confused and broken Posted June 29, 2008 Posted June 29, 2008 I fell for this guy last summer, and we started dating........everything was going great except he would sometimes neglect to call me which drove me crazy One weekend after not hearing from him I checked out his facebook site because I wanted to know what was up with him, and realized he was flirting with another girl I called him that night and ended up leaving him a message saying that he should have broken up with me instead of just ignoring me I never got over him for some reason, and then he ended up contacting me, a few times. One time when I was really lonely I went to see him, and then things got more ridiculous between us... until I got so mad at him for asking me on a date and then just vanishing that I told him that I never wanted to talk to him again a while later he contacted me and I told him we could only be friends. The friends ordeal was difficult because he would agree to it and then pounce on me (plus I was still not over him) A couple days ago he asked me to a movie just as friends, and then ended up telling me he wanted to date me and that he was different now he wanted companionship and to spend his life with someone and he knew I was different from all of the other girls I was extremely hesitant and told him that he had already broken my heart too many times, but he was persistent and I couldn't resist he said he would phone me the next night and set a date with me the next night he did phone and we ended up hanging out the next night... I was late because of work and called him also I told him I couldn't stay out too late because I had to work the next morning When I got to his house one of his buddies was there which was kind of strange and then everything was awkward because of our past later that night his friend called and he said oh yeah ill come over @ 11 then he just wanted to get it on, and after the deed was done he said I thought you had to work early tomorrow so I told my friend I would meet him so you can either leave or come watch us play video games ... so I got up and left Then he chased after me and told me to cut him some slack I went home and emailed him a ridiculous e-mail telling him to get real Sorry this is so long I guess I just want to know what my problem is and my best course of action thanking anyone who bothers to read this and respond in advance
Author confused and broken Posted June 29, 2008 Author Posted June 29, 2008 and I am just curious was I in the right to be upset??
dead-dyke Posted June 30, 2008 Posted June 30, 2008 You have every right to be upset. I would drop him like a bad habit. Just curious though, how old are you guys?/ regardless though, he does'nt have an ounce of respect 4 u.
stillafool Posted June 30, 2008 Posted June 30, 2008 I'm curious how old you are also. It seems you say a lot of things you don't mean from your post. You said you just want to be friends with this guy but you know you feel more than that. You said you had to get home early because you had to work but got angry when he let you go. If I were him I would be so confused I wouldn't know what to do.
critter909 Posted June 30, 2008 Posted June 30, 2008 If you still have feelings for the guy it will be almost impossible to be "just friends." I agree with you that you should be cautious in approaching a relationship with him becasue of your past history. Take it real slow and just go on some dates. I don't know how offended you should be about him making plans with a friend later in the evening since you did tell him you would be going home early. It's a touch rude maybe but not unreasonable on his part.
Author confused and broken Posted July 2, 2008 Author Posted July 2, 2008 I am 27 and he is 30............ I am curious why this question came up twice..any explanation would be interesting... I am trying to go on NC..... I think any thing he does at this point justs hurts because I am hurt........... I guess you could say for some reason I have been addicted to this make up break up relationship.... I really want to move on I feel like such a looser for being part of it for so long... I guess I just really want to be loved
dead-dyke Posted July 2, 2008 Posted July 2, 2008 I understand your feelings about wanting to be loved, but him telling you he has changed after a few days? I've been separated from my wife for a year, and I'm not sure I've changed sufficiently, along w/ her. If you do decide to end it w/ him for a while, really, really, drop off the face of the earth, if at all possible. He sounds like he's using you for a quick ride and then he's out. If he really values your companionship, your silence will speak volumes, and then he will, or he won't understand what he is losing. But I would go invisible for at least a few months, which WILL feel like years. It's always easier said than done, but you really should put your foot down. Of course I could be wrong, not knowing the dynamics of the sitch, but also look who's giving you advice. A guy separated from his wife for a year. The reason I asked your age is the way he "forgets" to call for the date, the video games, the facebook, (which I hate) and the on and off thing again, and again. It just seems, and I don't want to offend, but, a little "young". I hope it works out for you.
stillafool Posted July 2, 2008 Posted July 2, 2008 I am 27 and he is 30............ I am curious why this question came up twice..any explanation would be interesting... Because you seem to say things to him you don't mean. Like you have to go home early because of work, yet you were angry when he made plans with his friend. I thought you guys were teenagers.
Author confused and broken Posted July 2, 2008 Author Posted July 2, 2008 Because you seem to say things to him you don't mean. Like you have to go home early because of work, yet you were angry when he made plans with his friend. I thought you guys were teenagers. Yeah this relationship has been extremely immature.......and I hate to admit it but obviously on both parts The reason I told him I only wanted to be friends is because I was sick of getting my heart broken, and I really enjoyed being his friend... I guess I am just learning that there is no way that is possible... The reason that I told him I had to go home early because of work is because our routine has been to screw until 2 am I don't care if a guy hangs out with his friends but, I don't like being double booked and QUESTION: If a guy has just 2 nights before poured his heart out to you begging you to give him another chance... wouldn't he only be thinking about the time you were going to spend together... Maybe Not I guess I was looking at it from my point of view it was a friday night and my phone was full of messages asking me to hang out as well, but I never even considered it and I never would... One thing I have tried to tell him before is that there is nothing wrong with him he is just not compatible with me... I want more Is that to much to ask] Maybe in some ways I was testing him because I don't trust him... Even though I am 27 I don't have a lot of dating experience From the time I was 18 till I was 24 I was in a serious relationship... Then I really didn't start dating again till I was 25 Then I spent a year screwing around literally And then I have been in this pathetic mess... I am totally concerned about the fact that obviously I was playing games too I want to someday be in a healthy relationship, but no longer know if that exists
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