ac79 Posted June 25, 2008 Posted June 25, 2008 here we go, my partner left 1 mnth to the day ( im male) she just said she was going for the night. before she left we had a few problems but nothing really significant. she started working alot which she has never done before. she is 22 & im 29 so she had our daughter at 17. she has mental health issues although never diagnosed she is on 100 mg of zoloft & smokes 1/2 ounce of weed a week. during the first week of her leavign there was minimal contact between us & her & our duaghter.then secong week she came back for the weekend & said she was making an effort. from the beginning she said she just needs a break from me & our daughter. i asked her if there was some one else & she said no. i beleive her since she has had no sex drive for some time due to weed & meds. she did cheat 2 yrs ago but told me straight away. if she was seeing someone wouldnt that ve an easy exit for her. the second weekend she stayed over fri,sat & sunday. we even went out as a cpl & she said she wanted to make it work. then the next day she said its over. i went to her work the next day & she didnt want to talk 2 me, i said do you need more time she said" i asked for some time to get my head together & you didnt give it to me" which is true i just kept calling & msging her to find some answers. the past week she hasnt been talking to me or her daughter at all. i did see ehr last sunday & we went to a movie with our daughter. when i dropped her off i asked her if she will give me a chance to show her & make it work she said "its too soon". im so hurt & confused & so is our daughter. its very hot & cold from her. so she gone from saying " i need some time ot get my head together". i will come back soon" "i just need some time" "i love you" "its over" i really dont understand. when i have seen her she looks like shiit & very depressed. i really want ehr 2 come back but i cant help ringing & msging. she did ask for time but i havnt given it 2 her or given ehr time 2 miss me. its like she is just blocking it all out me & our daughter. she jus goes to work then gets wasted. im very worried she will break down soon. any thoughts on my situatiuon would be great. do i give her space to miss me & her daughter? does she sound very confused? will she realise what a ,istake she is making? why is she not answering my call? why mixed messages? why doesnt she want to see her daughter? why wont she talk about the situation?
kyta Posted June 25, 2008 Posted June 25, 2008 Depression is a killer, my x was on anti d's for 12 yrs, and she was just the same, although she didnt smoke weed, but says the same things when we split up, i think they find it hard to face reality, well mine does, and they run, they dont norm know why they are running, and dont know where there running to, but they still run, the best thing for you would be give her space and time, not just 10 mins, go nc, let her contact you, if she cheated on you before as mine did then its a pattern they are in, mine felt very low self esteem and low worth, and she trys to get it up with other ppl, not sleeping with them, just thinking everyone is a friend, which she craves most, deppresion is a hard thing to live with, her depresion ended up draging me down to a sort of depresion, now im out of it i dont feel depresed at all, i do miss her thats natural, but i dont miss the head mess at all, depressed ppl live very diffrent to normal ppl, and the anti d's dont help as much as ppl think, try and concentrate on your daughter and yourself for now, let time sort her head out but dont contact her let her come to you.
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