Peter_pan Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 hey people thought i would start a thread here, this is related to http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t156363/ well to shorten it all up, around xmas time the "ex" left me for her bar manager, she changed her job, me and address all in a few short weeks. (we where each others 1st love had been together for 3yrs lived together for nearly a year and a half) all she ever said was that she has "changed" and she would be lying to herself as her feelings had changed and "its not what I want anymore" and that she wants me to move on and be happy. she said she still wanted to be in contact but i let her know i was to hurt to and upset do so, so unless i had moved on then i couldn't, and wished her luck and left her to it. She did txt me twice after that phone call, one was asking if the shop i worked in sold a particular cable. I did not reply. the second about a week later saying, you need to seriously change your bank details so the new people at the old address dont get your details. I replied to this one and said yes i have. then asked what she was up to and if she fancied meeting up. she said she was getting a hair cut. I knew she didnt want to meet up. so i replied before she did and said dont worry actually im busy now anyway, can i call you later? she said erm, ok. if you want. I didnt and thats the last i heard of her. well its been tough to say the least. Ive not seen or heard from her in over 5 months. the last time i saw her was when i caught her in town wrapped round his arms, just after i got off holiday around early feb. anyway, she isnt with him as far as ive been informed through a friend of mine. He told me they kept arguing or something and he left her because he couldn't trust her and didn't want her to cheat on him. This was 2 weeks ago. Everything she changed as far as i can see didnt work out for her.... she no longer works at the night club, she changed uni course, her friends didnt move in with her as planned and now she isn't with him. i did break the NC a while back to see how she was (and i guess i was looking for answers, or to put her under the spot light and release some of my thoughts, since at the time i was so upset i felt i needed to say something). the last txt i sent said, hey I'm moving soon and so may not see you again would be good to see you before i go. She didnt reply and later found out it was because she had fallen out with him and wasnt speaking to anyone this was about a month and a half ago. since then she has come back to my home town and spoke to my best mate and told him she had lost my number, asked him if i was moving back up there or not, told him they weren't together anymore and that she is playing the single game now. and i just thought earlier that its bull that she lost my number as i did txt her and i know she got it, since the same friend that she went and spoke to also spoke to her brother and he had said she got the messages from me and was confused. therefore I believe she is trying to find out what im up to. and i dont know what the idea of my thread is but thanks for reading, and support and opinions would be kool
northstar1 Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 hey people thought i would start a thread here, this is related to http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t156363/ well to shorten it all up, around xmas time the "ex" left me for her bar manager, she changed her job, me and address all in a few short weeks. (we where each others 1st love had been together for 3yrs lived together for nearly a year and a half) all she ever said was that she has "changed" and she would be lying to herself as her feelings had changed and "its not what I want anymore" and that she wants me to move on and be happy. she said she still wanted to be in contact but i let her know i was to hurt to and upset do so, so unless i had moved on then i couldn't, and wished her luck and left her to it. She did txt me twice after that phone call, one was asking if the shop i worked in sold a particular cable. I did not reply. the second about a week later saying, you need to seriously change your bank details so the new people at the old address dont get your details. I replied to this one and said yes i have. then asked what she was up to and if she fancied meeting up. she said she was getting a hair cut. I knew she didnt want to meet up. so i replied before she did and said dont worry actually im busy now anyway, can i call you later? she said erm, ok. if you want. I didnt and thats the last i heard of her. well its been tough to say the least. Ive not seen or heard from her in over 5 months. the last time i saw her was when i caught her in town wrapped round his arms, just after i got off holiday around early feb. anyway, she isnt with him as far as ive been informed through a friend of mine. He told me they kept arguing or something and he left her because he couldn't trust her and didn't want her to cheat on him. This was 2 weeks ago. Everything she changed as far as i can see didnt work out for her.... she no longer works at the night club, she changed uni course, her friends didnt move in with her as planned and now she isn't with him. i did break the NC a while back to see how she was (and i guess i was looking for answers, or to put her under the spot light and release some of my thoughts, since at the time i was so upset i felt i needed to say something). the last txt i sent said, hey I'm moving soon and so may not see you again would be good to see you before i go. She didnt reply and later found out it was because she had fallen out with him and wasnt speaking to anyone this was about a month and a half ago. since then she has come back to my home town and spoke to my best mate and told him she had lost my number, asked him if i was moving back up there or not, told him they weren't together anymore and that she is playing the single game now. and i just thought earlier that its bull that she lost my number as i did txt her and i know she got it, since the same friend that she went and spoke to also spoke to her brother and he had said she got the messages from me and was confused. therefore I believe she is trying to find out what im up to. and i dont know what the idea of my thread is but thanks for reading, and support and opinions would be kool Doesn't seem like she knows what she wants - however, at this point, that shoudln't be your worry. You are moving on with your life and she's not part of it. If you truly want to get over her, you need to stop being in any contact with her.
PandaStillLovesBunny Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 Here's a tip - if she says she's changed, it doesn't mean she's not a total flake anymore, or that she's learned that a relationship takes commitment and responsibility; it means that she's decided to start listening to different music or wearing her hair differently. You tried, and she didn't feel it was worth it then, so it's not worth it now. She wants something from you, but it sure as hell isn't love.
Author Peter_pan Posted June 28, 2008 Author Posted June 28, 2008 not a total flake, what do you mean by this? northstar; i am and its hard. And annoyingly i cant ever escape her. she used to live here to and her friends still live here and talk to people i know. so I hear bits and bobs now and again and it really annoys me because i never get the full story. she did come down to visit her parents but didnt bother to contact me then even though she isnt with him no more. so dont know what thats about. was i a bad person for ignoring her and not staying in touch
northstar1 Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 not a total flake, what do you mean by this? northstar; i am and its hard. And annoyingly i cant ever escape her. she used to live here to and her friends still live here and talk to people i know. so I hear bits and bobs now and again and it really annoys me because i never get the full story. she did come down to visit her parents but didnt bother to contact me then even though she isnt with him no more. so dont know what thats about. was i a bad person for ignoring her and not staying in touch You probably dont' want the full story. At this point you don't want to concern yourself with anything in her life. You can't have it both ways - you can't want to know about what she's up to, but also ignore her. You need to just worry about your own life and let her live hers. If your paths cross at some point in the future, so be it.
FauxVowel Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 hey People Thought I Would Start A Thread Here, This Is Related To http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t156363/ Well To Shorten It All Up, Around Xmas Time The "ex" Left Me For Her Bar Manager, She Changed Her Job, Me And Address All In A Few Short Weeks. (we Where Each Others 1st Love Had Been Together For 3yrs Lived Together For Nearly A Year And A Half) All She Ever Said Was That She Has "changed" And She Would Be Lying To Herself As Her Feelings Had Changed And "its Not What I Want Anymore" And That She Wants Me To Move On And Be Happy. She Said She Still Wanted To Be In Contact But I Let Her Know I Was To Hurt To And Upset Do So, So Unless I Had Moved On Then I Couldn't, And Wished Her Luck And Left Her To It. She Did Txt Me Twice After That Phone Call, One Was Asking If The Shop I Worked In Sold A Particular Cable. I Did Not Reply. The Second About A Week Later Saying, You Need To Seriously Change Your Bank Details So The New People At The Old Address Dont Get Your Details. I Replied To This One And Said Yes I Have. Then Asked What She Was Up To And If She Fancied Meeting Up. She Said She Was Getting A Hair Cut. I Knew She Didnt Want To Meet Up. So I Replied Before She Did And Said Dont Worry Actually Im Busy Now Anyway, Can I Call You Later? She Said Erm, Ok. If You Want. I Didnt And Thats The Last I Heard Of Her. Well Its Been Tough To Say The Least. Ive Not Seen Or Heard From Her In Over 5 Months. The Last Time I Saw Her Was When I Caught Her In Town Wrapped Round His Arms, Just After I Got Off Holiday Around Early Feb. Anyway, She Isnt With Him As Far As Ive Been Informed Through A Friend Of Mine. He Told Me They Kept Arguing Or Something And He Left Her Because He Couldn't Trust Her And Didn't Want Her To Cheat On Him. This Was 2 Weeks Ago. Everything She Changed As Far As I Can See Didnt Work Out For Her.... She No Longer Works At The Night Club, She Changed Uni Course, Her Friends Didnt Move In With Her As Planned And Now She Isn't With Him. I Did Break The Nc A While Back To See How She Was (and I Guess I Was Looking For Answers, Or To Put Her Under The Spot Light And Release Some Of My Thoughts, Since At The Time I Was So Upset I Felt I Needed To Say Something). The Last Txt I Sent Said, Hey I'm Moving Soon And So May Not See You Again Would Be Good To See You Before I Go. She Didnt Reply And Later Found Out It Was Because She Had Fallen Out With Him And Wasnt Speaking To Anyone This Was About A Month And A Half Ago. Since Then She Has Come Back To My Home Town And Spoke To My Best Mate And Told Him She Had Lost My Number, Asked Him If I Was Moving Back Up There Or Not, Told Him They Weren't Together Anymore And That She Is Playing The Single Game Now. And I Just Thought Earlier That Its Bull That She Lost My Number As I Did Txt Her And I Know She Got It, Since The Same Friend That She Went And Spoke To Also Spoke To Her Brother And He Had Said She Got The Messages From Me And Was Confused. Therefore I Believe She Is Trying To Find Out What Im Up To. And I Dont Know What The Idea Of My Thread Is But Thanks For Reading, And Support And Opinions Would Be Kool <High Five> YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111111111111111111 **** HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111111 NEVER SPEAK TO HER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111111111111
kizik Posted June 28, 2008 Posted June 28, 2008 Soon enough you will realize this girl is an awful person. Go ahead and take her off that pedestal. There are other girls, but there are 10 guys for every girl, so be prepared to be single for a while. Like, a long time. Years. That's what I'm mentally preparing myself for. And it's all about being by yourself, doing things for yourself, having no "cheerleader" behind you approving or disapproving your decisions.
Author Peter_pan Posted June 29, 2008 Author Posted June 29, 2008 yeah i am preparing myself, im not exactly bad looking, i have a good body and work out everyday. but i know its a fight. and yeah saying **** her is easier said than done as i still love her. And i feel as though i pushed her away. i would LOVE to know why she isnt speaking to me
FauxVowel Posted June 29, 2008 Posted June 29, 2008 yeah i am preparing myself, im not exactly bad looking, i have a good body and work out everyday. but i know its a fight. and yeah saying **** her is easier said than done as i still love her. And i feel as though i pushed her away. i would LOVE to know why she isnt speaking to me Yeah, I love my (ex)bitch too, but you know what? **** HER.
Author Peter_pan Posted June 29, 2008 Author Posted June 29, 2008 would it be bad to break the NC now...? since things didnt work out for her and she isnt with him? i dont get why she is the one ignoring me
FauxVowel Posted June 29, 2008 Posted June 29, 2008 would it be bad to break the NC now...? since things didnt work out for her and she isnt with him? i dont get why she is the one ignoring me Oh, things didn't work out for her, after she freaking LEFT you for someone else. What a shame. **** HER.
Author Peter_pan Posted June 29, 2008 Author Posted June 29, 2008 i still hear you but maybe she didnt technically leave me for someone else? because.... we where having bad times (arguing about domestic stuff) so decided to say lets be FWB (give each other some space) whilst living together , this went on for a month, then she was looking at flats to buy. i went with her to view them, she even asked me to move in with her and i felt really good as we where having a better time and we where buying each other nice gifts for christmas. but i wasnt sure of my feelings on whether we should live together right away ( big mistake) anyway, she then got that job at that club and I noticed she started to change. she kept mentioning this guy. I had tried asking for her back in person but she would always get angry when i tried to speak to her. she would say its not what she wants. and thats all she would say pretty much. Then once i had moved out i asked for her back and talked about all the good times in a nice email etc explaining everything and basically trying to get to the bottom of why she didnt want to be back together and sort of hinting at her telling me the truth behind her and that guy. I asked if we could work it out and start fresh. but it was to late. she had obviously made up her mind and then didnt want me once she liked this guy this guy. then literally a few weeks after i had moved out and went away to france she drops the bomb and replies to my email saying. i think we will always be happier on our own or with someone else or whatever and i want you to know im seeing him now.... but have fun and live your life. i mean wtf.
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