sid3 Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 After a month of n/c my ex texted and called to say she was sorry and missed me. Anyhow, I responded as I'm a sucker for an apology. She said I should call when I got back into town, I called a few days later and didn't hear back after leaving a voicemail. After waiting a few days, curiousity got the best of me and sent a wtf text. Said she didn't get the voice mail then asked me to come and see her at work tomorrow. Wondering if I should go and hear her out. I've always thought she plays the hot/cold game, and the disappearing act, but I'm starting to think she is just really clueless about dating and nervous.....
kizik Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Man I'm jealous of you. Go and hear her out. You're obviously on your guard now. Other LS-ers will tell you not to go. But go. Beware of her games though.
JustPassingThru Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Sounds like a bad idea.... But I'm sure nothing I or anyone else has to say will make any difference.
kizik Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Maybe I'm just saying he should go b/c I'd f*cking kill for my ex to call, apologize and then ask me to meet her. But she never will, so I'm living vicariously through "Young Sid."
Author sid3 Posted June 24, 2008 Author Posted June 24, 2008 Your right K, I am on guard now.In fact, it was her that was thanking me for talking to her after the month of n/c I intiated by telling her not to text me anymore. Her only fault I have an issue with is her sometimes flakey behavior, part of it is she is young and only had one relationship with a douchebag that abused her. So I think she is worth hearing out. She's a good girl that is sourrounded by negative people(women) with bad pasts. My intuition tells me they have given her some ****ty dating advice, stupid 'Rules' Yeah I have nothing to loose,this happens just as I was moving on, I was thinking about asking a different girl out this weekend,but depending how this goes, maybe I still will, or on the other hand maybe I won't want to. Thanks for the positive words K.
JustPassingThru Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 My ex sent me a text Saturday night. She wanted me and a friend to go out with her and her friend. Did I go? NO! Did I want to? YES! But seriously, what is there to gain? All you're doing is setting yourself up for dissapointment. I know it's hard, but you gotta let go, move on, and find someone better.
kizik Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 All you bast*rds whose exes are contacting you... F*CK YOU!! j/k... kind of.
Author sid3 Posted June 24, 2008 Author Posted June 24, 2008 my ex is begging for a second chance, i'm not sure if I will give her one or not.So I see nothing to loose. I'm not young sid, I'm middle aged sid with a young ex:eek:
v33 Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Really the best thing to do would be to ask the new girl out and go out with her instead of the ex. A) It is the best thing for you as getting back with an ex will fail most of the time. B) If you really are a glutton for punishment and want her back, then blowing her off to go out with another girl will drive her insane.
justaman99 Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 I've always thought she plays the hot/cold game, and the disappearing act. Your gut is probably right. Has she done this before? Do tell. Really the best thing to do would be to ask the new girl out and go out with her instead of the ex. B) If you really are a glutton for punishment and want her back, then blowing her off to go out with another girl will drive her insane. YUP! Do it! -Just
justine4 Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 I agree with Kizik's first post, and justamans too. If the feelings are still there - why not? The worst that can happen is that it doesn't work out, but what if it did? What if the month of NC and brought her to her senses and she's realised how much she cares for you? Its a brave step forward she made in contacting you. She wouldn't put herself up for fear of rejection, unless she thought it was worth it. Go for it! Can you also give a bit of background on your breakup? I take it she broke up with you? Did you go NC straight away?
LikeCharlotte Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Its a brave step forward she made in contacting you. She wouldn't put herself up for fear of rejection, unless she thought it was worth it. I agree with justine (who agrees with Kiz and just, lol) Go to talk to her and listen. You've gained a little distance so look carefully with your new found perspective. It was indeed brave for her to call don't let her attempt go unanswered. You don't have to try again but you should listen.
cyabye Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Move on. Listen to what she already told you when she left. See her at work? Yeah right. How much time will she be able to talk? WOW, she is SO brave for calling you (after she rejected you). I wouldn't even respond to her. PERIOD. GAMES are for children. If you don't go, you will regain POWER. If you do and it's not what you want to hear or expect (and I don't think it is), you will be back to day one of no contact. NO CONTACT = no calling, texting, emailing, letter writing, sky writing, flowers, balloons, whatever..... cyabye
CailinPig Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 OH MY GOD!!! You're so lucky!! You know what? If you feel your heart can take being broken again, then go for it. If you feel like your heart isn't ready for that chance, then maybe don't. But with love, you should always take chances. Always! You lucky fu**er!! I am unbelievably jealous!!
justine4 Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 Move on. Listen to what she already told you when she left. See her at work? Yeah right. How much time will she be able to talk? WOW, she is SO brave for calling you (after she rejected you). I wouldn't even respond to her. PERIOD. GAMES are for children. If you don't go, you will regain POWER. If you do and it's not what you want to hear or expect (and I don't think it is), you will be back to day one of no contact. NO CONTACT = no calling, texting, emailing, letter writing, sky writing, flowers, balloons, whatever..... cyabye It must be good to live in a place where everything is black and white. Theres always grey areas around and I believe it isn't as clear cut as you make things out to be. When feelings are involved, its a different matter altogether.
cyabye Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 It must be good to live in a place where everything is black and white. Theres always grey areas around and I believe it isn't as clear cut as you make things out to be. When feelings are involved, its a different matter altogether. Ahem, after living in the grey area for 10 years, it finally had to be black and white otherwise it would always be a grey area. You know what? Black and white feels GOOD. Feelings are just that - FEELINGS. They change from day to day. Shoot my dog has feelings. So what. The facts of a situation are black and white. Live in a grey area if that makes you happy. I'd rather see it for what it truly is and keep the BS feelings out of it. In this stage of the "game", only my feelings count. Not by my choice. cyabye
serendip Posted June 24, 2008 Posted June 24, 2008 After a month of n/c my ex texted and called to say she was sorry and missed me. Anyhow, I responded as I'm a sucker for an apology. She said I should call when I got back into town, I called a few days later and didn't hear back after leaving a voicemail. After waiting a few days, curiousity got the best of me and sent a wtf text. Said she didn't get the voice mail then asked me to come and see her at work tomorrow. Wondering if I should go and hear her out. I've always thought she plays the hot/cold game, and the disappearing act, but I'm starting to think she is just really clueless about dating and nervous..... My ex contacted me in March to meet up (sorry kizik)...it was the worst mistake I've ever made. We were pretty harsh with each other...she started crying until I made her feel better(which made me feel worse) and the clincher...the hug. She was patting my back while she was hugging me when we were saying our goodbyes. I suppose if I was being nice to her and telling her all the things she wanted to hear...we might have gotten back together(she was confused and still had strong feelings for me after a yr)...but she wouldn't change her behaviour or work on her issues. So I don't see the point.
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