls (who you know) showing up at uni parties with guys who clearly just finished their 9-5 office job. You start thinking, how the hell do you even begin to match up to that?

Hahaha, so true.

[FormerNiceGuy]

I am 19. it seems girls my age go for guys in the 21-22 range...why is that?

 

Women from ages 21to 25 will rarely go with guys that are 2 years younger than them.

 

But after 25, the rules change.

 

Don't complain about it so much, because when you become older you'll have the luxury of being with beautiful, young women. Just keep your game up and be confident and ambitious and go somwhere in life and will women want to go where you go.

[Dark-N-Romantic]

That would be biology.

 

Being 20 and still studying, I do find it quiet disheartening to see girls (who you know) showing up at uni parties with guys who clearly just finished their 9-5 office job. You start thinking, how the hell do you even begin to match up to that?

 

Yes biology in our choices of mates plays much of a role as personality choices, financial outlook, long and short term goals, sexual attraction, etc. The only difference is the level or degrees of their importance varies from person to person and between individual couples. I mean if one wants a child and to raise a family, should they not be concerned with the fertility of their partner as much as if the partner's affections towards them? If one is concerned about their financial stability with the partner because they want to have a house one day or retire in South America, it is logical that one also look at their partner's commitment to such a financial goal as they do their sex life (unless one is using their sex as a means for finance, sex is not going to pay for a house or that retirement dream).

 

But see, this is why I said in another thread dealing with people who put their noses where they shouldn't. Such people need to...

 

A) Get a life.

B) Stop looking at someone else and get their own SO/spouse/sex life or whatever.

 

This is why such debates and superficial and trivial concerns persist today. I mean, if we want to start talking about and feel grossed out about someone who dates someone who is older than them, why not (and yes I know it does happen) start...

 

A) Doing such things about someone who decides to fall in love with someone fatter or skinner than they are?

B) Someone who is of the same sex or even different sex than they are.

C) Someone who is is taller than someone else is.

D) Or knit people who are involved with people who has a different fashion sense?

 

All of these silly concerns are what lead to some of the issues concerning dating and marriage and other intimate issues. While yes, I tell those who ask me what they should do, I tell them give the person of their dreams the kiss and grope of a lifetime right in front of such prejudice, be happy, and then go to places where such ignorance won't have the stupidity to raise its ugly head. There are too many other things to deal with in a relationship that should be more of a concern than the unimportant comments and limited views of others. This is what their main concerns should be...1) Do I love them and am I wiling to love my partner as he or she desires and deserves to be loved? 2)Is my partner is doing the same on to me in return. 3) Just what do we want of this relationship and can we stay on the same page? and 4) Are we truly happy?

 

There is always going to be idiots and uninvolved minds out there that is going to interject its prejudice thoughts. There always going to be those who are incapable to grasp the higher concepts of love. Those who are jealous because someone is able to and willing to go beyond the limiting bonds of this superficial, materialistic world. Especially those who have not even crossed that line (Who are they to judge what is not right?) or who could not have possibly dated or married every so in so in the book.

 

There are people who are good and bad in all aspects of. There are relationships that work because people have the right chemistry and are willing to put in the effort it takes to make it work. And there are many that don't. More people need to get off of their high horse and keep their mouths shut so they don't look stupid with their prejudice. The only concerns we should have is if they are treating each other right not why they are attracted to each other (well at least not on the superficial live that most people deal with).

 

 

DNR

If the world were to change its mindset on a lot of the stupid stuff it lets concern it, it would be a bit more tolerant and happy place.

[Dark-N-Romantic]

I have a few question for both the OP and anyone who really thinks something like age, difference in salary, racial makeup, etc. is important in an relationship...

 

1) Why do you care?

2) What is it about a HAPPY couple's relationship where such things you find important is so blatantly not a issue for the couple so disturbing or off-putting?

3) Have you ever tried a relationship of such a mix-matched proportion?

4) Is it possible the bitterness from such a failed relationship (either because it was you or because it was someone you held dear) of such a nature could play a part in your apprehension of where and how others find love?

 

To me, it seems a lot of nay sayers have their own prejudices and issues they need to work out instead of poorly upon others that do not fall within their own universe of understanding and acceptance.

 

 

DNR

[stillafool]

I am 19. it seems girls my age go for guys in the 21-22 range...why is that?

 

I don't understand this. There's no big age difference between 19 and 22. Most girls go for guys 2 to 3 years older than them. This is perfectly normal. If she were 19 and dating a 40 year old I could better understand your question. What age guy do you think a 19 year should date and why do you ask?

[Trialbyfire]

I think you mean reduced libido

 

Women actually have reduced fertility before men I think. Not sure though

In reference to the reduced fertility comment, I was talking about women. If you consider that younger men would have an increased fertility rate, combined with the perks of an increased libido, biologically speaking, it makes sense for an older woman to be interested in a younger man. The reverse would hold true for an older man v. a younger woman.

 

Truth be told, I doubt I would be a woman like that when I hit my forties and older but who knows. Drive will tell.

[Shygirl15]

Why do girls usually go for older guys?

 

They are more matured, obviously. Who wants to babysit.

 

I have never dated anyone less than 5 years older than me. I also just recently decided that I will not date 'last borns' as they also tend to behave immature even if they're 50yo.

[fral945]

I'm in the same situation right now. I am 25 and I'm seeing a girl that is 19 and she told me she refuses to date anyone her age just because of the immaturity level. A woman sees an older male as being more of a man and feel that by mid 20s a man has his life in order and is more stable than a teenager.

 

I've been told the same thing by a girl I dated who was 22 (I am 28). However, she turned out not to be very mature herself.

 

Trust me when I tell you this, 19 to 22 is a BIG jump maturity wise. I wouldn't go below 21 myself because it's highly unlikely any of those girls will have anything to offer me relationship wise (other than great sex ). Most have no clue how to handle the difficulties of life or manage priorities.

[Shygirl15]

I've been told the same thing by a girl I dated who was 22 (I am 28). However, she turned out not to be very mature herself.

 

Which is why she needed an older guy (you) by her side, to help her transitioning into the matured level.

 

No woman is matured at 22.

[t_veron]

I'm speaking in generalities but at a younger age, many men mature more slowly so women seek older men. At around 40, it appears that times are changing, in that many women are now looking for younger men, which makes sense considering the reduced fertility in one party and the lifespan differences between genders.

 

So tired of hearing this. It's absolute crap. Men and women do mature differently but women are in no way more mature. The differences are in general women mature more leaning towards building relationships/family so they are less scared then men taking that step. Men mature more leaning towards building a nest and securing a future. Statistics don't lie so it's sad we can't accept two people with different strengths make a good team.

 

Other than that younger women like older men for the same reason younger men like older women:

 

1. Older people have money and can take you to more places.

2. Have experience in the sack so you can learn a few things.

3. Offer security and stability to your drama filled life.

4. Offer a source to learn about life from which your younger crowd can't.

[Krytie TV]

I am 19. it seems girls my age go for guys in the 21-22 range...why is that?

 

Because at 19 we are at our peak stupidness.

[Trialbyfire]

So tired of hearing this. It's absolute crap. Men and women do mature differently but women are in no way more mature. The differences are in general women mature more leaning towards building relationships/family so they are less scared then men taking that step. Men mature more leaning towards building a nest and securing a future. Statistics don't lie so it's sad we can't accept two people with different strengths make a good team.

 

Other than that younger women like older men for the same reason younger men like older women:

 

1. Older people have money and can take you to more places.

2. Have experience in the sack so you can learn a few things.

3. Offer security and stability to your drama filled life.

4. Offer a source to learn about life from which your younger crowd can't.

The only part I agree with is #4, since we're semanticating our responses...

[kory11]

I have a question then... I am also 19 and I've noticed that women my age like older men...

I don't want to date younger 'girls'... am I stuck in a 'no-date' situation? hehe