annieo Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Got the idea for this when I went off topic on another thread (oops, sorry all). Which gender do you think is easier to fathom (thanks Mr. Lucky for the awesome word root)? Generally, not on a case by case basis. I think the prevailing belief is that women are inscrutable mysteries, even to themselves half the time, and men are simple, uncomplicated folk who say what they mean and mean what they say. Sort of silly, very retro, gender wars kind of question, but I think it speaks to many of the preconceptions that we have about the other gender's communication style. And I'm curious to hear what other people think (I'll keep my opinion to myself for now).
LakesideDream Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Got the idea for this when I went off topic on another thread (oops, sorry all). Which gender do you think is easier to fathom (thanks Mr. Lucky for the awesome word root)? Generally, not on a case by case basis. I think the prevailing belief is that women are inscrutable mysteries, even to themselves half the time, and men are simple, uncomplicated folk who say what they mean and mean what they say. Sort of silly, very retro, gender wars kind of question, but I think it speaks to many of the preconceptions that we have about the other gender's communication style. And I'm curious to hear what other people think (I'll keep my opinion to myself for now). I doubt there will be much argument here. The answer is women. While men are capable of all kinds of mis-direction and deception, they are not good at hiding their emotions. Women on the other hand are certainly inscrutable mysteries. By and large, a man is expect to read the mind of his mate for a relationship to succeed... or, just agree with everything.
Lizzie60 Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 I would say that women are easier to read... they are more emotional, more 'clingy', more needy, more 'doormatsy' in general... they are the ones who will do the first steps, after a break-up..(first call, first text message, etc.) Men are harder to read.. we never know if they are interested as much as we are.. IMO.. is he going to call... what is he thinking,.. does he loves me.. is he interested... (from all the posts here) From the posts here I would say women are easier to read.. in general.
OpenBook Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 I would say that women are easier to read... they are more emotional, more 'clingy', more needy, more 'doormatsy' in general... they are the ones who will do the first steps, after a break-up..(first call, first text message, etc.) Men are harder to read.. we never know if they are interested as much as we are.. IMO.. is he going to call... what is he thinking,.. does he loves me.. is he interested... (from all the posts here) From the posts here I would say women are easier to read.. in general. I strongly disagree. Men are nothing if not consistent. You do X, he'll do Y. I'll never understand WHY they do what they do... but it's pretty easy to peg WHAT they'll do.
2sunny Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 hands down - men... straight forward and no games... i always said i think like a man. i say what i mean and mean what i say. men are simple... they generally are three things: hungry tired horny predictable really...
tanbark813 Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 In general I would say men but women have a harder time reading men than men do. A man can drive in a car for half an hour and not say a single word to his guy friend and neither will question if anything is wrong, nor will anything actually be wrong. But if that man drives for half an hour with his SO and doesn't say a single word, her head will burst thinking of things that could possibly be wrong.
carhill Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 OTOH, and proving that stereotypes should be shot and buried, some men, like myself, are impossible to read. I have to provide women an instruction manual men are simple... they generally are three things: hungry tired horny predictable really... Yes, very predictable, except you just described my wife Truthfully, I think women prefer simple men, and, proving this, even with her personality type, my wife has lamented more than once in MC she wishes I were a "normal guy". Sorry to disappoint you babe, but my journey in life is going to be anything but "normal"
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Most men are easier to read. Women are not as hard as you may think though. You just have to learn to ask the right questions.
Author annieo Posted July 3, 2008 Author Posted July 3, 2008 OTOH, and proving that stereotypes should be shot and buried, some men, like myself, are impossible to read. I have to provide women an instruction manual Yes, very predictable, except you just described my wife Truthfully, I think women prefer simple men, and, proving this, even with her personality type, my wife has lamented more than once in MC she wishes I were a "normal guy". Sorry to disappoint you babe, but my journey in life is going to be anything but "normal" you sound pretty interesting, carhill.
Author annieo Posted July 3, 2008 Author Posted July 3, 2008 I would say that women are easier to read... they are more emotional, more 'clingy', more needy, more 'doormatsy' in general... they are the ones who will do the first steps, after a break-up..(first call, first text message, etc.) Men are harder to read.. we never know if they are interested as much as we are.. IMO.. is he going to call... what is he thinking,.. does he loves me.. is he interested... (from all the posts here) From the posts here I would say women are easier to read.. in general. While I do agree (now I'm showing my hand) that women are the easiest to read, I think that the doormatsy (love that types are probably the most obscure. You, Lizzie, from reading your posts, are no doormat, and read like a book, a really interesting, raunchy book
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 While I do agree (now I'm showing my hand) that women are the easiest to read, I think that the doormatsy (love that types are probably the most obscure. You, Lizzie, from reading your posts, are no doormat, and read like a book, a really interesting, raunchy book Substitute doormatsy for passive aggressive... I think that is a more accurate description. Lizzie is a book I would not want to read.
Trialbyfire Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 I think both genders are difficult to read during the first part of any relationship, since neither one is acting in a rational manner. Hormones before gray matter...
monkey00 Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Tricky question. I'll lean more towards the woman side. Sometimes things could be going wrong and the woman might expect the guy to read her mind and know what the problem is like some fairy tale. What did he forget to buy her dinner, kiss her goodnight, not notice her new hairdo, or take out the trash? I think any sex will likely find their counterpart to be hard to read - hence men are from mars and women are from venus.
Trialbyfire Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 To add to my post about the first part of a relationship, I'd like to offer the definition of Hysteria:Behavior exhibiting excessive or uncontrollable emotion, such as fear or panic.A mental disorder characterized by emotional excitability and sometimes by amnesia or a physical deficit, such as paralysis, or a sensory deficit, without an organic cause.Do you see the parallel? No wonder neither gender can read each other!
Jersey Shortie Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 I don't think either sex is easier to read. Both manage situations and address them differently. Communication styles on both ends leave alot of room for theory on the opposite gender. I don't agree that men are more straight forward and honest then women either. The threads here are reason enough to think that. I also don't really know if I agree that men are "simple". They might be a little less complicated in their methods, but I think alot of men have alot going on under the surface that is never expressed.
Woggle Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Men hands down. You do X and they will do Y. With women you do X and god knows what they will do and what they will do depends on how they are feeling at the moment and that can change at the drop of a dime. This is why I don't understand women who have relationship problems. Men are a walk in the park compared to women.
Dark-N-Romantic Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Because of our perceived and actively persuaded differences, both men and women are easy to read and hard at the same time. For example, it is hard for me to read if a woman likes me or not if she is not touching me the right way or directly informs me of her interest. Women have told me they don't get me. They read my poetry, yet I am closed and mysterious. But, however, they know when I am serious about something and can totally read me when I put my attention to something. And vice versa. It all depends on... 1) Who is doing the reading and their skills at interpretation. 2) Who is being read and their willingness to be open to be read. DNR
OWoman Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 I think structurally women are (or used to be - this may be changing) raised to be more indirect than men - whereas men are typically raised to state what they want and get to the point, and have some expectation that if they can explain logically what it is and why they want it that they'll get it.... women are typically raised without that sense of entitlement or expectation. Mothers teach little girls - by example if not directly - how to wrap daddy around their fingers by simpering and cooing and acting little girlsy, and they learn that indirect means are more effective than direct means. So, many women have a hard time communicating directly because they've learned that that's not the most effective strategy. Does that make them more difficult than men to read in a relationship? I tend to agree with Lizzie on that - stereotypically, the range is limited. It's pretty easy to predict or read what's going on. But the stereotypical man is pretty easy to read too, even if the range is a bit broader than the stereotypical women's reassure me reassure me reassure me. That said, I've been shown often enough on LS I'm not a stereotypical woman, and the guys I go for are not stereotypical men, so perhaps my response is also atypical?
torranceshipman Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 For women, its men, for men, its women! We're a mystery to eachother Thank God for Loveshack where we can come out and ask people what the heck is going on...haha!
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