sas218 Posted July 2, 2008 Posted July 2, 2008 I am struggling to get over my ex. My head tells me this is for the best but my heart is killing me. I will give you some background on the situation. I met my ex almost two years ago. He is four years younger than me and I didnt think it was a good idea to date, so we became close friends. He was really the first guy to give me any attention and the friendship grew quickly into love and we started dating 9 months after we met. This was my first real dating relationship and the first person that I have ever loved. The relationship was progressing really well and I lost virginity to him three months after we started dating. We had our one year anniversary in April. We really loved each other but we had our ups and downs as every relationship does. Then a month after our anniversary, he just called it quits. He said that I deserved better than him right now and that he hoped we would get back together someday. He also said that he was holding me back from settling down and having kids. He just needed some time to figure out his life. We still talked and saw each other occasionally. It has been two months since we broke up and I just found out last week that he has been sleeping with one of his friends. They aren't dating he doesnt want to be in a relationship right now but they have the friends with benefits thing. This girl is really different than me. My ex had some troubles during his childhood and had told me that dating me made him believe that he could be a better person. This girl is the old kind of girl that he would have been with. I just found out yesterday that this new girl might be pregnant even though he wasnt sure he even wanted kids and that was one of the reasons he ended it with me. By the way she already has a baby from a previous relationship. I am physically sick over all this. I feel like I have lost so much (my first everything and my best friend). I dont know what to do without him. How do I get over all this and move on. I dont have a lot of friends besides him and I am not the kind of girl that goes out and meets people. I just want to stop hurting and get over this guy. I want to not think about him or our relationship anymore but it seems to consume me. I need help to stop dwelling on this and to just be happy. I have started exercising and hanging out with a few friends. What else is there to do?
backto1 Posted July 2, 2008 Posted July 2, 2008 Exercising and hanging with your friends is a GREAT start. It feels like so little right now because you probably don't get much satisfaction from it and still have to go home to an empty house. But keep at it! The small things of working out / hanging with friends turn from a "get your mind off him for a few hours thing" into bigger things with greater possibilities like building your self image, becoming healthier, expanding your friends network and one day meeting someone new. It feels like a cheap, temporary escape for now but that's ok - these things you're doing will build upon themselves and turn into much bigger things in the future.
CailinPig Posted July 3, 2008 Posted July 3, 2008 Sas, You and I are in the same boat. He was almost three years younger than me, I'd a prob with it bu t we eventually got together and two and a half years later broke up. He was my first everything too. It does get better. I understand what you feel cos |I went through that too. it gets better. He wasn't right for you/ If he'd been right for you, he'd have stayed around. You're going through a rough time but don't worry, it gets better
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