Samari Posted July 4, 2008 Posted July 4, 2008 No offense, man, but you dropped the ball with this one. Next time: Pick the restaurant. Don't reply and bitch about not being a mind-reader. You don't have to be. Given the number of types of food out there, you're statistically unlikely to pick something she dislikes anyway (unless she's super picky). Just tell her, "How does [restaurant] sound?" 9 times out of 10 she'll be fine with it. If she's not then she's free to suggest something herself. It also doesn't matter if you've never been to the restaurant. There are plenty of sites online that have reviews. And even if the restaurant does suck, you can joke about it with her after the fact.Even better: Pick two restaurants of different types. That way you have a backup to suggest if she doesn't like the first one.Kiss her on the lips at the end of the date. A cheek kiss is weak and vague. Save the cheek kisses for relatives. Just go in confidently for the kiss, like you know she wants to be kissed. If she's interested you're good to go. If she's not then she turns away and you haven't really lost anything. Big deal.For f**k's sake don't ask permission to kiss her. This is also weak. It makes you look like less of a man and like you lack confidence. I've never heard a girl claim she likes it when the guy asks.Follow up the date with a phone call rather than an email.Don't be late. That's an obvious one. If you are late, by all means apologize sincerely but don't be too apologetic. You might come across as desperate for her to like you. That's some good advice.
The Collector Posted July 4, 2008 Posted July 4, 2008 Avoid dinner dates. They are for couples already in relationships and women getting free food and drink in return for a peck on the cheek. Just go for a casual coffee, and then move onto booze if it's going well. I just generally meet for a drink, and make it alcoholic. Go somewhere where the bar staff know you if possible. As for going dutch say "if you get to know me I'm a generous guy, but I don't pay for a girl on a first date. In fact, I expect them to pay for me. Just kidding, but as a feminist I cannot support such a patriarchal system. Plus I bet all my money on a horse and it fell over. They had to shoot it, so yeah, no free food for you tonight.' You don't have to say exactly that, but it would work for me unless the woman had no sense of humour and who wants to date one of them. Try to build some physical contact into the date. Get her comfortable, make her laugh, and touch her arm. Pick a pretend eyelash of off her face. Chaperone her across the road with your hand on her back. Build intimacy. Tease her. If she likes you she might playfully punch you. Playfully punch her back, or tickle her. If all goes well, she will be gagging for a kiss. Never do anyhting cheesy that worked in a chick flick. When you feel a kiss is appropriate, say 'come here, I want to tell you something' and maybe pull her by her belt loop or something. Be cool and dominant. Look at her eyes, then her mouth. Brush some hair away from her face. Gently pull her head towards yours as you tilt your head and kiss her on the lips. Go from there. Touch her ass if you get the chance, but not in a crowded restaurant. Don't be shy or worried. Women like dominant men. They desire sex with them. If she doesn't find you attractive she'll eject and reject at some point, at which point kick her in the shins and run away. Just kidding, say 'hey no problem' and continue being cool, confident and friendly. She may well change her mind when she sees how you handle rejection. What Tanbark said too. Next time tiger.
Author jimbo Posted July 4, 2008 Author Posted July 4, 2008 Some good advice. Definitely changing the way I do first dates. Never had ones of these types who just goes to the restaurant to eat and then blows you off with no reasoning. I hear the coffee at McDonald's is getting on par with Starbucks. Maybe meet for coffee there and see how everything goes.
KingCrimson Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 Some good advice. Definitely changing the way I do first dates. Never had ones of these types who just goes to the restaurant to eat and then blows you off with no reasoning. I hear the coffee at McDonald's is getting on par with Starbucks. Maybe meet for coffee there and see how everything goes. dude. quit being dumb. No McDonalds. No chains. are you trying to convery to this girl "I'm a guy with zero class and sense of style that eats at bland chain restaurants located in eveyr neighborhood". SHOW HER SOMETHING UNIQUE. That you enjoy. Something you do, that she can't do in every other suburb out there. Don't even do Starbucks. As I said above, take her to your awesome local quirky cafe that exists only in your town, that makes the best damned strong coffee and serves the best panini sandwiches... Skip the whole dinner attitude man, again as I said above, invite her to do something with you that you'd normally do on any night out. "gee I really like doing this... wish I could introduce other people to this!". Unless of course the highlight of your night involves going out to McDonalds, Wendys, and Starbucks - in which case you might need to reavaluate your life.
Hotel Paradiso Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 Ok, if anyone read my other post, you'll know I am pretty green at dating. Like banana green. So, it seems we are going to a nice restaurant in the city this weekend. How do I know if it is alright to kiss her at the end of the date? I assume we'll hug, and then as I pull away, do I go for the kiss? I've screwed this up plenty of times, and waited for the girl to kiss me. Yea, lame for someone in their 20's, but again, very green on this dating thing. Any tips or suggestions, that would be fantastic. Yes, I also know I am over analyzing this, but I've done this for everything I have done in the past until I get comfortable.... As painful and a bit humiliating as it is. Don't analyze it. Just kiss her if you want to. If she wants to be with you, she'll be happy you'll do it. If she doesn't want to be with you, she'll evade it or not care. Bottom line: It will not reduce your chances with her, whatever way it goes. If it was meant to be, it'll happen. If not, it won't.
toughcookie Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 ask her: "Do you want to kiss me?" not "Can i kiss you" There are only 3 responses: 1) Yes (at which point its on) 2) Maybe/Hesitation (Which is the most common and which you have to say "well lets find out" and go in for it) 3) No (this is when you say "well i didn't say you could it just felt like you wanted to")
tanbark813 Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 ask her: "Do you want to kiss me?" not "Can i kiss you" There are only 3 responses: 1) Yes (at which point its on) 2) Maybe/Hesitation (Which is the most common and which you have to say "well lets find out" and go in for it) 3) No (this is when you say "well i didn't say you could it just felt like you wanted to") Mystery has some good advice and bits but this is not one of them. #3 makes no sense.
Star Gazer Posted July 8, 2008 Posted July 8, 2008 ask her: "Do you want to kiss me?" not "Can i kiss you" There are only 3 responses: 1) Yes (at which point its on) 2) Maybe/Hesitation (Which is the most common and which you have to say "well lets find out" and go in for it) 3) No (this is when you say "well i didn't say you could it just felt like you wanted to") LMAO! Those are actually awesome!
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